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That was a huge info dump

Please write the next chapter already. Thank you very much. I really appreciate it and liked it a lot.

Dude,I am telling you,your writing style is very good ,it's lockdown now due to covid19,you must complete you must have some free time now?
Update this story if you ever get the inspiration to continue writing.
Cheers!

ahh I see I thought this story was familiar I actually somewhat read the first ch of pale horse.

an ... interesting story...
I'm not really sure what to think but I will bookmark it just in case of ur return to it.

And apparently you dont know the definition of the word "slut". Because you described three sluts, while claiming they are not sluts.

In one chapter it turned from slightly impressive to moderately retarded.

Damn. You do have a certain...gift, one might say, with descriptive writing. If only you paired it with the knowledge of proper English and good grammar...

damn awsome story are you going to continue with it? I love the way its working out

Great story. Please continue.

Of coarse she says young man because in your pea sized brain it makes sense right? Your making women look beyond help. If you can’t understand how to make a proper story ask for help, don’t just dawdle and masturbate to furries you peppermint cunt.

It's really interesting will you please update it if possible.

The first chapter reads too much like the "On a Pale Horse" because you legit just took things from it. I understand wanting to copy people who are successful that you like but that's literally plagiarizing. It's too close. The descriptions are too close and it's a shame. I'm not reading the rest of this because I don't support that and not do I support the people who read this complaining about the original. It's ok to take inspiration from someone but word for word is plagiarism and honestly not befitting of a writer and an artist. A shame. This is not an attack against you as a person but your writing so when you read this I hope you can make that distinction. As someone going into the music entertainment business critique is hard to take and please don't take this the wrong way but plagiarism is wrong and that's what you did because I just finished reading that one and it's fresh in my mind. I sincerely hope you read the original again and compare the first chapter to yours.

Great story so far. I like the interaction much more than in "On a Pale Horse". On a side note, the"guest" from the Apr. 4th posting probably masturbates to animai.