WOW! This story was absolutely fantastic! Not even gonna lie it definitely took up so much of my time to read it but was soooooooo worth it... Who needs to go to lectures anyway?

Your story was absolutely amazing. Your writing skills make it a really enjoyable book to read. Thank you for all the time and effort you must have put into it. The best fan fiction I’ve read. I particularly liked the relationship you created between snape and Lorena.

you stole the entire plot and many ideas from green eyed monster lol

I seriously doubt you read these anymore, but I’ll leave a review anyway.

First, this story is one of my all time favorites. I love the sibling dynamic as well as the peek into the world of slytherin that Lorena grants us. Some questions have been raised for me, however.

First, the slytherin plot line. You took their typical reputation and turned it on it’s head: you made THEM the target of prejudice. You showed several instances of gryffindor seventh years bullying slytherin first years. Slytherins are notorious for throwing around words like “mudblood” which, in this universe, is as abhorrent as someone using a racial slur in our universe. From that scope, I do not believe taking offense to this word is childish or immature, as lorena implies at one point I believe. Using language like that is more than hurtful, deeper than hateful. There are many layers to the slytherin prejudice. They’re also extremely wealthy and privileged. Their positions of power mean it would be absurdly easy for a slytherin student’s parents to intervene, I would say, 80% of the time? That allows for a certain margin of muggleborn slytherin, or even pureblood families who, for whatever reason, might hate their child enough to not want to lift a finger to help them IF they were bullied. That brings me to my issue. By being slytherin, the stigma alone is likely enough to prevent other houses from openly bullying them out of fear of consequence... right? Or it should be, unless those slytherin children who are targeted come from muggle families, and then isn’t the gryffindor bully practicing the same vitriol which they denounce?

Second, why you’ve chosen to hone in on Harry’s flaws. He certainly has a temper but I think he is self aware enough to see past it if one of his loved ones is suffering greatly. Specifically the chapter where lorena tries to join dumbledores army at one point at he yells at her to just go after just witnessing everyone pile on her about what a shitty person they think she is. This seems OOC on Harry’s part. There are certain characters that Harry has hated, like snape and pettigrew, but then Harry didn’t have the same foundation of a shared childhood with them like he did with Lorena. You would think that their bond would always outshine, in the end, yet it hasn’t. He allowed the public’s opinion of his sister to cloud his own judgment and thats... an interesting story choice. I’m not going to say it’s impossible. It just seems... questionable.

Third, I do wonder about lorenas capabilities. She is smart, almost overly so. She’s smarter than granger but she’s also mean. All the teachers seem to agree that lorena is frighteningly smart and yet I can’t recall seeing any great consequence from this. They all treat her equally, except snape who treats her like his own daughter. The one great exception to this is... dumbledore? Here’s my issue with that. If dumbledore can see past snapes terrible attitude, his SHITTY life choices (joining Voldemort) enough to bring him under his wing... it’s VERY surprising to me that he can’t extend that same strategy to Lorena, considering what we know of her own intelligence and capabilities. She would be an invaluable asset to dumbledore. I do think he would humble himself enough to at least PRETEND to be the friendly old man, and test out the same persona he uses with Harry on her, however superficial it may be. And it might not have even worked. I guess my issue is that he never even really tried? From like the first real test we see, dumbledore interrogates Lorena after she’s severely injured by Fluffy and then pretends like nothing ever happened. OBVIOUSLY that’s off putting for Lorena, not to mention cruel. Now he’s lost an invaluable asset: Harry’s sister who is arguably smarter than hermione. Huh? slytherin or not, dumbledore would WANT her in his arsenal, and I believe he would do a great number of humbling things to try and coax her to his side.

