I should start by saying that I have no critique for this story. It was beautiful. Everything that was alluded to was explained; there were no stray plot lines or awkward lines of dialogue that made me think, 'Why are the characters thinking of that?' The story was built slowly but effectively, so that I never felt bored nor lost in the plot. (I may also add that I find it hilarious that we both wrote about Ishizu work for the Supreme Council of Antiquities, just as we both wrote about the Valley of the Kings last round).

And then that letter came and I was not expecting it. Your writing shone in this section – there was so much feeling in your words that I almost started crying. I feel that this section changed how I saw Pegasus, both in this story and in canon. Thank you for writing such a touching piece.

I have no advice to give you. You delivered such a good story that I as a writer cannot nitpick on anything significant.

Great work and I hope you make it to next round!