Hi... This is Dimitri's POV of Dark Paradise, I hope you enjoy it... I tried to research as much as possible and would like to thank Gabriel Logynn Miller for all of his help with getting the 'Military stuff' right... Sassy and Angela, as always girls, thank you... I love you both! I did a bit of fiddling since they checked this over, so any mistakes are mine...

Enjoy!

Paradise Lost

DPOV

Another sunrise…

Another day alone here in hell…

It's been months since my capture.

I'm not exactly sure how many months, but I know it's been a bloody long time; long enough to know that anyone of any importance in my life has probably given up hope that I'm still alive.

My mind goes back to that day… I remember my heart thumping with adrenalin… Fear, confusion, pain and anger were but a few of the emotions that flooded through my body as I lay bound and hooded in the back of my attacker's vehicle. I remember the many plans of possible escape that flooded my brain too. The different scenarios were quickly hatched and thought out one after the other, I didn't know if I'd ever have the chance to implement any of them but my training had kicked in full force.

Yet the one constant in the back of my mind the whole time was Rose… She was my heart, my life, my constant… my wife. I had to get away… for her, for us.

That was the day my life changed so devastatingly…

=x=

I was now a couple of months into my last ten months of my four year tour. Two months ago, I'd gone through the most emotional separation from the love of my life. I can honestly say it was the first time that going AWOL actually went through my mind … But I knew it was useless and I eventually tore myself out of her arms and boarded the flight that took me away from my Roza.

"So, are you coming back after this tour Sarge?"

I looked up from the map in my lap and looked over my left shoulder to Tanner; he was one of the nine men of my squad and was sitting behind the driver in the back seat. I instantly thought about what Rose went through before I left for this hell-hole; the fear she had of me not returning to her that I knew she tried to hide. It took only seconds for me to know my answer, an answer I'd been stewing on for the last few months.

"Nah… This'll be my last. I have a beautiful woman waiting for me at home, what in the hell makes you think I'd choose your ugly mug over her?"

The men's laughter rang out in our Humvee…

"A little bit of lippy and a nice dress and you'd never know the difference Sarge!" The youngest member of our unit called out.

"Trust me Ashford, no amount of makeup on that face would even come close to…"

That's all I got out…

I'm not sure how long it took my brain to register the cause of the pain that wracked my body… My eyes clenched tight as I tried desperately to pull in the oxygen that was just forced out of my body by the shockwave of some sort of explosion; it felt like I had an elephant sitting on my chest. The force that had slammed against my body had me disorientated and seeing stars.

"Tanner…." I called out in a weak and scratchy voice. The simple exertion of trying to speak had pulled in dry air and sand into my painful lungs. Desperately, I tried to blink away the black, blotchiness clouding my vision. "Tanner… Where are you?"

I could hear the rapid popping of automatic fire from outside of our truck and I knew I had to pull myself together and fast. My breathing picked up in relation to the amount of adrenaline that now surged through my veins, the smell of blood, smoke, dirt and gun powder assaulted my senses…

"Sarge…"

The sound of his voice snapped my muddy brain into gear. I had men to look after, friends… brothers. Twisting myself out of the position I'd been thrown into was painful to say the least but I soon made my way over to Tanner. One look told me that he didn't have long.

"Shit… get a… message… Sonya. Love her." His words were cut off with a spluttering cough moments before his eyes glazed over and the light of his life left his body. I said a quick, silent prayer and goodbye to my brother-in-arms and looked up to see that Ashford was already gone.

So young…

Making my way out of the mangled vehicle, I saw that most of my men were still alive. I called out to Corporal Alto who'd been in the other truck to grab some more ammo while I and three others laid cover fire. He never made it. The moment I heard the impact of the bullet hitting him, my attention was diverted… it was no longer where it should have been. That's when I was hit.

My left shoulder and chest exploded in hot pain and I went down from the impact. I must have hit my head, because after that, everything went black.

