Chapter 3:

It wasn't long after meeting Santana that I knew I had to have her in my life. Every time that our skin met, I was overwhelmed by how soft she was and the warmth that radiated off of every inch of her body. It was an almost immediately after we had parted ways that I began to miss her both physically and emotionally.

I had walked home after our meal at Breadstix with a smile that I couldn't get rid of even if I had tried. Surprisingly, not even the homeless man that lives at the bus stop on the corner next to my apartment could ruin my mood. His name is Rob and he likes to think nasty things about everything… even stray cats… Those poor cats are just trying to –

Anyways, back to the story. As soon as I opened the door to my apartment I was overwhelmed with loneliness. At this point, I had lived in my own apartment for over a year and never experienced this feeling. Actually, before that moment I had reveled in and welcomed the silence that the small apartment offered.

For the first time in my life, I dreaded the thought of spending the night in my home alone.

That night I called my mom for the first time in three months. Surprisingly, I can't read people's minds over the phone, but that never made it easier for us to make that initial contact. The phone call was awkward at first, but eventually she asked me if I had any new friends.

I immediately thought of Santana and the possibility of us being real friends. So for the first time in years I opened up to my mom about how I felt. I not only told her about the fact that I she made it easier to concentrate my thinking on one person, but also shared the possibility of a more intimate relationship.

When I was growing up, my parents tried so hard to relate with me. Eventually, after years of failed teenager play dates, they realized that I was a lost cause. Over the years they tried less and less until the three of us stopped talking altogether.

That's why I was shocked when her only response was to ask if Santana was a lesbian. Of course I knew the answer, since Santana had blurted it out at dinner earlier, but I didn't know if by admitting it I was also telling my mom that I was gay as well. After a few seconds of silence my mom surprised me by telling me it was okay that I liked girls and if I would be happy with Santana then she and my father would support me. Since I hadn't said anything to let her know what I was thinking, I asked her if she could secretly read minds too. She laughed and told me no, that she just cared enough about me know what my silences meant.

That was the first time I had made my mom laugh in a long time and I couldn't help but to laugh along.

That day had been filled with a lot of firsts for me. By the time I had taken my shower and crawled into my bed, I was out like Santa Clause on Christmas morning. I've never been a deep sleeper which allows me to remember all of my dreams, that night it was definitely awesome because even though real Santana is amazing, I found out that dream Santana was a good substitute.

That was the day that I first realized that my life had been missing something, and that thing was Santana.

Six months earlier- July 17th

The bright lights of the dance studio shone down on Brittany as she stood beside her students doing the routine. As she did the final turn and took a bow, a drop of sweat fell from her brow and hit the hard wood floor.

A short second of complete silence filled the large room. However, before Brittany could even lift her upper body out of the bow, a loud applause erupted from the front of the room. Once Brittany stood up completely, she watched as her students ran up to their parents and received their praise.

Overall, the class hadn't been as bad as Brittany had expected. That morning when she had woken up, Brittany immediately felt dread run through her body. The nerves that she had anticipated turned out to be even worse and it had taken her hours before she could even get herself out of bed and once she did, she was unable to eat.

The day had been extremely lazy, but when she walked into the studio like she did every day, she felt a burst of energy due to nervousness.

At first she thought that she was nervous because she'd have to be in a room with at least 20 adults for about an hour, but after the first person arrived and she felt a bit of sadness because it wasn't Santana. That's when she realized that her nerves we because she was excited to see the Latina that had been invading her thoughts.

Brittany?

"Brittany?" Santana asked, waving her hand in front of the blonde's face. When Brittany's body stiffened and her head snapped to attention, Santana giggled. "Sorry if I scared you."

She is so adorable.

"No, um… I was just lost in my thoughts." Brittany responded. "It's better than getting lost in the sewers. It's nothing like the way they show it on Finding Nemo."

Stop smiling like an idiot and talk to her.

"Pancakes!" Santana yelped. Everyone left in the studio turned to look at her causing her face to darken in embarrassment. She lowered her head slightly and waited for the attention to be taken off of her. "I mean… Saturday is Zack's and I pancake day. I make chocolate chip pancakes and we watch a movie. If you aren't busy maybe you would like to come over and join us for Finding Nemo. It's his turn to choose and it's what he always picks."

"Oh, um…" Brittany started, but the way she looked around nervously caused Santana to interrupt.

"It's okay, forget I even brought it up. Of course, you probably spend Friday nights with your boyfriend. Why wouldn't you." Santana turns around quickly and starts walking towards the door.

Stupid, stupid.

Brittany watched Santana in shock at how quickly everything happened. She tried to make herself move to run after the other woman, but her brain was quickly becoming overloaded. It appeared that as Santana got further away, the other voices still in the room became louder.

I'll just stop by Taco Bell… Can't she tell I don't want to talk to her?... My kid is obviously the cutest…

"Ms. Pierce, I need to talk to you about how…"

I hope my husband doesn't want to…

"…have private lessons. We really can't…"

Stop picking your wedgies in public, you little…

"…peach season is still a couple months away, but maybe…"

Deal or No Deal starts in 20 minutes, shit!

"Ms. Pierce?"

Once Brittany finally focused to the overly plump mother in front of her, she couldn't do anything, but nod her head. Seeing that the she must have given the woman the answer that she wanted to hear, Brittany excused herself in the changing room to grab her things.

