It’s weird that Nathan is in the corner curled up. Apparently this happens often though so no need to really worry. Well, except for Lucas it seems. The rest are just kind of like, yeah, he’s relapsed. And I get a feeling of what’s going on here.

The doctor part is interesting. I’m curious to see what Joel has to say. I like the exchange between the two of them. Getting caught up is always interesting. This almost reminds me more of Wizard of Oz. Like people in real life are reflected in dream world.

Aw, it’s so sad about Lucas. I almost wanted more information there. But it’s not his story.

I find it interesting how Kristin is just a doctor that Bill has never met. That makes things very interesting. I still think it would be a fantastic idea to contact her. It would help him realize she’s not the same person he’s imagining. I’m kind of surprised Joel didn’t say anything about that.

What if the real world is the fantasy world? Whaaat?

This is so weird. I don’t know which side I’m on. I want the crew to survive, but honestly, I kind of want Nathan to be in the real world. I couldn’t bear to imagine him in a corner of a room for the rest of his life. That’s just sad.

Yeah, don’t think I care for this one. It’s not… IDK. I can’t bear to think of him sitting all alone. It makes me really sad. Yeah… I don’t know what to say. I’m… I’m speechless.

Oh, hey, a completely unexpected freebie review that has nothing to do with prizes, nothing at all. ;D

I've been curious to read this one-shot of yours for literally weeks, so I decided to use the Hunt to motivate myself to finally get around to taking the time to read it. And I'm really glad I picked this one! I'm a giant sucker for any fiction to do with portrayals of mental illness, and I've read enough seaQuest fanfiction by now to be familiar with the premise and the characters, so I didn't feel fandom-blind at all and was able to really appreciate the twist on canon you did here. Psychological thrillers with things like unreliable narrators are one of my favorite genres, so this was right up my alley, and I thought you did a really lovely job with it!

Onto the actual story:

I REALLY, REALLY like the way you used Bill to reveal the world-building mechanics of the AU. I thought it was a really smart decision to explain the "real-world" connections of where Nathan met all the "fantasy characters" (as you've cast the characters in the show to be - I'm just going to use the terminology of your world in this review, I think) and how they wound up in his vision of the crew using somebody other than Nathan, which was a move that went a long way to show us your setup but avoid it feeling like an information dump. Revealing it through dialogue with the psychiatrist was a great way of incorporating that information into the flow and plot movement of the story, and conveying it via Bill instead of Nathan also helped to flesh out the relationship between the two by demonstrating Bill's concern for Nathan alongside the backstory /because/ of Bill's feelings about that backstory, if that makes sense.

I really enjoyed the detail that Kristin was the only one whom Nathan had only met once and who didn't have a longer or better-known connection with him: I thought that said a lot about the kind of connection Nathan felt to her that he'd incorporate her in the fantasy in such a pivotal romantic role after only having met her on one occasion in person, and I also though it was painful in the best way how that made it basically unfeasible to try to reach out to the real Kristin to come talk Nathan back into reality. For similar reasons, I also liked that you had the real Lucas have passed away right before Nathan's dip into fantasy - it made Nathan's situation even more empathetic and helped make it even more believable that he would try to cope with this onslaught of traumatic things happening all on top of each other with escapism. And then it was just tragic and fantastic that you depicted seaQuest as having been an actual thing that had been in the works before Nathan became totally unfit to captain it and it fell apart without him there to lead it - great for Nathan's character development, for one thing, but also helped explain why he would latch onto seaQuest as the fantasy instead of trying to sell the story as him totally fabricating the entire concept of the ship.

I found it really interesting that you portrayed Nathan's moments of connection with the real world as him having these shaking panic attacks in the fantasy world: I wouldn't have expected that, but it makes so much sense that being in touch with reality would make him unable to fully escape into the world of seaQuest the way that he would at times when he's fully-fledged out of things, and it was cool to see the mechanics of how connecting with people out in the world would cause the fantasy to break down. That said, really my only criticism of this story is that I feel like you didn't explore Nathan's point of view as much as you could have. I got this great understanding of what exactly happened to him through Bill and the psychiatrist, and also a great portrayal of how the seaQuest fantasy had manifested through Kristin. As a side note, it was interesting in a way I'm not sure how I feel about that you gave a fictional character (fictional because of the fantasy, I mean) POV scenes and showed the crew meeting without Nathan there, because you'd think that they'd cease to exist without Nathan there in his mind with them, wouldn't they? But even though you did show us /some/ of Nathan's point of view-and it was wonderful when you did, and it was so interesting how even when talking to Bill he didn't have a handle on things because he'd mentally "brought" Kristin along with him, and if he really did fully understand that seaQuest wasn't real, he wouldn't have found it strange that Bill couldn't see Kristin there with him-I feel like all of my understanding of Nathan's fractured mental state is coming from other characters, so I didn't fully understand exactly how things were in his head (even if you'd given us the external reasons to justify it) or understand exactly why he made the choice that he did at the end. An extra scene or two in the middle of the story to show Nathan actively moving between the two worlds or something like that would have helped me understand him as a character a lot better, I think.

Wonderful work either way!

