Author's Note: This is set at the end of Homecoming, under the assumption that Katherine didn't call. Yes, it's stereotypical, and yes, I realize that it is probably better that she DID call, because if the following story actually happened, then we'd have no wonderful Delena tension for the rest of the series. Shut up and let me have my fun please. And I'm going from Elena's POV because while I think I have a good idea of how he'd react, I have NO idea what he'd be thinking.
"Hey. Hey, Damon, listen to me!"
As soon as she put her hands on him, turned him around, and found herself staring into his sterling eyes, Elena knew she should back the hell up. Tell him exactly what she needed to tell him, but from at least two feet away. There were two problems with this, however. One: Damon needed to be calmed down, and he always seemed to listen better when she was close, and preferably touching him (No, she did NOT want to think about what that implied). Two: when she got this close to Damon, she found it hard to do whatever it was she knew she should do. Especially if it entailed getting AWAY from Damon. So, essentially she was stuck. Awesome.
She took a breath, and held on to him, forcing him to look at her. Her fingers were burning where she was touching his skin, and his eyes felt like they were burning straight into her core. Breath, like it always did when she was this close to him, suddenly seemed very hard to come by. "We'll survive this," she told him quietly. She tried to convey to him a sense of calm that she did not feel. "We always survive," she continued in a whisper.
Damon shifted under her hands, and she felt him take a shaky breath. She gripped him slightly tighter in case he tried to pull away, causing him to look at her. She tried to think of something that would get him to listen. In the end, all she could say was "Trust me."
He looked at her, startling eyes full of pain, fear, and anger. It hurt her, almost physically, to see him like this. But when he spoke, his voice was at least calm. "We're never getting Stefan back. You know that, don't you?" He spoke softly, like he didn't want to hurt her.
Elena exhaled sharply. Yes, she did know that. And it still hurt like a bitch. But she had already started letting go of Stefan, whether she realized it or not. Now, it was time to make it final. "Then we'll let him go." He looked at her, startled. "Okay? We'll have to let him go." Her voice cracked slightly on the last part, but she still managed to stay steady in her statement.
Damon stared down at her, though Elena felt like he was staring into her, like he was trying to decide if she meant it. "Elena…" he breathed, almost in a protestation.
She cut him off. "No, Damon. I told you we would survive. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. We have to let him go. There is no other way."
He shook his head slightly, and when she opened her mouth to protest, he put his first two fingers on her lips, silencing her. With his other hand, he reached up and took one of her hands off his neck and held it loosely. She felt goosebumps erupt on the back of her neck and arm. "Elena, I know what you're saying and I understand. But this is something you've been working at for months now. I'm not sure you'll be able to let it go that easily."
Elena looked down. She inhaled deeply, and heard how shaky her breath was. Of course he didn't believe her. Hell, she wouldn't believe her if she was him. She felt him shift, and the hand that was on her lips moved to under her chin, tilting her head back to look at him. "Elena?"
Twin tears pricked in the corner of both eyes, but she refused to let them spill. "Damon, I don't have a choice. I'm not going to spend my life pining for a man who doesn't, who CAN'T love me anymore. And…" she took a deep breath, and then said something she had only just realized. "I can't honestly say I love him anymore. After everything he's done. I know it wasn't really him, but he can turn his humanity back on, and he hasn't. Even if I did get him back… I'd never trust him again."
Damn. She could feel the tears slipping down her cheeks, despite her attempts to hold them in. Her hands dropped limply to her side, and though she couldn't turn her head, she looked away from Damon as her tears continued to fall. She didn't want him to see her cry.
It was Damon's turn to touch her. He raised both hands to cup her face in them, and despite everything, Elena could still feel his touch in her core. She felt his thumbs brush away the tears from her cheek. "Elena… I am sorry. Truly. If I could, I would take away every painful thing that has happened to you in the past few months…"
Elena smiled slightly and met his gaze again. "I know you would."
And then the tension started. It always seemed to happen like this; serious conversation ends with them standing extremely close, eyes locked on each other, and all is completely silent. They both feel it; they both acknowledge it. But Elena is always too afraid to act on it, and Damon won't do a damn thing without full consent. And so they are stuck like this. Her eyes drop to his lips, and his to hers. And he always is the one to save her in moments like this from herself. "Want a glass?" he asked, letting go of her suddenly, and picking up the glass of bourbon he left on the fireplace.
