There are things in Dean's life that he never talks about. Events from his past that he ignores; or better yet, pretends never happened in the first place.
Horrific things. Incidents that would make any 'normal' person cringe. Most occurrences would at least cause a tremor of turmoil to run rampant around someone's mind, in other cases it would be worse; something more permanent.

The time Dean spent at Sonny's home for boys wasn't one of those things.

Sure it had been hard, an environment that most kids definitely would not be exposed to. But going back there now, seeing the place again, seeing Sonny again, it hadn't been hard in the way that one would have expected.

Dean could remember quite plainly the two months that he'd spent on that farm. The friends he'd made, what he managed to achieve in the short space of time within school, the wrestling, Robin.

It had been hard because it wasn't supposed to be the place that made him feel so wanted. It wasn't supposed to be where he felt included, as if he could achieve anything and live his life as a normal kid. But that's exactly what it was. It was the first place that he managed to feel as if he was making something of himself, fitting in, with someone around to tell him they were proud.

Driving out of town now, the old farm house once again framed in the Impala's rear vision mirror, Dean couldn't ignore the pang of wonder that plagued his mind of 'what if?' What if he hadn't left Sonny's that night when his dad returned, beckoning for his presence. What if he'd refused his old man and gone to the stupid school dance? Would John have ever come back for him again?

Dean glanced over at his brother when he saw Sam pushing himself further back into his seat and resting his head against the window.

He smiled softly to himself. Who was he kidding? There had never really been any choice; only Sam.

Dean drove contently as his brother's light snores began drifting from the sleeping form beside him. It didn't matter how many times Sam stated that he was feeling back to normal, the ease at which he now managed to fall asleep still always put Dean's mind at unease, his thoughts immediately drifting to the angel residing within.

The sound of Dean's ringtone pulled him out of his wandering mind, his teeth unlatching from his lip where they'd been gnawing with anxiousness. With one hand still tightly gripping the wheel, the other fumbling in his pocket for the insistently buzzing device before the high tone woke his brother, Dean paid no mind to the unknown number flashing across the screen and pressed the slim phone to his ear.

Dean kept his voice low, "Hello?"

"Dean?"

"Cas?"

"Yes." The relief that Dean was now accustomed to feeling whenever he managed to hear the sound of Cas' voice, discern that he was still okay, flowed its usual course. "Are you alright. You sound strange."

"I'm fine, Sammy's sleeping," Dean grinned as he fixed the phone more tightly against his ear. "What's up?" Immediate concern grew when Cas remained silent, "Is everything alright?"

"Somewhat."

Dean's grin began to fade, in contrast to his rising panic, "What's that mean? What's wrong?"

Dean had to strain his hearing to catch Cas' mumbled response, "I might be in the hospital."

"What?!" Dean's grip tightened around the wheel beneath his fingers and his eyes flickered briefly to Sam as he flinched at the outburst but Dean paid it no mind, thoughts of rabid demons and anguished angels attacking his vision, "What the hell happened?"

"I had an accident at work. These people are telling me I have a concussion and will not allow me to leave the premises." Cas' tone began to grow from its hesitance, turning into irritation, "However I feel perfectly fine. I wish to leave and they will not allow it."

Dean rolled his eyes at Cas' petulant tone, his grin sliding back into place, "You probably told them you had no one to watch over you for the night. They're just worried you'll pass out or something."

Dean heard Cas huff, "I am fine."

"They're doctors Cas, it's their job to make sure you're okay." Dean missed Cas' next sentence as he went back to mumbling, "What was that?"

"I don't like it here."

Dean chuckled, "No one likes hospitals Cas."

"They are rude and have insisted on my consumption of some kind of drug."

"Probably just morphine or something. They'll let you out soon, I promise."

"Come and get me," Cas demanded more than asked.

"What?"

"They will release me if I have someone to 'watch over me' as you say, come and make them let me go."

"I think you're being over dramatic about this," Dean tried, even as the majority of his higher brain functions were already itching to turn the Impala in Cas' direction.

"Please Dean."

Dean sighed, eyes again glancing over his brother's peacefully sleeping form, "Yeah alright, sit tight. I'll be there soon."

Dean barely caught Cas' gratitude before the dial tone sounded in his ear.

Sam woke up confused. He was curled as comfortable as possible in the passenger side of an empty Impala. His eyes focusing on the large building nearby, the words 'Idaho' and 'hospital' distinctly standing out against the night's surroundings.

