TKKU23SKJOU4F1Y2NCIDMML6FU CU! DEATH TO CRITICS!

ooooooooooooo demon butler blushes?

Wow... thats *Clears Throat* that is exquisite. well done.

its so good

I loved it

How come the just randomly go like 'Oh yeah she can just get found somewhere and now POOF! She a maid' she should not be allowed to stay but then she offers to be a maid and they let her stay.

Just asking but the main character (us) didn't tell Bassy that her parents were killed, how old she is, that someone was trying to kill her and she hasn't shown very much personality on the couple of sentences she said. Love your story continue

I have only read the first chapter but I edited it so it would have I's and you's switching there are two versions the reader one at the bottom and a random name i made up at the top just a bit longer of the chapter and more detail. If you would like me to do others/ if you want to use it please contact.

First P.O.V:

I didn't know how much longer I could run already I had run at least ten minutes but I had to get to my destination the bridge. Suddenly I could see the outline and I ran faster, knowing he was near, his knife bloody with my own parents blood.

The land beneath turned from grass to pavers and I heard the clacking of my shoes. His joining moments later I turned glanced at him then jumped. Cold water rushed into my open mouth instantly I snapped it close and started trying to get to the surface but in the fast running water I was tossing and turning.

Never knowing which way was up my ankle hit what was probably a rock on the bottom before my head followed my mouth opened again the tiny amount of oxygen I had left was gone darkness clouded the little vision I had.

Light came through my closed eyes as strong arms pulled me from my half put and half in situation with the water. Had he found me? Maybe it was a kind noble, hah who am I kidding there for one are no kind nobles and the chances of my parents killer was very unlikely.

So I kept my eyes shut dreading opening them but using the logic ‘if I can't see you, you can't see me’ although seeing as I had been lifted out the water I had obviously been seen. I opened my eyes slowly a pleasant surprise awaiting my eyes a lovely sight for my ‘sore eyes’.

A tall man with crow like black hair, seemingly wearing a tailcoat as a butler would, a pristine white shirt and black trousers. I stared at the handsome being standing in front of me, at loss for words other than an extremely clumsy “Wh-who are you?”.

He smirked, bowed, answered my question in a seductive voice “I am Sebastian Michaelis, butler of the Phantomhive manor.” and left me speechless. Much too flabbergasted by his deep and seductive voice and stunningly good looks. Wait a second did he say Phamtomhive like Ciel Phamtomhive owner of the Funtomhive company I gawked. “And may I ask who are you?” He continues.

Regaining most of my composure I manage to stammer out “I'm Sarah, Sarah Fluenski.”.

“My, what a pretty name come, you shall be cleaned up at the manor.” I nod and try to stand up, but fall down again in agony pain erupting from my ankle “What is it Miss Fluenski?” Sebastian asks in alarm catching you again with his strong and probably muscular arms.

“My foot I hurt it a but when I jumped into the river.” I reply I may have been broken but it's better to under estimate than over and seem like a wuss or sook.

“Well then, I shall have to carry you.” Sebastian says formally and I could swear it was in a devilish way. He proceeded to pick me up bridal style I look up at his face and notice he had the faintest blush too how extremely interesting.

Reader version:

You didn't know how much longer you could run already having run for at least ten minutes but you absolutely must get to the bridge. Suddenly you could see the outline of it and began to run faster, knowing he was near knife bloody with my own parents blood.

The land beneath turned from grass to pavers and you heard the clacking of your shoes. His joining moments later you turned to glance at him then jumped. Cold water rushed into your open mouth instantly, you snapped it close and started trying to get to the surface but in the fast running water you were being tossed around.

Never knowing which way was up your ankle hit what was probably a rock on the bottom before my head followed my mouth opened again and the tiny amount of oxygen you had left disappeared, darkness clouded the little vision you had left.

Light came through your tightly closed eyes as strong arms pulled you from my half put and half in situation with the water. ‘Had he found me?’ you asked yourself maybe it was a friend or a poor person looking for money or maybe a kind noble, hah who am I kidding there for one are no kind nobles and the chances of it being my parents killer is very unlikely.

You mused but still, so you kept your eyes shut dreading opening them but using the logic ‘if I can't see you, you can't see me’ although seeing as you had been lifted out the water you had obviously been seen. You opened your eyes slowly a pleasant surprise awaiting them, it was a lovely sight for your ‘sore eyes’.

A tall noble man with crow like black hair, seemingly wearing a tailcoat as a butler would, a pristine white shirt and black trousers stood over you. You stared at the handsome being standing in front of you, complete at loss for words other than an extremely clumsy “Wh-who are you?”.

He smirked at you, bowed, answered your question in a seductive voice-“I am Sebastian Michaelis, butler of the Phantomhive manor.” and left you speechless. Much too flabbergasted by his deep and seductive voice and stunningly good looks. Wait a second did he say Phamtomhive like Ciel Phamtomhive owner of the Funtomhive company you gawked. “And may I ask who are you?” He asked continuing.

Regaining most of your composure you managed to stammer out “I'm (y/n), (f/n).”.

“My, what a pretty name come, you shall be cleaned up at the manor.” You nod and attempt to stand up, but fall down again in agony, pain erupting from your ankle “What is it Miss (l/n)?” Sebastian asks in alarm catching you again with his strong and probably muscular arms.

“My foot, I-I hurt it a bit when I jumped into the river.” You replied although you knew you may have broken it but it's better to under estimate than over and seem like a wuss or sook.

“Well then, I shall have to carry you.” Sebastian says formally and you could swear it was in a devilish way. He proceeded to pick you up bridal style you looked up at his face and noticed he had the faintest blush, too, how extremely interesting.

Omg umm...im blushing...Ah! THAT WAS AMAZING! BEST STORY OF 2016! DAMN STRAIGHT!

OMG YAS XDDD

It's ok

Really good story but the back and forth from 'I' and 'you' when it seems to be first person is terribly confusing and a little annoying. Otherwise I very much like the story so far. ] (on ch. 3 at the moment)

PLZ UPDATE

Ah, too bad little anon. The idiot broke the rules, they got caught, and reported, and are still being reported. People have a right to complain when someone violates a rules, it's only fair, They should have broken it in the first place, and so they were reported. Just because their are a number of stories out their like it, doesn't mean they haven't been reported, or it's a case of they have yet to be, but I can assure you that people like the idiot here do get stories removed, and accounts either suspended or deleted.

So, go suck and egg anon, and learn to respect the rules. Or, are you that retarded that you can't? Hm..

You people are so god damn bitchy it's retarded. There are so many story's like this and if you don't like get the hell off of this web site. Because I bet there are thousands of people who don't give a damn and want you bitchy people to just back the hell off.

Ps. I like this story so haha bitches please talk to the ass.. Stupid complainers.