You need to rewrite this story because it makes no sense. You're leaving to much information out of this story and skipping to far ahead in some places in this story with no explanation for it. To put it simply this chapter didn't make a lot of sense.

After Hyper wrote this awful crappy chapter, Celestial Glowhead said: "Those are some pretty shitty texts, what other awful mistakes do you make?" To which Hyper thought "let's see, I have an awful grammar and a horrible writing style."

After Hyper thought, Celestial Glowhead said "Those are some pretty horrible grammar and writing style, what other writing sins you made?" To which Hyper thought "I can go a whole chapter without anything remotely interesting happen, which I'm bad at using prose, which I spam the word which and after, after Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze does anything, after I always say after and after I say Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze's full name for everything after Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze does dumb shit, after I write an awful with Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze which Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze breathes, which I describe every damn thing with an after after I started this god awful fanfic about Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze, which i dont feature Sonic at all, after I ignore every review, which im stupid and my fans are even worse after they press favorite on this fic, which I wrote a crossover between Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze and Sonic Maurice the Hedgehog, which i dont feature Sonic Maurice the Hedgehog, after I write chapter two, which chapter two is ass, after i spammed after and which and i after and which."

O_o dude why the fuck do you keep this up if you won't be willing to try and learn about good writing, prose and gramnar? This is so damn stupid I lose brain cells just by reading and reviewing but I still do it because it's what a good reviewer does, UNLIKE CERTAIN GODDAMN MUMBLING FANATICS WHO PRAISE AND WANK EVERY FATHER FUCKING CHAPTER OF EVERY SHIT FIC FROM THIS UNWHOLY BONAFIDE BAD AUTHOR! JESUS CHRIST, PEOPLE, STOP BEING SO DAMN BLIND, YOU DON'T HAVE TO READ THIS TEXTUAL ABORTION OF A CRINGE FEST JUST BECAUSE IT SAYS NARUTO! IN FACT, SCREW Y'ALL AND YOUR CULTURAL GENOCIDE, TOILET PAPER OF THE UNIVERSE! UGH!

THERE, I said it. Feels good. Sorry if I offended anyone, I hate doing this but it was necessary because the amount of snowflakes and conformist bitches in this section is off the charts. Naruto deserves better, this site deserves better and WE, the readers, deserve better. If you have any semblance of dignity, you'll be a good boy and delete this shit before you keep embarrassing yourself further. You could delete every single fic of yours and you'd be doing us a favor.

Very confusing. Might have potential if it was broken down better.

Dude, your writing skills need a LOT more work. You seem to use a copy and paste method for writing dialogue. Here's a bit of advice. If it's been said before in the chapter, chances are that if you say it again, it's going to be awkward to read, thus needs to be changed so it's not repetitive. Makes for a better story in the long run.

cant wait for new chapters because i love this story

Not forest of death

If you will not listen to people when they give you advice then stop writing stories.

Awwwwwsooooooome!

You're an idiot and a filthy Kishimoto lover, fuck off and die.

I like the way you had Naruto stop Mizuki.

Me gusta

I like the way you had Naruto end up with the atmor of the Sage of the Six Paths.

chapter 2 he already asked to join the academy and the 3rd already said yes and let him go to his clans village as well tell naruto who his parents were I'm so confused

What happen to the chapters?

its too worked out no action no fucking nostalga that im looking for so take this criticisme and stick it up your ass