Sam glanced around for Dean, his hand halfway to his phone before he spotted him. His brother was halfway back to the car, a slightly shorter figure close by his side.

Sam's confusion grew more than lessoned when he realized it was Castiel. He could see his brother's grin from here as Cas was leaning close, speaking what looked like frustrated words.

Sam swung his door open, pulling himself out of the car and stretching his muscles after the compact position they'd been bent in. He raised his eyebrows questioningly when Dean's eyes finally landed on him, "Why are we in Idaho?"

"Cas was being a baby," Dean responded easily, a sly tilt to his mouth.

"I was not," Cas defended, arms crossing protectively as he came to stand beside the Impala, "I was merely displeased at being kept against my will."

Dean laughed loudly, his glee extending across to Sam even though he didn't really have a clue what his brother was on about. "Just get in the car Cas."

Cas grinned awkwardly across to Sam as he followed Dean's order, piling himself into the back seat.

Sam raised his eyes back to Dean before resuming their seats.

"Cas is, uh, coming with us," Sam furrowed his brow at Dean's hesitant tone and searching eyes, "Any objections to that?"

Sam screwed his face up, "Of course not man, why the hell would I object?" Sam was still shaking his head as he plopped himself back into his seat. Man, Dean could be so weird sometimes.

Cas didn't seem to be attempting to hide the small smile that was permanently stretched across his lips as they pulled up outside the bunker, and Dean couldn't help enjoying the sight.

He slung his arm over Cas' shoulder as they followed Sam inside, he could see Cas throwing questioning glances in his direction but he didn't care. It had been an all-round successful day, they were all okay, and for a change, they were all together.

"You are in a good mood," Cas stated as Dean unwound from his side, dumping his duffle on the table and unloading the few weapons he'd need to clean.

Dean shrugged as Sam laughed, "Dean spent the day reliving the old days."

"The old days?" Cas questioned, pulling out one of the chairs to seat himself on. His eyes flicked around the spacious room; he couldn't explain why he'd missed this place.

"Yeah. Suppose you knew that Dean spent time in a boy's home? He even managed to find his old girlfriend."

"Shut up Sammy," Dean nudged at his brother as he past, "Don't need to sound bitter about it."

"You still should have told me," Sam continued.

"Whatever, it was like a million years ago. Not like anything big and expediential happened while I was there."

Cas watched the exchange in silence, Sam opening his mouth with the intent to protest but remaining silent at Dean's firm glare.

"Do you have any food?" Cas' question drew the attention of both brothers.

Sam snorted, "Cas it's closer to breakfast than anything else."

"But I am hungry now."

Dean smiled softly, already ignoring any further protests his brother might raise and turned for the kitchen, "I'll make you something."

It didn't take long for Dean to return with two bowls piled high with what smelled like some kind of Chinese food. He placed one down in front of Cas' grinning form, taking the seat beside him with ease.

Dean cast his eyes around, "Sam?"

"He stated that he was tired," Cas replied around a mouthful of food. "This is delicious Dean."

Dean laughed softly, "It's just take out, Cas."

They both polished off their bowls with speed. Dean rolling his eyes when Cas moaned around a mouthful or two. Once they were done Dean raised himself back to his feet, wandering over to grab the decanter of scotch that was close by. He placed it on the table along with two glasses, pouring a small amount of the amber liquid for each of them.

"What's the occasion?" Cas asked, raising the glass hesitantly to his lips before carefully sipping at the substance. He coughed slightly at the initial burn, his eyes remaining on the crystal in his hand, "Look's expensive."

Dean shrugged, gulping down the entirety of his glass in one go, "You're here."

Cas looked undecided on whether he was allowed to grin or not as he sipped at his drink again, "If I recall, it was you who sent me away in the first place. And left once again in Idaho."

Dean poured himself out another measure of drink, slightly more than the first, "I make mistakes all the time, Cas. You know that."

"It was a mistake?"

Dean gazed at the depths of his drink, swirling the substance, "A bad decision at least." He took a sip, the smile that had been constantly lingering around his mouth faltering, "I'm sorry. That I'm such a jerk."

"You're not a jerk, Dean."

Dean went to take another gulp, paused before the substance reached his lips and placed the glass back against the wood of the table pushing it away. His eyes remained on his fingers, "I miss you."

Cas' head perked up at the statement, his eyes focusing on Dean intently.

