I love this story!

Loved it

I hope you do a mated story for beast I think you would do great. And I myself have always wanted Beast to have a lady love.

I love this story! And I thought that the smut scenes were well-written (coming from a non-virgin).

I would have loved to see more story development, if anything, to prolong the engagment of Kitten and Victor because that is primarily what I enjoy this story for. Seriously lol I really enjoyed this story - especially the dominance struggles and how consequences are doled out. I appreciated that you made mention of pack hierachy and would have loved to see more of that.

In my opinion, the deadline to finish the mating process really hinders story development because of how pronounced it is. Seven days to finish the process or the main character dies? I appreciate the drama of it but it does not leave much room for anything other than running as fast as possible to have sex and then the story is done.

I am not saying there is anything bad about it but I am biased and would have loved to see more experiences and development betwen Kitten and Victor. I love how you wrote them and I am left wanting to have read more about their beginnings. Scrapping out the deadline could possibly leave more room for more drama. More dominance struggles. More risks. More questions and answers.

Throw more curve balls at the characters! Graydon could have hunchmen trying to cause issues for Kitten - whether its stalking, threatening, kidnapping or trying to lay claim/mate her. It could be fun to have the main characters have no idea what the big picture really is and just throw them for loops. Its fun to see main characters slowly start putting the puzzle together because the picture changes a little more each time new information is revealed.

Drag the characters through the mud some more before having them on the same page of mating. There could be a lot of fun opportunities of touch-and-go to eventually build to that cement finish.

Anyways,

Awesome story!

:)

Nice! sad for the cubs but still. moving on together. Great!

I really enjoyed your story! I hope to see more from you soon. Cheers friend! -Twisty

This looks good!

Thos looks interesting. ..

Uhm sorry, I know that you mentioned being still a virgin (or at least you still were while writing the first few sex scenes), so I do understand that you couldn't have the experience to know this… but… uh, what's with all the cervix hitting?! I read that in so many sex scenes written by young/inexperienced writers. Seriously. That shit fucking hurts! For most women, when something hits their cervix too roughly, it can feel like a knife to the uterus, and/or as if the muscles of your pelvic floor are tearing.
Yes, there are some women who like this kind of pain; and yes, there are some women whose cervix can handle some gentle thrusting (and that *might* even feel nice in the heat of the moment, if done right!), but I can tell you that MOST women out there who had this experience would tell you that it's one of the most painful things (apart from childbirth obviously, haha). It feels like the worst period cramps you can imagine, but considerably sharper. It's crippling, because the pain spreads into your thighs and abdomen and along your spine… If it's really bad, you can't even move without further pain, and it feels like something's ripping your abdominal muscles inwards.

So, please, educate yourself! And don't trust every sexy-sounding thing you read in other (fan)fiction. It's just this silly fantasy about the man having a huge cock that doesn't fit into the tiny tiny vagina… ugh. *shakes head*

All right… I really had to get this off my chest. I hope you're not too discouraged.

Apart from all this, it's a nice little story to read while travelling, thank you.

Please update another chapter

make another chapter now

She gave him what for. :) I like it

Aww that is so sad.

I like the story but you could have maybe a little bit longer. Anyways is this the end of the story or what? Do let us know what the ending is and if this is not the ending please update soon and as always keep it coming

I had to go back and read the last chapter to jog the memory,,, you have done a pretty good job with the chapter :) Does this mean we should be expecting another update soon? :D