Hope and denial are meeting in my heart, too...! What a lovely epilogue to a beautiful tale. You write a great happy ending.

This whole chapter made me sigh and smile and sigh again. Honestly, I have only praise for it. And gratitude, that you opted to share it. The characterizations are spot-on, here, from Lilith to Mordecai to Brick. The Bloodwing bit is a touching moment, and Talon's usurping of the title of Mordecai's animal partner is grin-worthy. Seeing everybody relaxed and relieved, if still a little bit imperfect, is such a charming way to leave our heroes. I hope more people find out what a treasure this story is, because it deserves to be known.

Thanks so much for sharing! I'm looking forward to more of your stories in the future.

I actually prefer this end for the villain. It's not drawn-out, here, he doesn't go into a new form, he just gets his comeuppance. It's a bloody little moment, but his evil doesn't deserve a graceful death scene. It's a great way that it happens, too, half by Brick's hand and half not.

The reunion is touching without being sappy, which fits well with this story. Brick's letting go of his quest, now that it's over, is a strong sign of what's to come for the team of friends. I often forget where this takes place in game continuity, especially when Roland isn't there, but it's neat to imagine the original team having their own little adventures while the after-group is gallivanting around Pandora running resource and fetch quests. :)

Of *course* I need to comment on this. This deserves more attention! It's the most mature (sophisticated, not necessarily "Rated M for") characterization and plot I've seen in this fandom (and, really, in any other). It reminds me a lot of a complex detective story, in many ways, with all of its mysteries and clues and adventure moments. And it's so much about the human heart. So many stories, especially fandom stories, forget that what really matters at the end of our lives is who we've touched, not so much what we've done.

Exciting and riveting stuff! A lot of the descriptions are downright lyrical, too. It's a great contrast.

I think I'd expected the Kindle reveal, in the back of my mind, because it didn't really come as a surprise. I suppose I didn't *want* to believe it, though. I wanted Brick's quest to end happily. In a way, the revelation offers some peace...and the freedom to exact revenge.

I've really enjoyed how Brick's grown to accept his animal over this last Book. The torment of its hovering presence offers some great high-tension moments in the earlier Books, but his acceptance represents a fuller maturity for the character.

Well done!

In a way, this was something I'd expected; in another way, not. I like that I've been kept guessing until now about the secret of the cellar. The lead-up is tense and quick, the follow-up even more so. It's the down-slope on a rollercoaster ride, headed for the end but with great feeling.

I've got a brief thought about Bool's voids, the moon, Lilith's phasewalk, and maybe even Fast Travel that I won't go into here because I'm not finished with the story, yet. Remind me to ask if I don't at the end. Mirroring terminology and description has started me thinking, though...

We haven't hit the last words, yet, but I have to say the story has been a journey well worth it, through all of its twists and turns. I hope it makes its way into a broader understanding of the Borderlands universe, because it links so much history and so many characters together in a way we're not allowed to experience in a first-person shooter. And, it's just that good.

Okay, I'm getting it, now. :)

Insanity borne from the desire to recapture the past is a neat motivational piece. It fits with this character, too. The flashbacks/steps on the curve (which is a great phrase; reminds me of Doctor Who) build the back story for us without wallowing through a lot of exposition. When I go back and re-read, I'll have to pay closer attention to the Lancer history bits in Book 1, to see what you do or don't mention there.

Such menace...but pity, too. Like an inevitable twisting of goodness, not quite to malice, but certainly unthinking and careless disregard for humanity. This is a very interesting move, because it's not so simple as a megalomaniac like a Handsome Jack that you just want to destroy. I mean, I want to stop the madness from happening, but there's a small part of me that gets where this villain is coming from. Nice work with balancing those sympathies with the necessary revulsion and disgust. :)

AAAHHHH! This cliffhanger is going to be the death of me. It is very easy to get into the world you've written. I especially loved the descriptions about the lab where the test tube people were. It wan't over detailed but guided the imagination enough to let me come up with my own view on the creatures. Very engaging! I can't wait until the next update.

Hm. It's short, yes, but there's lots to think about, here.

This chapter is full of starkly horrifying imagery, but it changes with Amanda. I like the way her dream-self changes, too, even in the short time we see her. The bit about the hair is striking. Is the she who cried their momma? Who went home? Emmett? The cellar is just Brick's version of Hell, I think, though I could be wrong. There's so much mystery and conflict created by a dreamscape that interferes with reality, that it's often difficult to know what's real and what's imagined. It's a good mystery, though. I'm just not smart enough to get it on the first read. XD

Danger, Will Robinson! :D

What a great adventure chapter. The imagery for the lab and creatures is creepy without being too distracting from our heroes' plight. They are in deep doo-doo, and that pervasive dread really holds throughout the chapter. Steady balance of mood, here, which is very, very good. There are teeny-tiny spots of respite - questions in the hall, the varkid with the puke - but there's no break to the mood. There's no real rollicking adrenaline rush, more like a pressing foreboding. I like it. It fits in this twisted scene.

Oh, that ending! What are you doing to me, with all these twists...!

Two bits: Take a second look at these sentences for some missing/extra words:
"The others piled against him..." and "He knew its bristling..."

I feel like you had a lot of fun with this chapter. Even though you say action isn't your strong point, these last few chapters have been a real treat. I think when you are concentrating on the story and not so much the logistics, it frees you up to have more fun, and that shows through. If I'm wrong, sorry about that. I've enjoyed these action chapters as much as the setup ones, though. This Book has been very, very strong, and I'm loving every bit of it.

The second half of this one really gave me chills. Great job with that monster - I was sitting here shuddering along with the four friends on my screen! You say action gives you trouble, but that fight with the mutant reads very well. Is that what the "He's still dead" line from the earlier chapter is referencing?

