"Jack I love you so much-kiss-kiss" said Annabeth

"I love -kiss-kiss- you to -kiss-" said Jack

...are you intentionally making this THAT cringe worthy? The grammar, the writing...just why?

10/10, Amazing punctuation, story was laid out so simply and amazingly, would recommend.

Great Idea for a story along with the plot but bad execution. I barely survived this long. you should get a beta reader.

It is Poseidon

Throw them in the Styx and let them burn for eternity. Then cut their heads off and make others eat it, boil their blood for over an hour! MUAHAHAHAHA

Hi there, back again, I forgot to make this point in my lat two reviews, but man, there were no fullstops at ll in the last two chapters. I actually paused writing this review to skim through this chapter and have found exactly two fullstops in the entirety of it, not counting the ones in the title or the author's note.

Back again, just posted my review literally seconds ago when I started this chapter, and what surprised me was that the first few thoughts Percy had were my exact same thoughts. I especially loved it When Percy made a point about how his fatal flaw was literally loyalty, and then the gods saying that they don't care, with Percy just replying with a "what", which coincidentally were my exact thoughts.

I'm also having a lot of fun writing this review.

Hahaha.

I don't know why but I can't stop laughing. Just finished reading the first chapter and boy was there a lack of punctuation. Also I'm kinda confused. Did Annabeth turn into Thalia? Because in the last few lines, I feel like Annabeth's name was replaced by Thalia's. Also Annabeth is really funny. She gets into a relationship with her ex-boyfriend's half brother, saying how his parents' existences were pointless, and then she becomes a completely different person after Percy shows her the ring, and she tries to win him back half-heartedly while failing spectacularly, but also expecting him to fall straight back into her arms, and when he asks her about why she thought that her dad didn't deserve to die, she says that Percy's parents were going to die anyway, as if mortals and demigods' life expectancy were lifetimes apart, which is true if they become a god, but that's extremely unlikely, and in every other case, their life expectancy should be way way shorter as there is a super high chance of them getting mauled by some monster, and then she makes the point about how her dad is different because he's, quite on quote, 'important'.

All in all, this story was strangely enjoyable for me so far due to the bizarre pendulum like tendency for the change in character personality.

Amazing story I loved the entire thing it is by far my favorite keep up the good work

yyyyyyyeeaahhh you can go to hell jack

Yes Percy it's your fault for being a complete retard. It's at least the fourth time they tried to use Alice against you, If you had a brain you would have act the first time they threaten her moron.

Why would Percy says that someone who participate in his mother murder is his favourite ? It's retarded.

Ugh that's so stupid. It is what ? The third time Percy said "next time I'm killing you" ? It's getting old, what the point of threatening over and over and over again the same thing if you don't act on it ?

So Annabeth cheats on Percy and one second later is in tear because he broke up with her. Thalia is happy to torture Percy's family and one second later is in tears because he is angry at her.
That made no sense, your characters have no consistent behaviour.

NICE STORY! I'm liking it!