Thankfully, the dressing room wasn't too far from Brittany's classroom because she barely made it through the door before she began to hyperventilate. As her breathing began to quicken, Brittany took a seat on the bench in the middle of the hall. She felt faint as she tried to get her brain to stop focusing on all the voices that she could hear in the other room and instead on the silence that welcomed her where she was.

Due to the fact that this was not Brittany's first anxiety attack in her life, she sat with her head between her legs and her face towards the ground. Squeezing her eyes shut, and trying to focus on slowing her breathing, Brittany didn't hear the door to the dressing room open.

"Britt?" Mike called hesitantly. When the blonde did look up, Mike could see the exhaustion and pain in her eyes. "What happened? Are you okay?"

As Mike knelt in front of her, Brittany leaned so that she could put her head on his shoulder.

Oh, Britt. Why won't you just open up to me. I want to help you so bad.

Without saying a word, Mike continued to rub Brittany's back soothingly until her breathing went back to its normal speed. Brittany raised her head and pulled back enough that she could send him a thankful smile.

"Thanks, Mike. You really are a good friend."

"Britt, what happened to make you so sad?" Mike asked seriously.

"I wasn't sad," Brittany told him, rubbing the remnants of tears from her eyes. "I was just overwhelmed."

The Asian man patiently waited for her to continue. When he realized that she wasn't going to tell him, he stood up to leave.

One step forward, two steps back.

"Mike!" Brittany called him back. As soon as he sat back in front of her, Brittany continued, "I- I think I like someone. Like, like-like. Do you understand?"

"Not really."

The blonde sighed and lowered her head in her hands. "I want pancakes and Nemo…"

"Still not comprehending, Britt." Mike laughed, causing the woman to groan and raise her head so that her eyes could meet Mike's.

"I have this new boy in my class, Zack Lopez. His mom picked him up from his first class this week and the minute – no, second – that I saw her, I felt things that I have never felt before. She is so beautiful and gorgeous and nice and funny and…"

"I get the point." Mike interrupted. "You like this woman. What's wrong with that? Is it because she is a woman?"

Brittany thought about it for a little bit before responding. She had never been one to judge attraction based on gender and after her conversation with her mother, she knew that it wasn't her sexuality that scared her. However, she had no idea how to explain her fears to Mike without telling him her secret.

"I've never dated anyone before."

Mike smiled and moved so that he was sitting next to Brittany. "Well I personally think it's about time. And I don't know how much Tina has told you, but I consider myself to be really good at dating women so if you ever need advice I am here."

Brittany turned to Mike and pulled him into a hug. She whispered a quiet thank you into his shoulder while he allowed his hand to rub her back. When she finally pulled away she asked him the biggest question she had, "How do you flirt and leave her wanting more?"

Mike just laughed and took her hand to lead her to his office. "Oh, boy, we have a lot of work ahead of us."

Later that evening, Brittany stood in front of the dark brown door for what felt like ages, but in reality was only a couple minutes. She tried to convince her arm that it would be okay to lift up and allow her hand to hit the door to make a knocking sound. However, it appeared as though her body was not listening to her today. Finally giving up, Brittany turned away from the door that leads into Santana's house and back towards the street.

Before she could make it more than a few steps, she heard the door behind her open.

"Were you going to knock, or just stand outside my house like a stalker?" Santana asked from the doorway. When Brittany turned to look at her, the Latina was surrounded by the light from inside her house. The comparison to the dark night felt symbolic in the way that she brought light to Brittany's otherwise dark life.

"Uh…" Brittany's voice trailed as she began to hear Santana.

Breathe, Santana, she is just a beautiful woman. A beautiful woman that you like. A beautiful woman that you like and appears to like you, too. Okay, maybe you should focus on breathing.

"I love pancakes." Brittany started, finally able to talk after realizing that Santana is just as nervous as her. "What I mean is… I want to have breakfast and watch Finding Nemo with you and Zack. That is, if the offer is still open…"

"Of course it is. You didn't have to come all the way to my house to tell me that." Santana whispered, causing Brittany to realize how close they had gotten. She hadn't even realized that she had been slowly taking steps back to the door until she could basically feel Santana's words instead of hear them.

"I don't have a boyfriend by the way."

"You don't?"

"Or a girlfriend." Brittany's smile couldn't get any bigger as she knew she was teasing Santana. She didn't need to hear Santana's thoughts to know that it was working, as she could feel it in the deepness of the woman's breathing.

"And, why would I care if you are dating anyone?" Santana asked, obviously trying to get a little bit of control in the conversation.

"I know that you know why." Brittany replied.

Before Santana could respond, the blonde had already turned down the driveway and was walking away. She allowed her hips to sway a little more than was necessary, knowing from her thoughts that Santana was watching. As soon as she reached the street she turned and waved. "I'll see you tomorrow, Ms. Lopez."

For the first time, Brittany smirked knowing that it was Santana watching her walk away.

A/N: So I know that this chapter took me longer than anticipated, however, I started a new job and it's been kicking my butt. You all are awesome and the way my inbox exploded made my heart burst in excitement. Don't worry, it wasn't literally…

Anyways, I wanted to put in how Brittany found out Santana's address in this chapter, but it just fits better in the next one. Which will hopefully be up later this week if all goes well. Please let me know what you like and what you don't because all reviews help with the creative process and if I'm doing something wrong then I'd love to know. \

Thanks!