| Reviews for Jaune of Hearts |
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zorro99 chapter 6 . 1/30/2019 I like how you're doing original things instead of making a straight novelization of the first game as well as how you're giving everyone something to do. However, I'm not really dure about making Ansem the Wise into Ruby's grandfather since it might undercut the Ansem, Seeker of Darkness reveal if Yang can just go, "That's not actually Ansem." Unless you're planning on that with Blake and reveal him as Xehanort early. |
M chapter 1 . 8/25/2018 I get people ship Pyrrah and Juane but she’s always babying him in every fanfic I see, no matter what it is all Juane had was a ‘dream’. dream's can be caused by many factors not just stress, and he was in Professor port's class which everyone sleeps in if it were Oobleck or Goodwitch I’d understand but port no! |
14 Forsaken Sons chapter 4 . 8/7/2018 Should've it be ninety eight dalmatian puppies to find. |
14 Forsaken Sons chapter 1 . 8/7/2018 This will be fun. |
Guest chapter 6 . 6/28/2018 I don't know what your doing for pairings, but I do hope for some Jaune x Blake. |
Guest chapter 6 . 5/11/2018 So Jaune x harem, who's in it? I can guess maybe all of team Rwby and Pyhra. Likely addition might be Yuffie and Velvet. Please add Ariel, maybe Alice, and most definitely Malleficent. Basically please give Jaune all the bitches. |
StrongGuy159 chapter 6 . 5/10/2018 Cool story continue please. |
UnholyDiver chapter 6 . 5/8/2018 Oh jeez, an Adam Taurus/Cloud Strife team-up? We in the Edgelord Olympics now. (Also, Blake reunion! Yay!) |
trestwho chapter 6 . 4/8/2018 And now we are fully caught up. I really enjoyed how you fleshed out Olympus Coliseum, or Olympia as it were. Same with all the references to Hercules. That is one of my favorite Disney movies and so seeing those brought a smile to my face. I like how you are straying from the game a bit more. No need to go 1 to 1 for everything. Expand a little, flesh things out. It will go a long way towards improving your story, in my opinion. I imagine that Broody # 2 was Adam? Makes sense, the edge lord he is. Hopefully Yang walks away from the next fight with both arms still attached. Regardless, I look forward to seeing the next chapter. Hopefully it comes soon. |
trestwho chapter 5 . 4/8/2018 I like how Blake is now working with DiZ. Gives her agency as well. I imagine that she is only going to show up every so often, with the main trio being Jaune, Weiss, and Yang? Also is a good idea to backtrack to Traverse Town every so often. Gives us, the readers, a chance to cool down a bit as well as slow the story down. The last thing you want is to rush the story. By the way, what ever happened to Sora, Riku, and Kairi? Do they still exist, as does/did Destiny Island? Or did they get 'killed' along with Destiny Island? Also, will Donald and Goofy be a part of the story in any capacity or are they confined to Disney Castle? I would imagine that they are conducting their own search for Micky and possibly even still with him. Either way, now they are off to Olympus Colliseum and to meet Hercules. |
trestwho chapter 4 . 4/8/2018 I really like how you had other Remnant characters pop up in different worlds. Was Velvet appearing in Wonderland a deliberate reference to the White Rabbit being a prominent character? Your writing is also improving as you move on, an aftereffect of more practice. A few spelling and grammar errors, but nothing really offputting. I can only imagine what other characters will show up in the other worlds. I can only guess that Neptune somehow landed in Atlantica, because of course the Huntsmen whose afraid of water would become a merman. Possibly Penny in Monstro with Geppetto and Pinocchio and Sun in Deep Jungle. Other than that, I have no idea. Can't wait to see who arrives where. By the way, how exactly are the worlds structured? Are they more like actual planets, with Jaune, Yang, and Weiss appearing in the approximate location of the keyhole, or are they not and are literally just like what the games show us? |