=x=

I was brought out of my memory by a loud clanging. I looked up from my thin bedding in the corner of my prison to see my captor open my door and push in a tray of food. The usual guard stood behind him with a look on his face that transcended the language barrier… He wanted me to make a move, any move that would allow him to finally pull that trigger but I had something that kept me rooted to my spot… Roza. I had to get home to her and not in a box.

"Eat!" This was one of about a dozen English words my captors spoke. I hadn't known much of the local language before I was captured but I worked out enough at the time to know that they didn't know if they should just kill me immediately and save them problems or try to ransom me off to the U.S. army. Obviously they chose the latter, as here I was months later and still alive…

They laughed and taunted me as I stayed where I was; my eyes were the only thing that moved as I watched the men walk away from my cell. I learned that particular lesson quickly… It had been a week after arriving and my shoulder where I'd been shot was still painful and a little bit hot. I hadn't been fed to that point, only given meagre amounts of water, so the sight of food had me scrambling to the front of my cell, but before I could get a single morsel into my mouth, the butt of the rifle slammed into my sore shoulder before coming down to my head, knocking me out. By the time I came to, pain now radiated through my skull and my lone companion was making a feast of the slop I'd been given. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath to stop the dizziness, I pushed off the dirt floor, scared the rat back to wherever he went when he wasn't with me and dug into the foul tasting food in front of me. I didn't want to know what it was but whatever it was, it didn't agree with me. Within an hour, it came back up, violently.

I was punished for that too. That was the first time they broke my ribs. It wasn't long after that that I saw the woman for the first time.

Over the course of what was probably months, I'd watch as she'd appear quietly at the end of the corridor that was opposite to the front of my cell after I was fed and the men walked away. I'd noticed almost immediately that she was somehow different to everyone around me, what little skin I could see was paler and the bridge of her nose more angular – western looking, but it was her eyes that made her stand out the most. The closest color I could come up with was either Jade or Turquoise…

It wasn't until maybe one or two months ago, after yet another beating session from my captors that left me with what felt like a re-broken arm and smashed hands that I was once more in need of her makeshift doctoring. I hadn't known at the time, but she'd always been the one who was made to patch me up. That last beating was when my suspicions were concerned.

"I'm sorry." She said softly as she cleaned my wounds. It was said so softly that I almost didn't understand the words. But what I did understand was her accent. British… It was slight, but it was there. My heart sped up in desperate hope that she would be the one to get me out of here.

"Help me." I said back just as soft. A quick shake of her head and she disappeared. My heart stopped. "No…" I whispered to myself. It was two days later before I saw her again. Each day, she'd inch closer down the corridor but her eyes darted around her in deadly fear. I knew what she feared. As much as I was their prisoner, she was probably more at risk of losing her life than I was. I heard the guard call out to her one day… Fairuz… So at least I knew her name.

"I don't know how to help." She whispered. "I'm always watched."

I nodded in understanding. "Are you allowed to leave here?"

"Sometimes."

"Do you go anywhere that you see soldiers?" She nodded. Her eyes and ears were constantly on full alert. "Can you get a hold of some paper and a pen?" She was confused so I quickly explained…

"I can give you a quick message for you to pass to the soldiers." At the mention of her approaching soldiers, her eyes widened in panic so I tried to explain. "No, no… All you have to do is walk in front of them and drop it at their feet. They'll come for me… for us… if you want."

Her eyes flashed to mine and I could see the desperation to escape. "For me?"

"I'll put in the note that you helped me and need rescuing; that you're British."

Her face crumpled and her eyes watered in hope. She nodded quickly but before we could say anymore, she was gone. Her ears picking up the arrival of my… our captors before mine did. The next two days were horrible when she didn't come back. I feared that she'd been caught trying to help me and then hurt or killed so when she finally arrived with an armed guard and carrying my tray of slop, I had to scowl my features so that I wouldn't show my utter relief.