The opening fight with the Bloodshots has some very good moments, too. I like the way Brick and Mordecai have their conversation even while all the chaos is happening around them. I did notice in the back of my mind that the pace of those smaller skirmishes felt slower than the final one. I think because they're talking in longer stretches. It's not a bad thing, because the conversations add a lot to the interactions (and, they're just plain strong insights into their motivations and perspectives), just something to keep in mind.

This is purely a stylistic choice, but when the team heads into the bowels of the stronghold, there's a line - "They didn't talk." - that might have more impact if they do talk a bit prior to that. It's one of those weird balances of, How quickly and easily do I want to show them getting to their destination, and, How much do I want to immerse the reader with (potentially unnecessary) dialogue? For instance, the bit with "Roland periodically opened his HUD..." could stay as-is, or it could be a short dialogue piece where Roland articulates the same. Where the team sees the mutant, we're right there with them, experiencing that horror, because we're hearing it in their voices. Sometimes, a writer prefers to just speed through from point A to point B, but sometimes, it's good to let the characters talk their way through that journey, too. As I said, purely stylistic.

I really liked the Brick and Mordecai back-and-forth in the first section, and I love the dialogue in the lift. Lilith's lingering terror especially really comes through. The only typo that stood out to me was "He [needn't - need not] have bothered."

Very fun, and a great setup for next chapter. :)

Roland at his socially-awkward best! I love it. :)

The fight at the gate is a lot of fun - so much happening, and it's great to see the digistruct deck put to action this way, with Brick forgetting the order. (Can't tell you how many times that's happened in real life, for me.)

Only two little typos I saw: "A sleeping bandit guarded [t]he single gate," and "horde" is the spelling for crowd; "hoard" is a stored collection, like a dragon's hoard of gold. A spellcheck wouldn't catch either of them, so I understand how they could slip in. (I have to think about the difference between "rein" and "reign" all the time, personally.)

Great to see the full team back together again and working as a unit! I'm excited to see what adventures lie in wait inside. :)

The semi-awkward friendship scenes here really stand out. I've said it before, but the quality of humanity in these characters is some of the best I've read: no black-and-white, but distinguishable from a simpler comrade-in-arms only. Lilith's welcome home and Roland's somewhat clumsier offer of aid illustrate this very well. Nice seeing Bool again, too...though I hadn't made that connection of the cataracts and the moon until the mention of it, here. When I reread this story from the beginning, I'll have to pay closer attention to those little details.

The return to Mordecai (and that ice scene you'd hinted at before) is strong, too. Even in a fevered state, he still reaches out to Brick and tries to protect him. It's a beautiful commentary on the strength of their friendship and love. I especially liked the offhanded "Babe, I love you, but..." line, considering where we first saw these two in Book 1.

There's a darkness encroaching, faster, now, but the light between Brick and his closest loved ones provides a nice beacon of hope. Even with what could be waiting for them when they finally head out to find Amanda.

Nice!

I was going to leave this time to settle, but I can't. I love, love, LOVE this chapter! After last time's grim violence and heavier drama, the fight here feels almost refreshing. And seeing that big, beautiful girl(!) strutting her stuff has been more than worth the wait! She's a great addition (re-addition?) to the story, even if she doesn't show up again. The communication between her and Brick at the beginning is simply fantastic. Any of us who has been there with a loving companion will feel that deep connection and relate. Beautiful!

Really enjoy your Ellie, too! All the little banter bits between her and the guys - especially about their newcomer - had me smiling ear to ear. You write a fantastic Ellie!

A rather light-hearted chapter in comparison, but one I feel is worth it. We're sure to be heading into darker territory before too long, so it was great to have this little breather where Brick can center himself again. Kudos!

The title of this Book is very fitting, because, all the way through the second half of this chapter, all I could think was: Oh. Hell. YES.

That was a glorious comeuppance! The action, the tension, the chase and capture, it's all damn near perfect for this story. You fulfilled at least this one reader's desire tremendously, in gruesomely satisfying detail. The best part? I love that Brick stayed in control the whole time.

Great cliffhanger for this chapter, too! Two meet-ups I'd been waiting for, and I can't wait to see what happens next!

I wonder - is Mordecai's sickness just coincidence, or does the moon have something to do with it? With the growing cast, and the longer reach of the darkness, can one be certain of anything, anymore, here?

Nice view of Lynchwood! There are so many places we just run through in-game, it's great to see the town built up a bit in description. The callback to Frank made me a little bit teary-eyed inside...but it also made me curious if Brick will ever cross paths with his skag buddy again. ;)

We readers are a little bit spoiled by already knowing future events, but the reintroduction of Nisha is a neat twist. Man, I want to see Brick punch that bitch into the ground, though I doubt that will happen, given canon. (Though, maybe not. Canon's value goes only so far...)

The dialogue with Axton is *great*. We really get to see Brick's affection for Mordecai from another point of view, and it's a nice development that - at least with one outsider - their relationship doesn't have to be downplayed so much. It's also fitting that Axton would make the point about keeping your cards close to your vest, with his background as a husband. The only other person I could easily see giving that advice is Roland, but, given his standing with Brick, that's not likely.

A few little typos: "begun to take a [toll]," "the faces of buildings and bandits alike" (which is a great line), and "pushed Brick away with [a] frail, shaking hand." Also, be wary of your semicolons. They're used to link two separate but similar or related ideas ("The men by the station were right; the corner was impossible to miss.") Colons are used to follow up with descriptors, such as "...it was still Nisha the Lawbringer: the Hyperion commander who'd..." Otherwise, *solid.*

I await the developments with the sheriff with baited breath!

I've loved this whole entire series so far! I love this pairing so much