Thought ruby was gonna get IT hehe. Oh well

Lol what

Hope you are still alive man or gal

I love this story! I really hope you're planning on continuing it. :)

wow, it really is dark...

This story is interesting, but I'm not sure what it has to do with RWBY, besides some character names. Why not go further, like saying it's the Atlas Empire that's attacking? Why not give Ruby a scythe or some other polearm?

this is actually pretty good

Quite interesting, I look forward to where you take it whenever your inspiration returns or your IRL issues end whichever is the reason. In either case, Good Luck!

This seems like a really interesting concept. You should continue.

I would like to see how this progresses, and how Ruby can survive someone who can freeze her with a thought.

Looking at your story so far (I literally have only just read this story) I think you have quite a bit of potential and experience (have no IDE if you do either lol) I see that you've only just began the story and I'm currently co-writing editing correcting peoples othe mistakes for about 5 or six stories cause I'm an iPhone 4s user I can't actually write anything without going on a long and confusing trip of documents e-mails and re writing several times so where in going with this is if you ever need a co-writer or someone to correct some stuff just ask and I'd be more than wiling to help please take this offer seriously yours sincerely The Withering Rose

I like the story so far. I hope you continue it.

awwwwwwwww thanks :)

I think that this is actually a fairly interesting concept. However while reading I am constantly reminded of the book Legend by David Gemmel. The details and characters are obviously different, but the same general idea of huge army, small city or fortress, and a cruel but intelligent leader. Either way good job and keep it up.

Not a good writer you say, I can only imagine how amazing your perception of a good writer would be.

I'm not entirely sure how much of this world you've done extensive research on and how much you've just made up on the spot, but it seems pretty damn good to me.

Obviously there's ton of potential and you can't go wrong with a plot line such as this, so I'm expecting big from this.

I'm giving back the seal of approval because you deserve it more.