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Haine talking a lot in reality he said very little in this chapter. XD
Just a lot of thoughts that were going through his mind, of course it was OOC, but the situation also ain't what you would call average in the DOGS world. But the way you made them like the original and at the same time completely different (the embrace) simply genius.

I admit it is truly an alluring story.
I was missing a little of the hound's feedback, but I am guessing you have lot's of his comments conserved for the next chapter (The rude awakening). XD
All in all not a bad chapter the length aspect is tearing at my soul though.

I do wonder if this dream is her standard dream or something that was born because of the kids presence in her life? Maybe even a hybrid, uuuuu I can't wait.

Also if you want to make it a dogs story then a fight or two will need to come eventually, but for now it's pretty good like it is, you are building the story at a good pace. (I hate fast paced stories!)

Also thank you for the update.

Enjoy writing and people will enjoy reading your story.
Regards, spy lockout

Ok so I normally dislike fanfics with OCs because it takes away from the original character, but so far I am totally LOVING this story!
I really can't wait for the next update!

Holy shiz.

Suddenly a wild epic story appears out of nowhere.
I am a great fan of Dogs: Bullets and Carnage, but this is completely another level all together then some Fan Fictions I read of Dogs.
Suddenly adding the mother version of Naoto, simply genius idea. I am interested in where you are going with this story. Can't wait till I see, how they will interact with one another from here on.
The children seem interesting, slightly overpowered but, hey.
And the dog, that is just there to push the story forward (or should i say both of them?XD)

Your writing style is pretty good and the story itself is already sucking me in, so thumbs up. Looking forward to the next update.

Have fun writing and others will have fun reading.
Regards, spy lockout