"I thought it would be easier after seeing you in Idaho, knowing that you were okay and starting to work things out, but it wasn't."

"I miss you as well," Cas mumbled, eyes flicking away when Dean glanced up, "I mean, it's, uh, some things are difficult. It would probably all be a lot smoother if you were around." After fumbling over his words Cas finished his drink, placing his glass heavily down next to Dean's half full one. Cas went back to flicking his eyes back around the room, clearly looking for some kind of topic change, "The case you and Sam worked on, you had been there before?"

Dean smiled softly, "Thought you knew everything about me, when you put me back together and all that."

Cas looked at his hands, fiddling with the long digits, "Some things were always clearer than others."

Dean nodded his head slowly, as if he had any possible inkling to what that could mean, "I was sixteen. After I got caught trying to steal some food I went to Sonny's instead of being charged. It suited my father just fine and he left me there for two months."

"Was it terrible? Is that why you never told Sam?"

"Na, not really. I mean, it was kinda strange, but nothing ever happened to me like you hear in those horror stories on the news. There was stability and Sonny was always really nice to me and there was this great girl, Robin, she was my first – well first in a lot of things, I was even going to take her to this ridiculous dance -"

Dean cut himself off when he realized Cas was staring at him, a softness behind his blue eyes and a shy smile on his lips.

"What?" Dean asked defensively.

Cas shook his head, "Nothing." Dean narrowed his eyes suspiciously. Cas shrugged unabashed, "I enjoy listening to you talk Dean, please continue, you were speaking of dancing."

Dean chuckled softly as Cas patiently waited for him to continue, "Well, we never really got to the dancing part. Dad happened to always have the worst timing."

"You left."

"Yeah," Dean shrugged his shoulders, "It was bound to happen eventually."

Cas' brow pinched in confusion, his head tilting to the side and Dean had to try not to laugh as the sight reminded him of a time when Cas barely grasped anything of humanity, "But you were happy."

"I guess," he paused only briefly, "But I couldn't ever imagine leaving Sammy, even back then, he was my little brother and I didn't want him growing up without me." Dean laughed off his own statement, "Besides, who else was going to save the world?"

Dean grinned wide as Cas laughed openly at that proclamation, "You probably would have had time for at least one dance. The world could have waited another day." Cas' smile turned to one full of pity as he continued to watch the man beside him, "You deserved a normal childhood Dean. Your father could have given you a better upbringing, instead of stealing regular moments from you."

"It wasn't his fault Cas. Life back then was tough on all of us, not just me." Dean noticed as Cas' mouth formed a hard line, "I don't blame my father for anything Cas."

"Maybe you should," Cas muttered bitterly before he could stop himself, a faint blush tinting at his cheeks.

Dean chuckled, "Maybe."

Dean watched as Cas went back to fiddling with his own fingers. It had been a strange day. Between the hunt, old memories and now having Cas back under his roof; Dean was struck with the realization that he hadn't felt such contentment in years. Maybe it was more than contentment, maybe it was something closer to satisfaction. And maybe it all dwindled down to the man seated beside him and the fact that he never wanted him to leave again.

Dean stood up rather swiftly, pushing himself away from the table. He turned and extended his hand in front of Cas, folding the other neatly behind his back and bowing his head.

Cas laughed up at him, "Dean, what are you doing?"

"Reclaiming a stolen moment," He motioned his hand pointedly, until Cas reached forward to take it.

Dean hauled him to his feet. "Dean, what are -"

"Come on." Dean linked his hand with Cas' properly, dragging him down the halls of the bunker and towards his room. Dean could hear the smile on Cas' lips as he continued to try and question him, could feel the unadulterated elation pulsing through him as Cas followed hot on his heels.

Dean closed the door to his room firmly behind them once he had Cas over the threshold, he relinquished the tight hold he had around Cas' palm and walked over to a machine Cas was relatively sure was an old way for playing music.

"Dean, honestly, what are you doing?"

Cas saw Dean smile as he twirled a black disc in his hands before placing it atop the machine, lining up a needle, "I told you, reclaiming a moment."

Cas waited somewhat impatiently for Dean to turn back to him, a soft tune was flowing out of the machine by the time he did and Dean extended his hand once again, "Will you dance with me Castiel?"

Cas' eyebrows shot to his hairline, "You're serious?" Dean nodded even as Cas began to shake his head, "Dean, no, I don't know how to -"

"It's easy, I'll show you," Dean still had his hand raised, "Come on, Cas, dance with me."

