omg my heart that was so good but so sad at the same time amazing and this fanfiction is really old!

I am sorry but I cannot stomach this fic. I cannot decide which is worse. Mary Sue fics or anti Mary Sue fics and if you try to hate me for not liking Mary Sue Bashing I will send some Wargs after you and these wargs will be equipped with fire arrows and heavy armor upgrades! Woo hoo!

*Presses the Howl move*

And what the hell is canon? I recall a printer of that name before but I do not know how it is applied to fanfics.

Also why don't you do the war chant that is in the Battle For Middle Earth game that powers up the Orcs?

I didn't know they were running? What's the prize for the orc that gets first place?

At first I ws hoping this was going to be a real fic but this is an obvious joke fic which you should've warned. WHY isn't there any decent Isengard fics that isn't a joke fic or a one shot?

DAMN THE POWERS THAT BE!

One last thing. How many transistors would it require if the Mines of Moria door (whatever the heck it's called) used them? Would it require a whole room full of them?

It would be so neat if the Mines of Moria had electricity and transistor technology. On YouTube somebody made a realistic weather spoof of Middle Earth complete with a green screen has Tolkien sort of made a basic climate system for the kingdom.

The Dwarves main concern was not what the weather was doing outside (since they live under a mountain) but what the water levels are doing on the inside like if there is a heavy snowpack on top of the White Mountains and it melts real fast would be very concerning while the Elves that live in the trees there main concern would be high winds that damages structures and heavy wet snowfalls that weakens tree branches.

I know that the Elf Lords have some kind of ring that protects them from the harshest weather but on occasion I think the strongest storms would briefly penetrate the shield.

And yes Gimili is my favorite character. Elves are actually very much racists and the reason Dwarves seem like a bunch of Ego stuck ups if that's what you think is because they have gone thru hell and back and only by bonding together have they survived so far without government help.

When you think about it it is very amazing how the Dwarves survived going to hell and back as one bad Dwarf doe snot mean they are all bad so it goes both ways! :)

If I am an evil socialpath for liking Dwarves then so be it! I am a proud socialpath!

Yep! A typical Liberal with no clue of life other then what her teachers tell her and the *Liberal arts* classes which is actually the *Easy* way out of doing classes that require thinking and understanding how economics actually work so you won't vote to be a welfare slave.

Note. All I said was in jest as there is nothing wrong with welfare if you truly need it but the government ran system and big corporations make it so a lot of people abuse the welfare system. You won't believe how many people try to use Welfare that instead of buying basic needs they go off and buy drugs wrecking their minds even further till they are nothing but filthy Orcs.

In the Battle for Middle Earth game Mordor Orcs are actually free when you build in Orc Pit if you choose their side either in Campaign or Skirmish mode! Orcs fly free!

Reading is for losers and little kids! Not for cool, mature adults! Like me!"
And with that, she had flounced off to download half-naked pictures of Orlando Bloom.

Thank you for a good chuckle that gave me :)
Borys

Wow. Very original idea, well executed. Good job avoiding all the fanfic cliches. You get massive kudos for writing this.

Hey, I wasn't expecting that summary of events at the end but it was a pretty interesting wind-up. Some usage of present-tense in amid the usual past-tense was weird, but otherwise clean.

And that's that. My world is a little bleaker now. Azrat is dead. [mourns]

Wow. Took a real turn for the weird at the end there.

...in a way I feel bad about the ending of this story. I know it was meant as satire but I became invested in the characters. Well. Invested in Azrat, at any rate.

Aw. Azrat.

...now HE deserves cuddling!

"Secondly, several people have expressed severe amounts of wrath and overall intense displeasure at my choice to remove the Fellowship from the storyline. I assure you that the canon is perfectly safe, that I know exactly what I am doing, and that it was all Amy's fault."

Drat. I *had* hoped that they were all dead: it seemed a dramatic and interesting choice, not one that many other authors dare to do. But I guess your statement doesn't necessarily mean I'm wrong. Just have to keep reading, I guess. Oh well!

I know I'm writing a review in 2010 for a story written seven years ago, but I had to pop up and say that I was reading and enjoying it. I've seen another story with a similar premise that you might enjoy as well: "Transformation" by Elf Cakes, though in that one the wanna-be Sue becomes a (male) Uruk and chooses the name Targash. Because (s)he was on the spot and could only think of the name Shagrat backwards!

I've always felt that orcs, as with all literary 'villains', were unfairly treated. That an entire race can be portrayed as uniformly and irredeemably evil is rather ridiculous and bigoted (even though they are a fictional species it never-the-less seems unjust). It is refreshing to see the orcs given some of the multidimensionality they deserve