Lovely little story

see its writers like you who make it impossible for me to read anything marauders because i just start crying halfway and then i cant see through the tears

"…was a little started by the sudden…" I do believe started is supposed to be startled?

How you opened this chapter was really fun. I enjoyed the way Lily's just sort of flounced in with a bang, irritating the librarian in the process, and starts to complain to Remus about his friends. It was quite light-hearted and very nice given that things didn't stay that way too long.

I really enjoyed the conflict of emotions Remus goes through in this chapter. How at first it's about James flirting with Lily and the fact he's annoyed and jealous that he's done that when he likes her, while all the while trying to convince himself his irritation with James is on Lily's behalf.

The later part where he's noticing the way things have changed between him and Lily and believing it'll never go any further because he's a werewolf and who'd love a monster like him was an interesting sentiment to end the chapter on as it leaves one curious to see just how he and Lily will deal with that issue.

My favorite part with Lily this chapter is after Remus gives his excuse and she's extremely emotive in her sympathy for what he's going through. I wonder if she knows that it's a lie or if she thinks his mother's terribly sick with something and she's familiar with having a close family member who is very, very sick.

It's so sweet and fluffy!

...So why did you kill Remus and Sirius, nooooooo...

Loved the story!

It's a really great story, but did you really have to kill Remus? Still it is very touching, especially the ending!

So heartbreaking, so happy and so sad.

This was a cute way to have the their first meeting go.

I like how Lily was expecting she'd be Slytherin until she wasn't. I'm sure Severus would have attempted to convince that's where she'd go, since he'd not want to lose her anymore than she wanted to lose him at this point in their friendship.

It's good that Remus and her got to talking and he told her he was a half-blood. It was nice of him to let her know that and to make her feel better by continuing to chat with her until she was feeling better about herself and her future at Hogwarts.

Oh my gosh, these two are just so adorable! I was just smiling all through this chapter it was so fluffy. I bet Remus isn’t as innocent as Lily thinks and is probably in on his friends’ pranks, at least a little. He might not have done this one, but I’m sure his record isn’t squeaky clean either. I think you really nailed Remus’ voice and his insecurities. Even after five years he thinks Lily would leave if she found out that he was really a werewolf. Meanwhile there’s little hints that she’s already figured it out.

Cheers!

Aw, I feel for Lily here, wanting a familiar face when she’s off to a new school in an unfamiliar world. It makes me wonder how much of her friendship with Severus was based just on that, people often cling to something familiar when they’re new.

I liked the little details you included here about Sirius being uncomfortable, either because of Gryffindor or because Lily’s a muggleborn, I’m undecided which– although I feel like she would have recognized him from the train where he and James were rude to Severus? Unless this is AU and that didn’t happen.

Lily befriending Remus is so cute, and he’s a much better friend than Severus who already has Lily insecure that her muggle parentage is some sort of disadvantage. It’s a relief to see her gaining some independence and realizing she can make other friends and that she’s not as ‘odd’ as she thinks. I’m really biased against Snape. Then there’s little Remus who is probably just really excited to be at Hogwarts and doesn’t care about Houses or blood or anything other than he actually gets to go and make friends.

Cheers

Oh gosh, the start of this chapter! I just can't even. I am so deeply in love with your character voice and the way you write them!

Remus and Lily are just too adorable, and that little argument in the beginning had me laughing so hard.

Gosh, this dialogue is just natural. Have I said that? I usually review as I go, but I keep forgetting because I keep getting pulled into it and sort of watching it unfold in my mind. Teen Lily is just funny, and poor clueless teen Remus.

I absolutely love Lily's justification for going on a date with James, though now I'm curious to know why their date was so horrible! Did James do something? It was probably James. That's what I'm going with. I love that she was smart enough to deduce that, though, which is something that I think is overlooked in a lot of fics. She's definitely Remus' equal in so many ways, and the way you write them, they're so suited for each other. Her stubbornness totally makes up for his shyness.

This chapter was just way too adorable! Gosh, and I love the ending! I can't wait to read the rest and see where you take this AU. :3

[startled Remus out of his concentration] - This sounded a bit awkward to me. I think maybe it's because there's two separate thoughts being smooshed into one, maybe, or that's the way it sounds to me? Startled him (this implies the second part about concentration) or broke his concentration (which implies that he's startled or at least distracted) or something like that might read smoother.

oh, I love the opening to this chapter so much. xD You do such an excellent job of capturing the characters and their voice. I can see everything so clearly, and a peeved off Lily just has me giggling, and poor Remus trying to sit there all innocent like he wasn't at least mildly involved. I love your choice of prank and how Lily reacts to it.

Very nice foreshadowing with Remus' feelings, too! It's OK, Remus. The Rily is very natural. Just let it happen. :P Go with the flow.

Awwww. I can't help but feel all melty at Remus getting distracted and happy from Lily sitting next to him. And you think you don't do romance well. It's adorable! Reminds me what it's like to be a kid.

Ugh, that last line! You capture poor Remus' thoughts so perfectly, and after such an adorable chapter, that last line is such a killer. It really grounds us and brings us back to the painful reality that Remus lives in, always with the shadow of what he is and feeling like he's inferior. I love that this ends with such a gritty, realistic, painful subject to remind us that life isn't all sunshine and roses.

I really like the way you start this, with Lily in mild shock over her House. I mean, when you think about it, the only connection she had to the wizarding world was Snape, so of course she had no reason not to believe him. I like this little glimpse into her expectations and, perhaps, her naivety, as well.

