excellent update

What a great but sad chapter. Excellent story.

lovely chapter, thanks ever so much. is this a Harry and Hermione romance? or Luna and Harry? I hope is a Hermione and Harry don't like Luna at all, thanks again.

This was nice. Overall very interesting.

This is what we call a run on sentence. "She sighed as she curled her legs under her as she stared into the flickering flames thoughtfully." For clear communication each sentence should express a complete idea. it might be written "She sighed as she curld her legs under her. Hermione stared thoughtfully into the flickering flames."

"She failed to notice the couple in the picture watching over her protectively. Hermione sat up and alert at the sound of a crash." While there is nothing wrong gramatically here, I'd break the second sentence into a new paragraph. This indicates time has passed and something new is happening.

I really liked the part with the book, it is more imaginative than her finding the book hidden in her dorm, more magical anyway. Take away, mind your sentences and break scenes to show the passage of time or change of action. Other than that, this was well done.

nice start

oh my this story keep getting better and better every time I read it Poor Harry and Hermione, thanks ever so much, and Lilly is so great and smart as well. thanks again.

Interesting start to your story.

One thing that jumps out at me is the fact you tend to use hair color to identify many of your characters. Physical descriptions are not wrong but like anything else it can be overused. Having so many in so few paragraphs make it much more noticeable - for practice you might try mixing in a few other identifiers such as an article of clothing, jewelry, or perhaps a wand type.

In the forth paragraph there is a tense error or typo it should be "Ron owed her and Harry". Tense change errors are common and tend to spoil an otherwise nice paragraph.

Most of the rest flowed nicely. I liked the interaction between the characters. Nice build of of suspense as Hermione tried to find out who was head boy. Ron is after Lavender but Luna seems after Ron that should be fun. "The Head Boy badge glowed across Harry's heart..." that was my favorite phrase in this chapter.

Great post
I hope Harry can see his Mom.
Until next time
Gloeia

good update

wow great 11 chapters thanks ever so much for updating this story I've missed it and welcome back, can;t wait for chapter 12. thanks again.

I can't wait to see what you do next or Harry's reaction to when he reads that book. Talk about being reckless? :) *snickerfits* Still... I like it and I hope to see more soon.

Great post
Update soon please, i can not wait!
Until next time
Gloria

Great post
I hate cliffies! Hurry up and post!
until next time
Gloria
P.S : As for stories with threesome pairings I don't read them.

Hmm What could cause a magical storm? Could it be old Moldy shorts or something even more ominous?

Now we are getting some where...will the bond register at the ministry...will Harry realize it?