come on dude! This fic is amazing! When do you update?

thank you

Not much of an ending

Y u no update

Cool chapter five.

Is this a different timeline for Violet?

Great chapter, can't wait for the next update!

Not bad, but I have a feeling that you put more care into writing a Wish to Disappear than this. The dialogues seem rushed, in the decision-making and in the way information is passed on.

For example:

"And if she really wanted to steal Mami's territory, she wouldn't have tried to warn Mami back at the hospital before she-"
"You didn't tell me about that."

This looks like Sayaka instantly understood, absorbed and processed exactly the message Madoka had in mind based on just these few words. More realistically, Sayaka would be /surprised/. Maybe even ask for clarification/details. I imagine you didn't want to elaborate because the reader already knows all this, but still... it kinda reads like the characters have read the script and everyone knows where the story is going, so they're just rushing through the motions.

This was very interesting

...uh, okay. Not sure why you decided to make an even worse ending than canon, considering the premise of the story, but it's your right, I guess. I feel compelled to mention that if I had known it would end like this at all, I'd never have gotten into the story to begin with. It's just pointless-for starters, Sayaka and Kyousuke are doomed anyway, as Gretchen will consume the whole world in short order, and Sayaka has zero hope of even slowing that down. Homura's already gone to start a new loop. So really, Sayaka and Kyousuke surviving as long as they did was pretty much moot, and in the end even less than nothing was achieved (after all, it just made Homura even more jaded and give up on Sayaka entirely. Even for future loops. Which is a really shitty ending).

It'd be one thing if Sayaka was, somehow, brought into the time loop with Homura, so that the story would have meaning even if they were unable to stop Walpurgisnacht this time and "this version" of Kyouko, Madoka, Hitomi, and Kyousuke would disappear as a result. That'd allow for an interesting (and still hopeful) continuation to the story, even if you decided to end the actual fic there, it'd be better to leave it ambiguous on a much more hopeful, meaningful note.

Madoka... Kyoko...
I always wondered what the fight against Kreimfeld Gretchen would be like.

Cool chapter four.

Kyouko's... NOOOO!

...

pfff.

dat ending.

Okay this whole chapter was rather WAFFy, though Kyouko spilling her life story like that was a little out of the blue. But dat ending. :P

It's nice to see someone who isn't treating Hitomi like pond-scum.