I loved the plot twists... Please continue the story... You are an amazing writer!

I loved the plot twists... Please continue the story... You are an amazing writer!

I can relate to the 5th entry on your list at the beginning lol

WHAT ABOUT PIKACHU!? YOU CAN'T HAVE ASH WITHOUT PIKACHU! PLEASE BRING PIKACHU IN! PLEASE!

I saw it coming! XD

An interesting story so far i am eager to see what comes next. Hopefully Ash will soon learn the truth and Riley will have a good reason for abandoning his family and they will have the opportunity to make up for lost time instead of spending all their time being mad and feeling guilt about their different situations. I am happy with the way that Ash is growing and that he is being more responsible but he also needs to move beyond his anger or it will destroy him. good job

You said Silver won't be important until later. How important exactly? Nothing bothers me more than an OC with an important role in a story that has Ash in it. I think I can deal with Reiki so long as teaching is all he does, but Silver getting an important role will be too much. And before you say that he isn't an OC I would like to point out that he isn't from the anime.

Also, if Aura was supposed to be rare why are you giving it to so many people? The story's just starting and there are already four people that can use it. Five if you want to count Cynthia since apparently she's capable as well.

Lastly, the fact that Silver is a last minute addition has me worried. I don't think I've ever seen a "last minute addition" that doesn't cause major problems to the story down the road.

good chapter.
ash obtained an absol.
Seriously, naming riolu/lucario Zabuza sound really weird and doesn't suit the aura pokemon.

now we wait for Riley to tell ash he is his father prepare to see a lot of craters

You should pair ash with cynthia :)

Well good luck with Skyrim, I got it when it first came out and still playing. Not a lot like I used but it's one of those games that you'll never get tired playing. Especially when you know how to use nexus to mod it.
Good chapter.

good chapter.
fun how ash catch snorlax: too much stupid that no one thought about it.

I don't really like riolu name. zabuza name doesn't suit for riolu or lucario. it is more for a swordman pokemon like scyther and bisharp family.

Am I allowed to leave feedback? I kinda am the beta reader lol

Of course I can!

Anyways, I liked this chapter when I received it in gmail. Congratulations on your biggest chapter yet. Just so you know, Captain Insane (aka GameManiac, author of The Path of the Aura) uploaded two chapters totaling nearly 80,000 words a few weeks ago. There's a reason I used that name.

Sorry for that brief spout of nonsense.

Nice to see some backstory on Lucario and Riley meeting up. I think that was a long time coming. I also wonder if Riolu will have telepathic abilities when he evolves. Could be very interesting.

Besides this, there isn't anything for me to say that I've corrected myself or you already know. At this point, the only thing I can possibly assume is that when Ash learns of Riley's true past, it may either turn out to be very messy or alright, and Ash will be forgiving or something. Whatever the case may be, I am excited to read about it.

Well personally, I thought this chapter was really interesting. Especially the part where you say stuff about the partner Pokemon for Aura Users. Lucario, Togekiss, and Meinshao. Three non-Legendaries that can learn Aura Sphere by level up. That's a really good idea. I hadn't thought about that as a concept, making all three of them partner Pokemon and not just Lucario. I do feel like there was a lot of lost potential for dialogue in this chapter. You moved really fast through the material, even if it was interesting. As an example, I'll take the flashback with Riolu and Riley. I wanted to see more. I feel like you just cut that part off prematurely. I didn't get to connect with the situation as much as I would have liked. But with eight pages, I can see why you might have moved quickly from Pewter all the way to Cerulean and kept the flashback short. Not much to say, or maybe you were feeling like it was getting too long. Either way, it's fine as is. I do see character coming out through the description and that's what counts. And I am kind of obsessed with dialogue, being a theater student. Sorry if I seem confusing.

It's also really interesting that Ash is just skipping by gyms. I actually looked back to make sure you weren't contradicting yourself by doing that (and caught your change to the joke about Riley's bad sense of direction which I laughed really hard at because Santalune Forest and Viridian Forest are so similar) and you aren't, so good job with that. So other than the fact that you spelled Aerodactyl as Aerodactly once, this was good. I'll be waiting for more. Good job to both of you (yes I'm talking to you Soof49 :)).

good chapter.
anew pokemon.
interesting the warning ranking system for pokemon