That’s not to say that Lorena wouldn’t figure out his motives in a second. The way you’ve written her, I think she would suss it out. She might even see straight through him. BUT ... she’s a SLYTHERIN. They are social ladder climbing acrobats! She should be DYING to have a wizard like him in HER corner. It’s crazy to me that she wouldn’t try and beat him at his own game, that she wouldn’t pull the same shit she did with umbridge on dumbledore, and I think you’ve made her clever enough to get away with it. I could see the two of them engaging in a kind of “what can you do for me” relationship from the very start.

Yeah, i love this story to pieces but there were some questionable choices made here. No doubt.

This is one of the best works of lit I have ever read. It is more enjoyable than the original books. This might be my favorite thing to read in my spare time.

This was a recommendation from my older sister, and I already LOVE it!

This has been the most amazing journey. I loved every second of Lorena Potter ️ The ups and downs, the good and the bad. This is incredible. Thank you for putting pen to paper

you know what me think when I finally reach the end of the book? well, first finally I could sleep lmao, this book have taking so much of my night, and also for me, this book better than the original book, sorry jk rowlin, but I'm slytherin in the heart and I always think harry and his friend sometimes dumn and really have the urge to whack their head and their messed up plan lol, it really pleased me seeing a character like lorena potter. I'm so sad that the character not cannon. and the development of the story! goddammit! this is really masterpiece, I can tell you are a potterhead hehe, because the way you describe, potray character is damn straight damn right damn acurate! I love the development of the character here, first draco, I love you are not erased his cocky and arrogance in the first until four year, I love how you are make their enemies first and turn them lover next, because mostly I found that draco pair in fanfic out there started with ooc draco malfoy who absurd kind goofy since the started. second I almost hate harry potter here hahahha but then glad he change and be a good brother like he should, still I hate ron weasley until the end! third hermione and daphnee is lovely, thanks for making hermione not end up with such horible person like ronald weasley, even in the book I hate briliant character like hermione and up with him. daphnee is sweet mother, I love her and a bit jealous because I found out that I'm also in love with theodore nott, who doesn't? but I'll go for zabini because he still single. and my dear or boy tom riddle, I love how is gentle and kind soul still living inside rena, but I kinda hurt in the end of the war everyone hug harry but not lorena, because to me she done much than harry on hunting the hocrux, like all harry do is just cheated death and expeliarmus, while lorena tortured, plan this and that, keep everyone save. but I love the ending, the new family of weasley-potter-malfoy, and her career after that, I loathe rita and kingsley tho, and btw thanks for killing dumbledor, Rena dear, I hate the old man too. even in the canon dumbledoor is not a character that I fond of. over all I love this and maybe will find myself reread this book in the future. I can't get enough of this book. thank you for the journey. I love you, the book, and lorena potter.

you know what me think when I finally reach the end of the book? well, first finally I could sleep lmao, this book have taking so much of my night, and also for me, this book better than the original book, sorry jk rowlin, but I'm slytherin in the heart and I always think harry and his friend sometimes dumn and really have the urge to whack their head and their messed up plan lol, it really pleased me seeing a character like lorena potter. I'm so sad that the character not cannon. and the development of the story! goddammit! this is really masterpiece, I can tell you are a potterhead hehe, because the way you describe, potray character is damn straight damn right damn acurate! I love the development of the character here, first draco, I love you are not erased his cocky and arrogance in the first until four year, I love how you are make their enemies first and turn them lover next, because mostly I found that draco pair in fanfic out there started with ooc draco malfoy who absurd kind goofy since the started. second I almost hate harry potter here hahahha but then glad he change and be a good brother like he should, still I hate ron weasley until the end! third hermione and daphnee is lovely, thanks for making hermione not end up with such horible person like ronald weasley, even in the book I hate briliant character like hermione and up with him. daphnee is sweet mother, I love her and a bit jealous because I found out that I'm also in love with theodore nott, who doesn't? but I'll go for zabini because he still single. and my dear or boy tom riddle, I love how is gentle and kind soul still living inside rena, but I kinda hurt in the end of the war everyone hug harry but not lorena, because to me she done much than harry on hunting the hocrux, like all harry do is just cheated death and expeliarmus, while lorena tortured, plan this and that, keep everyone save. but I love the ending, the new family of weasley-potter-malfoy, and her career after that, I loathe rita and kingsley tho, and btw thanks for killing dumbledor, Rena dear, I hate the old man too. even in the canon dumbledoor is not a character that I fond of. over all I love this and maybe will find myself reread this book in the future. I can't get enough of this book. thank you for the journey. I love you, the book, and lorena potter.

