Too many repeating words, too many complex distracting words, too much breaking the flow with name alternatives. Too short 'cooldown' between erections. Other than that, the action wasn't bad, dialogue was in place. And who the fuck's gonna clean the cum from that table?

Nice job, that was very sweet. I like how you portray the relationship, it's nice.

Wow! That was SO HOT! XD

I love those two!

Are you sure that was like your first smut? Oh my God I would've never guessed. That was amazing and sexy XD And you're first timer? Damn better than myself when I first started out lol. You should totally write more kinky lemons in the future! I enjoyed it.