trestwho chapter 3 . 4/8/2018 Once again, great chapter. I really like how you had Weiss and Yang take the roles of Donald and Goofy, respectively. Gives the party of three more cohesiveness and makes Remnant as a whole more important. At the same time, I really like how you had Weiss and Yang remain better than Jaune in key P(heh) ways. I imagine that Weiss will always be a better mage than Jaune is, and with Yang being the one who can pilot the Gummi Ship makes her equally invaluable. None of them are mere set pieces meant to show just how awesome Jaune is. Thank you for giving the two Huntresses importance. By the way, I forgot to ask this earlier, what do you plan on Jaune's semblance being? Will it be the canon Aura Amplification, or something else? |
trestwho chapter 2 . 4/8/2018 And thus Beacon falls, a Volume early I might add. Once again, great chapter. I enjoy how you had all the main characters have their roles get set up in this chapter. Jaune got the Kingdom Key, Weiss and Yang got the Gummi Ship, Pyrrha has begun her fall to darkness, and Ruby's heart entered Jaune's, he just doesn't know it yet. Out of curiosity, how many people from Remnant actually survived. It sounds like only the people around Beacon, so I'm guessing at most about maybe 10,000 people, mostly Huntsmen and Huntresses in training and Ironwood's forces. Speaking of which, is he alive still? I like how you are having the Keyblade actually help Jaune gain skill at an unnatural pace. It certainly will help him catch up, but at the same token knowing Jaune, I imagine that he is going to eventually fall into the pit-trap of "I'm useless without the Keyblade". Not surprised Ozpin knows about Mickey. If anyone on Remnant would, it would be him. Speaking of which, is he still an immortal body-hopping Wizard like in canon, or as you have made a bunch of plans before that was revealed do you plan on not touching that? |
trestwho chapter 1 . 4/8/2018 This is honestly one of may favorite RWBY crossovers. What you and wolf are doing here is, in my eyes, something that is pretty unique. Having RWBY characters take the place of Sora, Riku, Kairi, Donald, and Goofy to do the plot for Kingdom Hearts hasn't really been done. Most simply have Sora or somebody else just arrive on Remnant, thereby treating it like any other world that Sora goes to. I have previously read this before, but now that I have an account I wanted to go through each chapter, starting with this one. I really liked how you made Jaune be the person who has the Keyblade. Of all the other characters in RWBY, he probably fits the role the best. Possibly Ruby, but at the same token she really fits the whole Princess of Heart thing that you have going on, so with that in mind Jaune having it suits him the best. I also really liked how you made the choosing of the different starting weapons, the Sword, the Staff, and the Shield, into an exploration of Jaune's character. I personally agree with your choice to have Jaune choose the shield due to what he has learned while at Beacon. Shows a nice bit of character growth for him. Ansem is as menacing as always. Out of curiosity, how do the RWBY villains rank up to him and the other villains in terms of power? I would imagine that Salem is probably along the same strength as say, Maleficent or something. |
Goldspark1 chapter 4 . 4/8/2018 Thanks for chapter 6. Really like the rock in the waiting room inside the coleicium. In the game, it was a great way to show your progress from where you first start your journey. How you first couldn't move it yet at the end where you went to multiple worlds and became stronger and even wiser (spells, knowledge, and lessons, etc.). So when you finally went back, moving that rock felt like a milestone. Great job of having Yang, even with her magic semblance, could not move it. Despite their power, their is room for improvement. Like the expansion from the game where the group goes to the merchants and actually meets people and describes what it looks like. The Greek dresses, the Hercules sandals, all of this makes it feel like a world. Bit disappointed that Jaune didn't recognize Blake's voice or similar attire. Faunus ears and feminine yet low pitch don't strike me as a voice you can easily forget. If she was part of a team he didn't know, they I can see it being true yet they live right next door from the other. Like how Jaune learned thunder from Zeus. It felt great world building from the movie and in this story. About your authors note, thanks for telling us why the weird update was sent out. |