I hate reviewers like that. I love this book. 1.1m words is not easy the write and stick with to finish. I've read this book 4 time. and I still discover new stuff ive missed to 1st time ive read it. favorite followed and downloaded

What I really love about this story, and what keeps me coming back over and over again, is the way you wrote an arguably unlikable character, shifted the perspective (and forever changed my outlook on slytherins) and did so in a way that gave the original story new depth.

A lot of what Lorena saw in her years at hogwarts and beyond was dark, and it shed light on an unspoken prejudice. You were able to show that not even the golden trio is immune from prejudice.

Now, for what I think of lorena. I think she is too smart for her own good, and at the same time she’s narcissistic and acutely fixated on her brothers life all the way up to the later chapters. She’s constantly comparing herself against him. She’s constantly worried how others see her in comparison to him. It’s not necessarily a good character trait. And yet, it’s completely understandable why and totally believable given A) Harry is the ‘Chosen One’ and B) the way Harry and her were raised outside of hogwarts.

I can see how the fact that dumbledore forced them to live in such conditions might have been enough to turn Lorena against him, but his mistreatment and blatant constant suspicion of her definitely sealed the deal. Why? Because she is slytherin. And moreover, because if anyone threatened to turn Harry against dumbledore it was Lorena. He was worried about her influence over her brother at every turn. And add to that, the fact NO ONE else in the golden trio realized it bc dumbledore was SO manipulative.

Admittedly, it’s possible you made dumbledore a little more sinister than he really was in canon. Yes, he might be OOC. But you do it in a way that makes sense in order for you to tell your story, and you do it so well that by the end I almost hated the headmaster myself.

I loved Lorena and snapes relationship! He was her mentor and her friend, and clearly she thought of him like a father. She said as much.

ALSO. I loooooved the way you wrote her and draco. BOTH of them have issues. Draco is never afraid to point out her faults, and vice versa. draco WAS a coward but you developed their relationship so well that I completely believed the way draco was willing to change his selfish ways for her. He is a slytherin, after all, and he is loyal to those he cares about above all else.

Just, really, overall I feel like you captured an antihero soooo perfectly and Audrey fits into the world so well I’m honestly sad she isn’t canon. Thank you for sharing this piece of work. Thank you for inspiring me and giving me ideas on my own projects. Just, thank you.

I'm sorry to say im going to have to drop the story here. the writing has been solid, and the concept of harry having a twin sister who also goes through what he did at the dursleys has been interesting, however with you skipping 2 years i can't help but think that you belive her to be so inconsequential that the golden trio dont change, malfoy doesnt change, events dont drastically change, nothing. that you can add a new person in harry's life without it drastically changing the story means that the character brings nothing to the story and/or events get shoehorned to fit cannon regardless of how the characters would likely react differently. I'm sorry, but i personally just don't buy it

Fantastic, many thanks for writing this.

This was simply a Masterpiece I couldn’t put down.

holy mcfrickelballs that was amazing! i absolutely adore all the detail in this story, and how you shone a light on Tom Riddle and Slytherin values! really amazing story that deserves way way wayyyy more credit!

that ending really hit me in the feels! it was exactly like finishing other good published books and i love it sosososososososososososososososo much! i know its been years since you last updated this thing, and im hoping that you went somewhere far in life!

ps this was my first ever HP fanfic and i have to say, you set the bar wayy too high now :o