You do a wonderful job of setting up Lily's (extremely naive, at this point) expectations that just maybe Snape would stay with her. The mention of fighting with her sister was a really nice way to ground us about what exactly is at stake for Lily. After all, she's thrown into a world she didn't even know exist, had to leave her family behind, it created a rift between her and her sister, and now she's just realized that she's separated, too, from the only person she knows. You did a great job at setting even this little scene up as sort of high-stakes, or that's how it must seem to an 11-year-old.

Oh, lovely foreshadowing with Remus being happy to get into Hogwarts at all. I love Remus' backstory, too, and his mother insisting on the Muggle way. It creates such an adorable connection between the two, and I just wanna huggle little Remus.

This was a great first encounter!

SPaG:
[when other were sorted] - others
[budged father down] - farther or further

Interesting choice to have their anniversary fall on a full moon. It's actually quite a great one, considering it is bound to happen at some point, especially considering that witches and wizards live so much longer than Muggles.
I really love how you describe the friendship between Remus and the rest of the Marauders. I also love how you describe their relationship with Lily. I also really appreciate that you didn't feel the need to bash James in order to make Lily and Remus work. I don't think I mentioned that before, but sometimes I find that writers bash one character in order to make another pairing work and it annoys me.
I can't even imagine how hard it would be...must be to watch someone you care about go through something like that transformation. I imagine it takes a lot for James, Sirius and Peter to watch that every full moon. And I like that you show that, Gryffindor or not, there are somethings Lily can't handle. I find it totally believable that she wouldn't be able to handle watching Remus turn and being unable to help in any way during that process.
I find it interesting that she wouldn't tell Remus or any of the Marauders that she casts a Silencing Charm every full moon. It's not unbelievable, just an interesting choice.
Hmmm...so we are hinting towards traitor Peter? Well, now I don't feel so bad for hating him.
The line, "He and Marlene had been dating..." is the only bit of extra information I've read that has felt a little forced. It's not that it isn't interesting or that it doesn't help us suss out what's going on around this couple, I think it's just the placing of the information that makes it feel forced in there.
Another sweet ending to this chapter. You did a wonderful job integrating canon and your AU changes, not just in this chapter but throughout your story so far.

Right from the start you have me smiling with James' line. I love how even your side characters don't fall flat on personality. You've also been doing a great job throughout this setting the stage for the reader. Remus is the first to get married is a bit of extra info that could have been forced into this chapter, but you manage to add it, as you always have with tidbits like this, effortlessly and authentically.
The sentence where you say, "had been wearing Muggle clothes in rebellion from his..." the wording is a bit weird. More specifically, using from in here is a bit weird. It honestly just doesn't flow as well as it could and it just sits weird on the tongue as I read. I would changing the word to something like against just to make it flow better.
I actually almost said "Poor Peter" when I read that description. I guess in this story it's completely possibly he isn't a traitor not deserving of any of my pity...but I still hate him. This means that you making me forget that I hate him enough to find him adorably ignorant is quite the feat. I'm also curious as to what James did wrong. I would find that mental image equally adorable and amusing.
Oh, well, waistcoats and bow ties can be complicated. I didn't even know there was an upside down with waistcoats.
I have been warned away from using the same word so close together so I thought I should point out "but couldn't help but smile." However, I honestly don't know how to suggest a solution because after the second time reading the line I realized why it is worded the way it is. It would be hard to find a better way to word it.
Also in "small ceremony in the small back garden at..." changing the second small to something like modest is a great way to convey that it is not a large backyard without using the same word so close together.
I find it a really interesting choice that you had most of this chapter about Remus and his friends getting ready for the wedding instead of description of the wedding and the reception and all that stuff. It is a bit of an unusual choice and I like it because of that, especially with focus on the groom and not the bride.
This was a really cute ending and it gave me all sorts of feels, of the warm and fuzzy variety of course. This was a great take on the wedding and I can't wait to review the next chapter.

As always your characterization never falters. I also find it interesting that, as I read more I've noticed more, Remus' condition is very prominent in this story. I imagine that's because his condition is very prominent in his life, but I find people sometimes stop mentioning it after a while, but you keep it sort of forefront. I have also noticed this is only during chapters where we read from his point of view. I find this to be a very clever way of showing how much it effects his life.
The line, "Why, thank you, dear heart," is strange to me...not the whole line, just the "dear heart" part of it. This could be because I've never heard the phrase before, but also it could be that it feels just a bit redundant with the next line being Mrs. Lupin's acknowledgement of Lily's offer being kind.
You don't capitalize "Mum" and it should be capitalized when Remus is calling Mrs. Lupin that. As in, "Very subtle, Mum."
"The boys have been a huge help with helping me..." This also feels redundant, especially using the word help multiple times so close together. By way of suggestion, maybe consider having her say "so wonderful" instead of "huge help" just to avoid the redundancy.
Getting further down in the chapter, I realize the point of describing Mrs. Lupin as looking tired. Her husband has died, and she is taking care of her werewolf son practically alone. This has clearly taken a toll on her, something that would also make Remus feel guilty. That was such a subtle hint to the way his condition effects, not just him, but his family too, and it was brilliant.
You say you struggled with this chapter but it really doesn't feel that way to me. You added in some information about how Lily learned about the illegal Animagi and that was good information and most importantly, it didn't feel forced in there like filler.
I also found the interaction between the three presented this chapter to be natural. The conversation wasn't stiff or forced and Mrs. Lupin was organic. The ending was very cute as well and I enjoyed reading this chapter.