Cas took Dean's hand hesitantly and the air went out of him as Dean yanked him close. He kept their hands clasped as his other arm twined around his waist, clutching at his hip. With a lack of options for his remaining hand Cas placed it gingerly against Dean's shoulder. Dean held him firm, a glint to his eyes as he began to sway with the music and Cas melted against him.

He followed Dean with ease, moving with his body as he slowly swirled them around the room. The two of them easily falling in with the soft hum of the music surrounding them. Their interlocked fingers were joined tightly together, a steadfast point for Cas to ground himself in as he felt the world around him melt away, nothing left but the feel of Dean against him.

Dean's hand had moved to tracing patterns across his lower back, the soft flutter of his fingers enticing Cas to sway closer to him with such subtle motions. Out of instinct Cas' hand had shifted further past Dean's shoulder, resting around the base of his neck, his fingers brushing against the ends of Dean's short hair.

When Dean began mindlessly humming the tune surrounding them Cas couldn't help but rest his head against Dean's collarbone, enjoying the feel of the vibrations of Dean's voice as they thrummed straight through him.

It felt like natural progression when Cas felt Dean's lips brush against the top of his head, "You're good at this."

Cas pulled back just far enough so he could look at Dean properly, allow their eyes to meet as Dean continued to direct them around his room. "You're a good teacher."

Dean sighed, he moved their linked hands so he could brush the backs of his fingers softly down the side of Cas' face, "Should have taught you everything."

Cas dropped his hand from Dean's, fastening it into the side of his shirt. Dean continued to stroke lightly against his cheek, trailing his fingers down across his jaw and resting them against the side of his neck. Cas allowed his eyes to slip closed at the feeling, enjoying the warmth as he leaned into Dean's touch.

Cas inhaled sharply when Dean pulled him closer, tilting his face up and lightly brushing their lips together chastely. Cas lost any amount of restraint that he had possessed, grasping firmly at the back of Dean's neck and dragging him back down to repeat the motion with more insistence.

The arm wrapped around Cas' waist tightened, dragging Cas' body in and lining it completely up with Dean's. Cas' hands wrapped around Dean's neck, somehow attempting to draw him closer so Cas could fuse their lips together permanently.

There was no resistance between them as they kissed. Both eagerly allowing access to the other as they lapped inside each other's mouths, tasting each other, twining their tongues together. Cas could feel Dean smiling against him, the soft curve of his lips pressed against Cas' was more than encouragement as Cas clutched his hand desperately through Dean's hair.

It wasn't until Dean pulled back, his grin radiant, that Cas realized they'd stopped moving.

He grinned shyly up at Dean, his hands beginning to loosen their grip, "Sorry, I, uh, suppose that doesn't usually happen when you dance."

Dean pulled Cas back in before he could pull himself any further away, fastening his lips back over Cas', unmoving, merely holding them pressed firmly together, "That should happen when we do anything."

Cas smiled, pressing his lips to the corner of Dean's mouth, then to his jaw, his chin, the dip below his ear; any place that he could easily reach.

Dean's hands were against his hips, his fingers clutching against him harshly as if he was some illusion that could suddenly evaporate into nothing.

Another song began spiralling its way out of the old record player, Dean pressed his lips to the side of Cas' neck, mouthing at the skin and trailing a line up to the shell of Cas' ear, humming along with the soft words. Cas moaned into the sensation, his fingers once again tangling in the strands of Dean's fine hair and holding him close.

"I could do this forever."

"Dance?" Cas asked softly.

He felt Dean chuckle against his neck, "Yeah, that too." Dean used his grip on Cas' waist to manoeuvre the both of them backwards, reaching the edge of his bed and dragging Cas down against the soft surface with him.

Dean rolled Cas onto his back, hovering over him, and gazing down at the piercing blue stare that refused to allow him any form of escape; not that he was seeking one. Dean pressed down against him gently, lining their bodies up with precision and revelling in the motion when Cas attempted to hungrily drag his body closer.

He felt Cas shiver beneath him when he pressed his palm to the bare skin under Cas' shirt. He dragged his hand slowly up Cas' torso, taking the time to feel the muscles ripple beneath the touch of his fingertips.

"Dean," Cas murmured against Dean's cheek.