I only went to my food once they'd gone and then when I lifted up the bowl, I found a folded up piece of paper that had what I assumed was directions to or the actual address of where I was and a small burnt stick. I didn't understand what the stick was for at first but then I realised that she couldn't hide a pen on the tray. She was smart… The little, blackened piece of wood gave me something that I could write with, and write I did… The paper wasn't very big so under the girls writing I put down my serial number, signature and three letters… P.O.W. Then, on the other side I wrote… My saviour is British, help her.

After eating, I kept the note with me until I was sure she'd be the one to retrieve my empty tray. When I heard footsteps, I pressed my face against the bars to see who was coming; seeing the girl, I let out the breath I'd been holding before slipping the note back under the bowl.

She kept her eyes down as she approached then bent to pick up my tray but once out of the sight of the man behind her, her eyes flicked up to mine. I looked quickly at the bowl before looking back to her and hoped with everything in me that she understood what I was trying to say…. Under the bowl… Under the bowl….

It was roughly two or maybe three days later that I saw Fairuz again. My cell door was opened and she bent down to place my tray of food on the ground. She kept her face pointed to the ground but looked up at me under her lashes. I nearly cried as I watched her wink at me…. Now all I could do was hope.

Hope came three days after that.

I was sitting in my cell; memories of my life with my beautiful wife were once again playing through my mind. The noises outside weren't enough to pull my attention away at first but it didn't take long to recognise the sound of automatic rifle fire before the yelling and the screaming joined in.

"Check down the stairs!" My eyes closed at the sound of American voices. I smiled and couldn't help the strained laugh of relief bubble out of me before making my way to the front of cell. As I heard screaming coming from above, I couldn't help but worry about Fairuz, I hoped with everything in me that she didn't get caught in the crossfire.

"Belikov! Sergeant Belikov!"

"Here…" My voice was quite croaky as I very rarely spoke and when I did it was only in a whisper to Fairuz. I cleared my throat and hoped I could yell loud enough to be heard over the ruckus going on upstairs. "HERE! I'm down here!" I watched desperately to my left… "Here…."

I'm not ashamed to say that I shed a tear when I saw a familiar face… "God, it's good to see you… I thought you were dead."

"Takes more than these bastards to kill me, Castile." I saw movement behind him and my eyes flicked to his left. Fairuz… thank God. Castile caught my eye movement but before I could say anything, he spun to attack… "NO!" I yelled.

"Don't move…" Eddie growled out at the now terrified woman.

"No Ed… she's the one that helped me. This is Fairuz."

"Natalie… My name is Natalie."

"Well, Natalie," Eddie said with a smile. "Let's see about getting my friend out of here. Move away man…" He said as he pointed his handgun to the lock of my cell. Before he got a chance to fire, Natalie's hand reached out with a key…

"This would be easier." I couldn't help but laugh.

=x=

Sitting in the back of the truck, I wrapped my arm around Natalie and looked around at the faces of the men around me. Some I knew, some I didn't but all I could think of was getting home to my wife.

"So, Natalie… How did you find yourself here?" Eddie asked. I looked down to the girl whose face I was seeing for the first time and waited to hear her story.

Apparently, her English mother had met and married an Iraqi and started a family straight away… Natalie was the youngest of three daughters. When she was fifteen, she and her two older sisters were taken to 'visit' their father's estranged family. It only took the girls a few hours to understand that their father had sold them into marriage. That was three years ago. She had no idea what happened to her sisters, she hadn't seen them since that fateful day and the only time she did ask, she was beaten so badly that she'd lost the child she'd been pregnant with… since then, she hadn't fallen pregnant again.

The realisation of that part of her story was rather bittersweet. One would deduce that the beating had done so much damage that she could no longer fall pregnant and I think she was happy about that but on the other hand, now… with a new life in front of her, it was something else that had been stolen from her.

"Why did they give you that name?" Eddie asked.

"Fairuz… it means Turquoise… for my eyes." There wasn't much else said for a while and as usual, my thoughts turned to my wife.

