So... you wrote this for my birthday prompt about 6 years ago. Apparently I don't check my inbox even though I do come on here. Thank you for this! I love it! It's the perfect little story!

Whilst in detention Draco asked Filch what exactly was that large muggle looking device in corner of classroom. The one with an ominous Alpha & Omega symbol on it..
The caretaker told him that Arthur Weasley had confiscated it from a couple of very strange types; one with badly burned skin & really long robes, and another who seemed to have been partially transfigured into a gorilla. He'd sent to Dumbledore that morning to see if the headmaster could figure it out.

After Filch left Draco could swear he could hear ticking coming from the object? Curiosity got the better of Malfoy & he went up & put his ear to it..

.. just as the 500 megaton cobalt salted fission-fusion-fission device exploded in his face..

Very fortunately Hogwarts magically wardings & planar shielding managed to shunt almost all the energies into another dimensional plane & seal the rest in trinitite like magical glass.

Argus Flitch returned two hours later to find where the classroom doorway had previously been, a now perfectly smooth blue-black rectangle of polished obsidian like glass .. that was slightly warm to the touch..

"Fucking purebloods!" he muttered "Always trying something to get out of punishments!"

Hermione & everyone at Hogwarts soon forgot Draco. Hermione developed a meaningful relationship with another person - possibly Oliver Wood or maybe it was Susan Bones. Either way this universe was spared yet another dreary dramione drama...

"Oh bollocks!" Daphne cursed.
She should not have been idly holding her wand in general direction of Malfoy's groin, as with a scream ... these were torn from him
(_)_)::::D

Stunned at the sight of his tiny members, the girls left the room whistling innocently - leaving that blonde git to bleed to death.

I have read your other stories awesome. Love these dabbles.

This story should be called "Three shades of purple" lol
I loved it.

so stinking cute

Draco came round in a room that reminded him of hospital wing of Hogwarts.
He couldn't really move much. Glancing down he saw below his lower abdomen he was heavily bandaged. What in Merlin's name ...
'Good morning Mister Malfoy!' a very familiar bushy haired brunette 'nurse' exclaimed opening the door. The term 'nurse' Draco used only loosely in his head, as he doubted any actual muggle nurses would wear a uniform that short or THAT revealing.
Or made of those muggle materials that had no wizarding counterparts .. ah yes he remembered now latex, spandex and that PCV plastic stuff that Blaise was always raving on about.
The 'Nurse Danger' badge completed the bizarre spectacle. She was also ridiculously chirpy which wasn't normal for Dang .. , err, Granger.
'Those strong pain numbing potions will be wearing off soon' she stated.
'What potions?!' Draco said breaking his silence.
'The ones you had after your castration of course!' she smirked.
Malfoy junior was beyond horrifically aghast. Castration would mean a total end to the family line. All his surviving French cousins were females.
'Wwwhaart!' he managed to splutter out 'YOU HAVE REMOVED MY TESTICLES!?'
'OH, of course or NOT!' replied Granger. Draco breathed a sigh of relief. It had all been a hideous bizarre prank ..
'*I* didn't touch you. Hagrid did the actual operation - he's had plenty of practice on problem thestrals. And unfortunately he was a little heavy handed with the meat cleaver, kebab skewers & that rusty spoon" she continued with a bigger grin spreading "And it wasn't just your testicles - he accidentally removed your entire genitalia!' holding up a clear muggle bag containing some very familiar organs to Draco's face.
Totally speechless his hand shot to his wrapped groin - only to find it empty of contents.
'Perhaps you'll be less aggressive & nasty now?' she quipped and left, her shapely thong clad arse swaying as she did so.
Not that the former Slytherin school'boy' had anything left to appreciate that very sexy sight with.
The end (of Draco's marriage prospects).

Thank god for this drabble, it evolved into one of my favorite stories ever.

These drabbles are amazing! Who are you and why are you so good? I loved each and every one of the 100. Thank you so much 3 3 3

Was hoping this was expanded 3

This chapter was HILARIOUS. I literally burst out laughing at the lineOh, Drakey,” she said as she looked up from her anachronistic iPhone”

this is soo cute u should make a whole story out of this one ngl

I love this chapter! The scene in which Draco tells Hermione, that he will find her in any universe is so heartbreaking and heart affirming. And then they do!

This also made me realize McGonogall is definitely better than Dumbledore.

3

A beautiful piece. Wish there was more to see how it developed! Nonetheless, it was brilliant. Thank you!