Um, I'm too stupid to get the storyline. Most angst does that to me. ;

Its sad, and sweet. But I don't quite follow it either ... Good story though!

~Chikory

This is just so sweet and so sad. Another great story from you.

Good story. Big twist in Little story sort of thing: it really works.

"She still sees him, doesn't she?" - Right there, one of the best lines I've read recently. Slips the reader all they needed to know, in the best of the Show- Don't Tell tradition.

One thing: generally, you should make a new paragraph when the topic or subject changes. An easy way to tell this is if someone else starts speaking. This would make it easier to read your stories. Beyond the sheer mass of text, it disrupts the flow (for me) when the focus changes abruptily like that.

That's so...so...SAD! Poor Benjy! Poor Sharona! Poor Monk! WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

-RianaRogue

I like it, but I'm not quite sure what it's about? Were they in a fire and Sharona and Benjy are gonna die or something? Please write more.