"I need to call Rose as soon as I we get back." I said to Eddie.

"They'll want to debrief first and you'll need to see the doc for those injuries, you know that."

He wasn't wrong. No matter what I said once we'd made it back to base, they wouldn't let me contact anyone until I'd given a complete rundown of my last eight months… Eight…. I couldn't believe it. I knew it had been a long time, but… The ache in my chest that had been with me all along only increased at the thought of what Rose must have been going through all these long months, but eight months was a long time… Had she given up? Had she accepted that I was probably dead and moved on with her life? The thought of that nearly ripped my soul in two… I wasn't real sure on how I'd handle that if that was really what had happened.

Suddenly the thought of calling her didn't sound so good… Suddenly, I knew that I had to see for myself first and then worry about how to handle things… The medical exam hadn't gone well. Multiple broken and healed ribs…. My right arm that had been broken during one of my many interrogations had mended badly, a shattered scapula from being shot, broken hands that had not long been healed. They informed me that at some point in the near future, I would have to go in to have things re-broken and set correctly but right now, now all I could think of was getting home.

Before leaving, I was informed that because of my injuries, I would be given a medical discharge. The closer I got to home, the more nervous I became. I didn't know what to expect when I got there, what I'd find. Because of my injuries and a favour from my previous Lieutenant who was especially happy to see me alive. I don't know who was more shocked at the hug she gave me when I hobbled into my home base; me, Lieutenant Kirova or the dozen or so other people in the room. "You're one tough son of a bitch Belikov, you know that?"

Now, here I am… sitting behind Kirova's personal driver and pulling up in front of the beach house I hopefully still shared with my Roza. "I'll stay until I know you want me to leave." Corporal Croft said with a salute as I got out of the car.

"Okay, thank you Corporal." I walked up to the house and watched as the curtain beside the door moved… I wasn't sure who it was, but all I did see was blonde hair, I was suddenly nervous of who was behind that door. Moments later, the door was flung open…

"Dimitri?" I smiled as I recognised Lissa… "Oh…. Oh my… God…." Tears streamed down her face as she ran to me. I watched as Chris and Adrian stood behind him, both in a state of shock. I staggered as Lissa slammed into me.

"Gees, you're stronger than you look Princess." All I could do was hold her while she sobbed. I looked up to see Adrian looking off to the back of the house and wondered if he was looking at Rose.

"Oh God… you're really alive, oh my God…." She babbled.

"Liss… I love you and I love the greeting, but I really need to see my wife. Is she here?" I could hear the hesitancy in my voice.

"Yeah…" she said as she nodded and wiped her face clear of the tears and snot. "She's… down by the water."

I thought it odd, it was more than a little chilly tonight, I couldn't work out why she'd be down on the beach. I turned around and waved to Kirova's driver, sending him back to base and let Lissa walk me into the house.

"How is she Liss?"

"Not good. She took your disappearance really hard; she's never really bounced back. She's not the Rose she was when you left D…" Her words brought tears to my eyes and broke my heart. I knew it would have been hard for her, but for me to survive, I couldn't let myself think of just how hard it could have been for her.

"It's good to have you back man." Chris said as we made it into the house. Everyone walked with me to the patio doors but only I walked outside. "Now, go heal her heart and bring her back to all of us."

There I saw her… "Roza…" I said in a strangled voice. Instantly, I could see how much thinner she was, even at this distance. I moved further and further down the sandy beach and as I drew closer, I could hear the deep emotion in her voice as she sang… That and the words she sang were hard to hear.

But there's no you, except in my dreams tonight,
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight…
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight…

As she faced the ocean, her arms wrapped around her torso as if to hold herself together, I could hear her anguish… the almost desperate edge to her voice and it felt like my heart was being squeezed beyond reason.

"Baby…" I whispered. I didn't want to scare her. I read in between the lines of what Lissa had said; that coupled with her thin frame and broken voice, I knew I had to take this reunion slow and gentle.

