I look forward to the rest of this story. I couldn't see any errors, it looked well written. I think you've done a good job.

Ermagersh, epic story! I love, love, love where this is going! It was so immersive and interesting that I couldn't stop reading. Nicely done!

Your writing is so good, you're truly talented. I cannot wait to see what awesomeness this story brings, keep up the good work!

Keep writing