I LOVE THISSS!

So here be me after a long absence with fire and determination to support Tsos even if it's post-event.

So it seems we have some Stockholm Syndrome in the works here. Great approach to Renzo in the way he approaches things and how his innards may, or may not be, completely different from his outers. My sympathy is with Izumo fairly early on, especially because I really want her to hope for a total and victorious escape, and it seems like she's given up on that. Unless she's just as two-faced as Renzo and is willing to play on his desire for affection so she can better engineer her own escape. Also, I really dislike relationships that develop because one character has been essentially under siege by another character and then decides to surrender without resolving the issues they were fighting about in the first place. Renzo reminds me of Andy Bernard of The Office, "Every success I've had, in life, and with the ladies, has come from my ability to slowly, and painfully, wear people down."

He also seems like a method actor, and we've had some examples of how that approach can send an individual off the deep end.

I'm a bit in conflict over the end, because I think you CAN decide to love someone or simply decide to behave and believe a certain way and let your behavior and willpower make your decision the reality. People actually can change especially if they want to put in a concerted effort -though beliefs don't change objective reality. At the same time, this change that the characters are deciding to make is not necessarily a good thing. In fact, I feel like they're embarking on a dark illusion that's going to leave them drained or broken. Or, even if it does become true, I feel like the foundation the whole relationship is built on is eventually going to bring everything crashing down.

Anywho, intriguing take on the prompt, and your exploration of some of the more bent and broken aspects of humanity were quite thought provoking.

I absolutely loved this entry. I'm actually a huge fan of angst, even if it manages to rip my heart out and crush it into a million tiny pieces. In fact, that's what makes it even better.

I could really sense Renzo's conflict throughout this entire piece. After a certain point, he couldn't tell whether his feelings for Izumo were real or not - it's similar to what I attempted to do with Shiki in my entry, but you executed it much, much better. I was actually expecting more towards the end, so when it ended I actually thought, "What, that's it? I wanted more :("

Definitely one of those pieces I will find myself re-reading whenever I need a nice, healthy dose of angst. Keep up the great work!

... 'Angsty', yes you certainly did :P
Stories like this instil a sense of hopelessness and pity in me, because the ending leaves me thinking, "What the HELL, NO; THIS ISN'T RIGHT. FIX THIS. IT'S NOT OVER YET."
Nevertheless, that feeling is a good feeling in the sense that the story was well-written enough to give me the feelz in the first place.

You know what? I feel out of energy now. Srsly. Good job.
XD

Basically, you did an excellent job in... Yeah. 'Death comes to you all'.
Wow, I'm seriously down now, what even.

Looking forward to your next work... Or not...
...

#ApathySyndrome,
-X

Oh, I like this very much. Angst can work quite well if it's done right, and I think your approach for this prompt was creative and well-thought-out. Despite not being familiar with the characters, I can clearly understand just how 'contrived' this romance might be. The ensuing despair contrasts especially with the happy/funny/ridiculous conceptions of contrived romance, and aren't there two sides to every story? Quick thing to point out - you'e missing a 'he' on the second to last line. Sorry for the random nitpick.

I really like how you point out the ambiguity of the 'mask' Renzo wears. It's fascinating to think that reality/pretend can blur to that point to where willing something to be true makes it so. (i.e. Renzo on contemplating his declaration of love) And the ending is perfect - the way it leaves us with a moment built on sheer willpower of our characters alone only serves to make you wonder, well, what happens next, in a reality that both of them must inevitably face? Lovely work, and good luck to you for Week 3's prompt!

It's a good thing I was sitting on the ground when I read this, because getting back up again after being gut punched like that would've been much harder with a fall added to the mix.

It's... well written, that much is certain. Your form is immaculate and your idea comes off naturally. Making the contrivance be an in-universe occurrence as opposed to a fourth-wall-style slap on worked well for you. It's just... kind of heavy, y'know? You paint a really good serious atmosphere that's nowhere near laughable in any respect. The desperation, the hurt, the bitterness, it all comes across very well. Given week four's prompt, I'm legitimately worried about what's going to go down now.

Way to be different though, this definitely breaks the mold and creates a two way contrived romance in a believable way; Because, as shown here, apparently being contrived doesn't necessarily mean being impossible. Just... that it shouldn't happen.

At any rate, you successfully gave me a very concerned frown. Good job(? I'm really not sure what you were shooting for...). Really though, if nothing else, the strength of your writing really shines in this piece. May it be so for the next as well.

Looking forward to the Tea Party,
-CG

HOLY SHIT YOU DID NOT. My phone beeped and I saw your name pop up and I was like oh it must be your one shot and I was like let's read the summary and then: 'oh no...is this' -Shima comes in 'IT IS'. My god damn heeaaart. OTL

No but literally I used to casual ship Izumo and Shima and it's exactly like you said where I was so happy he came to save her and then BOOM traitor alert. My brain is weird because I ended up shipping them even more because I was like 'oh my god what if this is a Shima actually started really liking her!?' And then you wrote this fic and I'm so done now.

Ahem moving on to the actual fic I'm sure by reaction you can tell that I very much am in love with it. And I would just like to say you portray Shima in a way that rips my soul and yet I can still find it so very believable. Izumo' character is just super spot on and his analysis of jer character is even better.

Excuse me while I go sob in a corner full of angst. (I mean like to think my entry had a bit of angst at the end but this was like killing me slowly).

- Dina