"Great… Now you can hear him when you're awake too…. You've hit a new personal low Rose."

She thinks she's hearing things…. I turned back to the house to see everyone watching, though Lissa was now on the sand at the bottom of the steps.

"Roza…" I watched as she cringed at the sound of her name but she obviously still thought I was a figment of her imagination. I didn't know what to do. Should I reach out and touch her… speak up…? She took a deep breath and straightened herself slightly….

"I love you," she said in a strangled whisper. "I always will."

"As I love you…." I still wasn't sure she realised I was actually standing behind her. She sniffed back her tears and turned… What I saw shattered me even further than I thought I could…

My beautiful Roza…

Her body, face and soul were wracked in pain, something I've never seen before and to know that it was me that had put her through that was something that I would never forgive myself for. I could see the confusion in her eyes before she shut them.

"Damn… It finally happened. The pain finally sent me mad. Huh…" When her eyes opened and I was still in front of her, something changed in her eyes, I hoped it was recognition. "I guess this is better than… the last eight months, yeah… I can live with this… this is better." She whispered.

No…. She thinks she's hallucinating…

"Roza. Baby, it me…"

This was just the start of the next soul destroying twenty minutes. I watched as pain, confusion, acceptance of madness all crossed over her beautiful features and it seemed nothing I did or said would convince her that I was really here. When she recoiled from my touch, it made me desperate. I called out for Lissa, who I knew had started to make her way down the beach when our reunion didn't go as we'd all thought it would.

It was only her words…. "Listen to him Rose." …that seemed to break through the disbelief at what she was seeing.

"What did you say?" I could tell she wanted to believe but was scared to all the same.

"You're not seeing things sweetie, it really is him; he's really here." I looked up to our good friend, seeing how Rose's reaction was breaking her heart. When she looked over to me, I could almost hear her say… It's all up to you now…

Then my beautiful wife looked back to me and I opened my arms… "I love you baby. I'm really home." I could only hope the tears that streamed from her eyes were a good thing…

"Dimitri?" The desperate plea in her voice was loud and clear… she wanted to believe but would be crushed if I wasn't real.

With my own tears falling freely, I spoke…. "Yeah baby, it's me."

"Oh God…" I barely had time to brace before she slammed into me; it hurt when we slammed back into the hard sand but it only just registered for a second once I looked up into her beautiful face. "It's you, it's really you." She sobbed. Her eyes flittered everywhere as her hands desperately touched my face and chest.

"You scared me babe. I'm so sorry Roza, I'm so fucking sorry." I knew we'd be doing a lot of talking over then few days, but I wanted… no, needed to get that out there right away. I would be forever sorry for putting her though the last eight months. I know it wasn't completely my fault, but the guilt was there none the less….

I couldn't wait any longer; I needed to kiss her…. Desperately. I slipped my hands from her face to the back of her head and closed the distance between us. The feeling of finally being this close to her again was almost overwhelming. There were times when I almost conceded defeat and to feel her soft lips against mine again was pure and utter bliss. I couldn't even stop when Rose started sobbing; if anything, it made me kiss her deeper, plundering her hot, wet mouth with my tongue…. reassurance for me as well as for her. To taste her again was something I'd spent the last eight months dreaming about.

When I felt water hit my side from the incoming tide, I knew we had to move. Rose started to panic a little when I pulled away, so again I tried to reassure her that I wasn't going anywhere ever again… She clung to me, something I could totally understand. I tried to stand up but with my injuries it was proving more difficult than I was comfortable with. I was grateful for the hand that eventually came into my field of vision.

I looked up to see Adrian. I knew they had all stayed on the rear deck of the house when I first came out here so it didn't surprise me that he was close at hand when I needed help. "Thanks…" I said quietly once I was on my feet. It was only now with her in my arms that I could really tell how much weight she'd lost. With a nod, we made our way up to the house where Lissa was crying in her husband's arms.