Dean merely hummed in response, shifting himself just enough so he could push Cas' shirt up over his head and toss it completely out of his way.
He mapped the lines of Cas' body completely, running his hands over every ridge, dip and curve. Cas' eyes rolled back into his head when Dean began retracing the path with his tongue. He paid particular attention to the lines of Cas' collarbones, the sharp jut of his hips and the intricately inscribed ink that was marked against his side.

When he finally dragged the waistband of Cas' jeans down his hips the pace felt antagonizing. Dean was still taking his time when Cas could think of nothing but those skilled lips and hands against every part of him. Cas managed to connect enough synapses to realize that he was the only one being undressed, his hands immediately lunging forward to rectify that situation.

Dean's bare skin ran smoothly beneath his palms, the strength of his body rippling against him as they both explored one another. Cas' lips seemed to have developed a fascination for the tattoo inscribed at the top of Dean's chest, and his tongue stuttered against the pattern when Dean's hand wrapped firmly over the bulge at the front of Cas' boxers.

"Dean," the name slipped past Cas' lips again, his tone deeper than before and yet he sounded in need.

"Yeah. I know Cas." Dean fastened his lips over Cas' as he worked his hand slowly, pumping Cas' shaft through the thin layer of his underwear. He could feel the spot of dampness beginning to leak through and he pressed down with more insistence.

Cas fumbled quickly to rid Dean of his pants, shucking the denim along with his boxers out of the way and onto the ground. Cas didn't hesitate to map the remainder of Dean's strong body, his hands running solidly over his hips and around to the curve of his ass. He squeezed at the round muscle firmly and grinned as Dean instinctively rutted towards him.

Dean finally pushed Cas' boxers down out of the way, gently nudging Cas back down onto his back and resting over him, their lips tightly sealed. Dean wrapped his hand around both his and Cas' leaking erections as he plunged his tongue deeper into Cas' mouth, edging towards the back of his throat.

Cas moaned around the intruding muscle, bucking up reflexively into the friction Dean's hand was creating. He groaned as Dean worked at him, slicking them together, the wet slide of skin on skin bringing both of them pleasure. Cas' hands scrabbled down the planes of Dean's back, his body arching up into everything that Dean offered him, his mouth more than happy to open up to anything that Dean wanted.

They could both feel the tight coil in their bellies all too soon. Their breath had been reduced to nothing but pants and the only sounds Cas was still managing to make were tiny high pitched whimpers that sounded nothing close to his ordinary tone.

Cas reached his end first, his seed pulsing out of him in rapid rates as Dean moaned his name over and over into his ear. He could feel the substance spreading between them, the slick of it speeding Dean's still moving hand until he felt the hunter shudder above him, heard his groan of completion and watched as he too fell over the edge.

They lay panting against one another, Dean collapsing himself across Cas' chest. Cas could feel their come mixing between them, their essence staining the sheets as well as themselves.

Cas leaned to press his lips into Dean's hair, his eyes slipping closed as he clutched at Dean's cooling body and held him close. "Whenever you teach me something, it should always end with sex."

Cas could feel Dean laughing against him, felt his smile press all the way up his sternum before coming to rest firmly against his lips, "Deal."

Dean regretfully pulled himself away from Cas so he could clean them, he used the stained sheet, wiping them up as much as he could before tossing it aside; he'd wash it in the morning. He covered them both with a much cleaner blanket, Cas immediately nuzzling into his side as soon as he was back within reach.

Dean smiled, his legs twining with Cas' easily, arms slotting around one another as if they'd been doing this for years; Dean figured in hindsight they probably should have been.

"Tell me you'll let me stay," Cas' voice was small against Dean's side, the feel of his lips moving against Dean's skin.

Dean tilted Cas' face up, sealing their lips firmly together, "You're not going anywhere," another kiss, "Ever again."

They melted together, tangled in the sheets of Dean's bed, limbs locked around one another as they exchanged languid kisses. Dean had called Sonny's home once, he'd never really had one since then, the constant moving from motel to motel, always being on the road, it had prevented such a thing. The bunker was the first time Dean had ever truly felt like he'd found his place again, but there had still been something missing.

Now, wrapped in the safety of Cas' arms, he didn't need to wonder what the missing piece to the puzzle had been. This was home; the bat cave, his family, Cas. And it always would be.

"Thank you Dean," Cas' words sounded faint, as if he was on the brink of sleep, "For bringing me back."

Dean pressed his lips lightly to Cas', watching as his angel slowly drifted off.

"Welcome home, Cas."