Author's Note: Here's an "Exclusive" "Preview" of the next story in The Madoka Series, "Once Upon a Time in Madoka"! It's... it's been out for several months now, but for consistency's sake, I want to give a preview of it at the end of this story to entice anyone that liked this story here, since doesn't have a "series" option like Archive of Our Own.

So make sure you read "Once Upon a Time in Madoka", if you like stories that are funny. Which is fine by me if you do. I don't judge.

Once Upon a Time in Madoka

by Thedude3445

1

Madoka

Madoka Kaname stood undaunted against the vast empty stretches of desert before her. She tipped her sombrero and chuckled. "Looks like I'm in a bit of a pickle here, aren't I?" No-one was around to hear her, but she pretended she wasn't alone anyway. "Guess I'll have to get back home on my own, then!"

As Sheriff of Mexico, Madoka had been well acquainted with the desert. It was something of a friend that she met often, had tea with, and talked to about her problems. It wasn't coarse and irritating and it didn't get everywhere like SOME people would say. The only bad thing about sand was…. that there was so much of it. And it went on for miles (kilometers, actually, but since the author was American it became miles). And it made it hard to figure out where you where. Nearly impossible in fact. Meaning, Madoka had no idea where she was. She also didn't know what day it was, either. She really hoped she had only been knocked out for a couple minutes and not several days...

She decided to walk east. She may or may not have been far in the west from her home, but she decided that would be the best bet, anyway. If she was wrong, she'd just end up seeing the Caribbean Sea eventually, which wasn't the worst thing in the world The worst thing in the world would be dying out here in the desert. Well, no, the worst thing in the world would be turning into a witch in the middle of the desert.

Though… Could magical girls even still turn into witches? It had been over five years since the events of "My Big Fat Madoka Wedding", wherein Homura turned out to be a transformation of Kyubey tasked with manipulating everyone to turn into witches themselves, but ever since Madoka and Kyoko defeated all the Kyubeys at the wedding, there hadn't been a single witch to fight. Maybe no more Kyubey also meant that everyone's soul gems were forever unbound to the laws of conservation of energy?

But enough of this talk that was actually exposition in disguise. Madoka only wanted to think about the future. A future that included catching that dastardly villain El Guante. It was his fault she was stranded out in the middle of somewhere, and it was now her ultimate goal to catch and imprison him- for great justice! Madoka almost actually captured him, you know. But when she snuck aboard his private jet and attacked him, she kind of… accidentally… fell out. Though she was fairly certain he did too; he was probably somewhere in the general vicinity and was looking for a place to hide out as well. Wait- crap. She was doing exposition again. "Sorry, reader!"