There were a few places missing words, probably because of upload problems ("since also knew," "after brief moment"), as well as a few other assorted errors ("voice... like a child," use of past perfect in explanations).
That said, you constructed a lot of interesting layers to Nathan's madness: the situation-aware crew, torn between the desire to see their captain happy and their fear of death; Nathan's inability to deal with the reality, and the strange sensation that that's somehow a good thing; Bill's sense of reluctant obligation. Truly a complex and fascinating one-shot.

Unique perspective. Sad, angsty, but I like the warmth and tactile relationship he has with his Kristin. I totally understand that anyone totally devasted by loss would/could create their own reality. Who is to say which is the more genuine for someone like this?

Wow, I was starting to wonder if you'd given up on me, lol. I know this time of year is crazy for me too. Can't believe it took me a whole day to see this! Very different idea but very interesting! Love it, of course. Glad you are writing again!

Hi, dear :) Not sure what you mean by "creepypasta", but you always do unique ideas fabulously, so I'm game ;)

Definitely an intriguing opening – Nathan must be in a seriously bad state to suffer a breakdown in a public area like the ward room. And I'm kinda with Kristin on the others blowing off calling her immediately – c'mon, guys, you're smarter than this. :taps foot: If she's the only one who can get through to him, don't delay calling her!

Of course, I must remember that this is technically all in his head...so this (and past) breakdowns is because they're trying to yank him back to the real world.

The first Bill scene is really great and, while explaining back story of how Nathan ended up in this state (and info for the fandom blind), we get to see just how difficult this has been for him to watch his closest friend fall apart at the seams. It's taking a toll on him, but underneath there's that determination that he doesn't wanna just write Nathan off as a lost cause, that he sees something there, some shred of hope that he will recover and move on with his life.

The conversation with Dr. Carpenter was rather enlightening. I was going into this thinking that everyone was a figment of his imagination but you surprise me by having them all actually exist, just obviously not on SQ. But that's a good idea to maybe bring in the others and give Nathan a little dose of reality...if it works. But oh damn, Lucas is dead...I am now wondering if that contributed to Nathan's breakdown. Sadface :( I did really like the bit about how he met Kristin in the real world – if only... Also I like the doctor's logic, even if he never comes out of it, his happiness is what matters in the end.

The second scene with the crew made me curious(er) – so they KNOW they're a figment of Nathan's tormented imagination? That's...very interesting. Wasn't expecting that at all. That being said, I think their reactions are very realistic, wondering if it will be painful, etc. Lucas' fretting over Darwin and Katie wondering aloud abt the rest of the crew were great touches. I did really like that Kristin told him it was his decision if he wanted to return to the real world but that she'd always be there if he decided to remain/return to "their" world.

[No matter what could be waiting for me out there, it'll never be like the world we have now.] – this is so true. Because while Bill's offer is tempting (as Kristin frets), there's no telling whether real-world Kristin would connect with Nathan or not.

I love that he decided to remain where he was. Even if it IS just a "rabbit hole", it's what makes him comfortable and happy. (Tho I got a giggle out of Miguel's "um, are we still alive?" comment).

Itty bit nitpick: I'm surprised the doctor addresses Bill as "Mr." Noyce instead of by his rank. Seems a tad out of place. But that's just MHO.

Loved it! Awesomely unique and well done, dear :)

Excellent!
I love these types of stories and your angle was great and unexpected :)

Yes I choose to stay in Wonderland!

Thanks for the great one shot and for keeping the fantasy alive :D

Great story.
Thank you for sharing this story with us the readers.
I found it well written.
Nabs

I'm sorry, but I just had to stop everything and read this - the premise just sounded too good. I'm quite familiar with creepypasta's work, so I can only imagine that this will take some reeeeeally crazy twists and turns *builds pillow fort and puts pot on head* let's do this.

Quite an intense beginning here, Darkin, I really love it. I think that you've emulated the spirit of a creepypasta prompt really well. There's an element of uncertainty and confusion that I think is so well-designed that you can't help but get a little bit creeped out about what's happening to Nathan. I am very curious as to why/how Kristin knows what's going on and boy, am I REALLY curious as to find out who "they" are.

I love how you present Bill as a good friend who keeps his promises, yet he can't help but feel tired at having to watch after Nathan after all these years. A promise is a promise, yes, but watching after someone is time-consuming and can be emotionally draining. But still, he goes.

[As you know, he's living in his own reality...] Personally, I felt this was a little intrusive, as I would assume that Dr. Carpenter already knows this as medical fact. If you eliminated this line, I think it would go over a little smoother, but YMMV on that regard :)

At any rate, I love the references to Alice in Wonderland (which is where I'm assuming the prompt came from) with [the looking glass] and [Wonderland] throughout the conversation between Bill and Dr. Carpenter. And their drops weren't so obvious that they were intrusive or out of place, so well done!

OMGIKNEWIT *dramatic point*! You really made me question what the crap I was believing, but I held fast to this conclusion and I WAS RIGHT. I applaud you for making me even have to walk in circles in the first place, Darkin. You're really good at the skill of leading a reader to believe one thing and then going "Lol, silly reader" and pulling the rug out from beneath someone's feet. Love it. This ending, though sad in a way, is a nice close. Nathan is happy, Kristin is happy, everyone is happy and that is all that matters here.

Some little things I noticed that you might think about fixing:

Missing a quotation mark at the end of ["Where...?]

[ He[d ] think you meant [He'd] or [He had]?

Great work, Darkin. Thank you for sharing it with us!