I've been reading through a few of your Fics and noticed a few reoccurring writing mistakes/things-you-want-to-avoid. Ben and Gwen are American. They do not use the word Mum, they use Mom. You use winced xxx eyes WAY too much, winced alone oft would suffice. Blinked is also a word, and you can also just say they closed their eyes. Breathe is a verb, breath is a noun. And I usually recommend that you reread before a post, as I also noticed times where a word looked like you let autocorrect do your sentences for you. I myself use a device with autocorrect, and its important to remember that it focuses more on what words you use commonly that are close by on the keyboard.

Great story. But i don't like putting kevin a bad guy

I wish you didn't make Gwen sound as weak as she is in this, she's a lot stronger than this she's not a scared little girl. But overall nice story so far

Man, you really need to clean this chapter (story?) up. I saw a lot of typos and incorrect words in the wrong places all over the place in just the first four paragraphs alone, to say nothing of the rest of the chapter. But, that aside, I will confess to having a weakness to Bwen stories, so I guess I'll just have to deal with it.

Ew! Gwen said thanks to her Nazi parents.

Making Gwen's father a Nazi was a stupid idea!

You made Gwen's parents into sadists and idiots.

Wow, you made Kevin an idiot and a racist. Not cool.

You need to work on your grammar badly.

You have a bad habit of using the wrong names and pronouns, and misspelling small words like you typed it in a hurry and didn't proof read.

That aside, the fact that you have her being attacked time after time, each near death, each before she has recovered from the last one, it's really annoying. She would have much more severe PTSD than what she shows given the situation. Its an interesting read, but you seem WAY too fixated on her being nearly dead. If she gets attacked again in the remaining chapters I will stop reading. You had already had Ben acknowledge the farmer being at that hospital, and he didn't do anything about it? Pretty sure if I knew a serial killer was at a hospital that my aunt worked at, I would have done something about it. Especially after bringing Gwen to the same hospital.

So i don't know if its over but i hope not good story a bit dark but that seems to be your thing.

Good so far, I look forward to reading more in the future.

this story is one of my favorites

what a shit story

more plz