I knew our friends would leave if I asked them to but I could see that they were desperate to know what had happened, so for the next hour I sat with Rose clinging tightly to me on my lap and gave them a run through of what the last eight months of my life had been like. I don't know how much Rose heard, she never really lifted her head away from my neck.

They all wanted to hear more about my saviour, wanted to make sure that she had whatever she needed to move forward in her life after being sold by her father. They were good people and I was glad that my wife had them around her since my capture.

"We'll get going," Lissa said as she stood. "There's food in the fridge if you guys get hungry. Call if you need us, we won't be far away."

"Thanks Liss."

I watched them leave and took a deep breath, revelling in being alone with my wife again after so long. "Roza…" I said before kissing her forehead. My heart stuttered as I watched tears fall from her eyes. "Oh, baby."

"Hold me."

"Forever." Standing up was easier this time; her lighter weight enabling me to carry her to our room. I sat on the edge of the bed and somehow unlace my boots one handed, it wasn't easy but I did it. I kicked them off before standing and turning to face the bed. I laid her down so that I could get out of my uniform but she didn't want to let go… "I'm not going anywhere beautiful; just let me get out of these clothes." Reluctantly, she let me go but her eyes never wavered from me as I stripped down.

When I looked back at her, I couldn't help but stand there and just… take her all in. I almost had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming again…

My wife… lying on our bed, our soft bed, looking at me as if I hung the moon… but scared I'd disappear before her very eyes if she looked away.

I climbed in and the feel of the cotton sheets beneath me was so familiar yet so strange after sleeping on dirt covered in an inch of scratchy woollen fabric for nearly a year. But it was when Rose moved into my arms that I truly felt like I was finally home. I buried my nose into her neck, breathing in her unique scent and kissed the skin beneath my lips, my tongue instinctively coming out to taste…. I've always loved the taste of her skin.

"I love you…" I kissed her jaw. "I love you." I kissed her cheek. "I love you." I kissed behind her ear. I couldn't stop… It had been so long. The longer my nose breathed in her scent, the more worked up I got. Feeling her soft skin under my hands once more was like heaven. I looked up from her neck and our eyes connected; I could see so much in them. Her lips parted, drawing my eyes… I couldn't help but touch them.

Nearly every night of my imprisonment, I'd dreamt of this… It was scary to now have it within reach. What if I was actually dreaming? I'd die…

But when I kissed her, everything in my world fell into place… It was like of those ghost movies where furniture is lifted off the ground, hovering…. Then all at once, it all falls to the ground! It was real, she was real, and I was here. My heart clenched.

"I've missed you so much, my love…" I could hardly get the words past the lump in my throat. "So very, very much. Picturing you in my mind kept me alive, kept me from giving up, so many times. I couldn't just die…" She gasped at my admission and her eyes clouded with a memory that I hadn't been a part of, a memory I wasn't sure I wanted to be a part of.

"I nearly died without you… My heart did…" she cried.

"I'm so sorry, you'll never know how much. I'm so glad you held on for me Rose, so glad…"

"I need you…" I need you too baby…

"You have me. Forever."

I took my time, slowly reconnecting our hearts, souls and bodies with tender kisses and touches, whispered apologies and promises of better days ahead of us. Tomorrow, I would try to let her know how much our separation had changed me. Tomorrow I would let her know that I wanted to start the family she'd wanted so much, but my career forestalled. Tomorrow… tomorrow I would apologise for risking everything that meant so much to us and start showing her that from now on, she was the only thing in my life I would fight for.

I knew the scars of the last eight months would take a long time to heal, if ever, but I would be here every step of the way; I would never leave her side again… for anything.

Especially now… now that I had her back in my arms…

Sooooo? Natalie's a good girl in this one... Yay! But her father is still a creep, dictated by tradition... Anyway, to alleviate some of your fears, I will finish Achilles! I will NOT abandon it. I've just had a lot going on in RL and a major case of writers block with it and as you all know, writing can't be forced... (Especially with Achilles) So I want to thank you all for your patience...

Sandy xxx