warnings: OOCness, crack, mutilation of canon.

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BOOM, HEADSHOT!

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INTERLUDE: The key to a successful workplace is a well-balanced team!

M-21 made his first move during school hours, because there was nothing like getting an early start on things. And, y'know, because it made it less likely anyone else could get to her first.

Su-Yi. A loyal and steadfast friend, who would doubtless never dream of hurting or betraying her companions in real life. In a videogame... M-21 figured he could make it worth her while. Frankenstein gave impressive salaries to his security team, and even idols had to watch their bank-balances, especially considering how short their shelf-lives were – Su-Yi had more than enough intelligence to realize that.

Mindful of Tao's cameras, M-21 scribbled the suggestion for an alliance down on a piece of paper and had it sent to her during lunch, by way of several students who would doubtless fool Tao into thinking it was merely another love letter or whatever crap kids these days sent each other.

His estimation of Su-Yi's intelligence went up further once her own letter found itself slipped back to him by a pimply nerd just an hour later, with the asking price doubled and a demand that Yuna would (unwittingly – the girl was really too nice to be trusted with this) come under their protection. Or else she'd go straight to the boys – who'd doubtless speak about it on camera and let Tao know he was up to something.

M-21 winced at the punch to his bank account, reminded himself that he'd done well enough without money before, and gave her a slight nod when they passed in the corridor. No need to worry about Su-Yi's life once her career faded – she'd probably be holding a business empire in her iron fist before she was twenty.

… Or a crime empire. Personally, he was betting on the latter.

xxx

Su-Yi – recruited. Yuna – unfortunate necessity, but hopefully protecting her wouldn't slow them down too much. At the very least, she'd be a useful bullet-sponge, like Raizel-nim.

Now there was a sentence he'd have to make sure never to even think in front of Frankenstein.

Sighing, M-21 settled down on his bed and rubbed his forehead. Maybe Yuna would be useful – would Han Shinwoo really shoot her, or was he an equal-opportunity gunman in the world of online gaming? No – he needed to stop thinking about this. There were still two days before the deathmatch begun, and he had more important things to do. Massively important things. Incredibly important things.

He took one look at the printed maps of the Golden Dawn levels sitting on his bedside cabinet, only half-memorised and, face stoic, resisted the urge to cry when he realisedhis main ambition at the moment wasn't to find his name, the identities of his old comrades, or even to complete a n important mission. It was to kick Tao's ass in a videogame.

When the hell did his life become so stupid?

xxx

After school, it was normal for the kids to take their time getting home, maybe swing by somewhere for a snack or drink, and today was no different. What was different was that Su-Yi gave a low huff after looking over the drinks menu and proclaimed that if the boys were any kind of gentlemen, they could place the ladies' orders for them. Generally Su-Yi didn't give a damn about that kind of idiocy, but when it worked for her, she was happy to abuse it.

While the boys groaned and headed to the counter, it wasn't hard to get rid of Yuna either, having made sure to prevent her from going to the bathroom before leaving school. A girl had needs after all, especially when she didn't have to explain her disappearance to the currently-absent boys, and Yuna vanished to the bathroom quickly enough.

The café was devoid of Tao's cameras, which Su-Yi wasn't aware of – but she was being paid enough that she was happy to pay attention to M-21's instructions from the note, and not go elsewhere.

She set down her cup, smiled charmingly at the boys who were still ordering at the counter (so easy to get rid of!) and said to Rai, "So in the next Golden Dawn deathmatch; how would you like to survive far longer than before, hm?"

Raizel raised an eyebrow (so gracefully!), set his cup down (so smoothly!) and steepled his fingers together (so questioningly! … Go with it.).

Su-Yi smiled, thoughts of designer clothes and a new sports car for her mother flitting through her head while she explained exactly what ajussi wanted. Boys were just too easy once you knew what they wanted.

Teammate acquired.

xxx

The room was darkened, lit only by the soft glow of five computer screens lining the walls, casting flickers across Tao's face as he peered at them. Cast almost in shadow next to him was a chessboard, set up with only the one king and a multitude of pawns.

"Soon, my pretty," he whispered, reaching down to pet the furry creature settled on his lap. It blinked at him with wide eyes, flicking its ears. "Soon M-21 will learn the folly of his deeds – soon, he'll learn never to resist my power. For in this world of gaming -" He cackled – the beast in his lap made a curious noise – and Tao reached a hand to the side, smile feral as he plucked the king from it square and used it to flick a pawn onto its side, uncaring. "Yes, in this world of gaming... I am the ki- OWFUCK OW OW OW."

Takeo stood in the open doorway, not particularly bothered by the way the light he'd just switched on was attacking Tao's sight, and ignored the way the shorter man was flailing and grabbing at his eye-sockets, whining piteously. You'd have thought he was melting from the way he was acting.

"Tao, dinner's ready. Are you trying to be dramatic again? And..." Takeo frowned. "Is that a Furby in your lap?"

Tao, peeling a hand away from his face, squinted down at the creature, which burbled happily up at him. "No. I'm just happy to see you."

The way Takeo enunciated sheer judgement in his silence was, Tao reflected, amazing.

xxx

"Seriously," Frankenstein muttered from basement sub-level 12, as he slaved over a hot experiment (for SCIENCE!1!). It was hard sometimes, having hearing beyond mortal ken, harder still since everyone had suddenly started moving in, but now? This week, unable to ignore the crap everyone was coming out with? "Has everyone here gone insane and I somehow missed it?"

No, he realized, as he measured the reactions of the control sample against the almost-depleted uranium. The simple truth was that everyone in the house except he and his Master were morons.

Frankenstein smiled, pleased with his deduction. Another mystery solved. For SCIENCE!

… What was a Furby, anyway?