Elena took a deep breath, trying to ignore how cold she suddenly felt despite the roaring fire next to her. She looked at the glass, and then at him, and smiled slightly. "Sure. God knows I'm not going home tonight."
They both knew what she meant. Now, more than ever, did she need to be close to Damon. For her actual safety, and for her own mental wellbeing. He poured her a glass, and they both sat on the couch. Damon offered her a shadow of his lopsided smirk. "So…"
A few hours and more than a few drinks later, Elena was leaning against Damon's headboard with a cloudy head and a relaxed smile. In a small corner of her mind, she knew perfectly well this good mood wouldn't last, and that it was the result of alcohol and present company. But she could handle that. Tomorrow would come when it did. They were currently watching the first movie she had found in Damon's collection, and one that she was teasing him mercilessly for having.
"Gone With the Wind, Damon? Seriously?"
Damon was lying down, one arm behind his head, one on his stomach. He looked up at her with a mock insulted look. "Elena, just because it's old doesn't mean it isn't still awesome. I mean, look at me!" he said, doing the little "eye thing" that caused butterflies to spontaneously generate in her stomach.
She just rolled her eyes at him. "But it's so… sappy. And not Damon-y."
He laughed the closest thing to a laugh she ever got out of him. Still, it was more than anyone else could get. "Damon-y? I'm pretty sure that's not an actual adjective. And believe it or not, you don't actually know everything about me. I've had over a century and a half to refine my tastes. In 1939, movies were new, so I didn't have a lot to go on." When she continued to laugh, he pushed her lightly. "Shut up. It stuck with me."
She grinned at him and turned the TV off as the movie ended. "Sure, sure, tough guy. Whatever you say."
He cocked an eyebrow at her. "You calling me a wimp?" he questioned in a low voice that had a slightly husky quality to it.
Elena ignored the heat that suddenly appeared in her stomach, telling herself it was the bourbon. "Well I don't see how anyone who watches old romance movies can be that much of a badass."
She didn't see it coming; how could she, considering how fast he moved? One moment she was sitting in the bed, and then all she heard was a growl and rushing air, and she was against a wall, arms above her head, Damon standing way, way, way to close to her body. She couldn't breathe, and it had nothing to do with the sudden attack. He smirked down at her. "Now, what were you saying?" he asked in a low, velvet voice.
Elena closed her eyes. This was normal, he screws with her like this all the time, her heart should not be pounding like this, especially when she knew he could hear it. She knew how she was supposed to react. She was supposed to tease and banter. Okay. She could do this. Opening her eyes, she laughed up at him. "That you seem like a pretty wimpy vampire to me."
He grinned in a predatory way at her, and she watched as the veins appeared and his eyes turned dark with bloodlust. Strangely enough, she wasn't frightened. She knew he wouldn't hurt her. Thinking he was going to stop with the "gross face" as she had once called it, she opened her mouth and took a breath to talk- and then sharply exhaled as he lowered his mouth to the place where her neck met her shoulders. She felt his fangs against her skin; not piercing, but very, very much there.
Elena's heart rate doubled, and her breathing quickened and became very shallow. But still, it wasn't from fear. Goose bumps erupted on her neck and heat flashed down her body as she heard him speak and felt his breath against her skin. "Now, Elena. What were you saying?"
She fought for air to speak with. "I… don't remember now… Something about you being a wimp?"
That's when he bit her. Except, in all the times she had been bitten, it was nothing like this. For one, she wasn't fighting against it, nor was she scared. But more importantly, it felt amazing. He was biting in one area of her neck that was extremely sensitive, and it wasn't hard enough to be excruciating. She felt him pierce her skin and begin to drink, but she still wasn't scared. It felt like… like a love bite. Like a form of extremely erotic, vampire-on-human foreplay.
That thought sent heat straight down her body to the place between her legs.
Damon's fangs withdrew, and Elena had to bite her lip to keep from whimpering as he licked the area clean of blood and then, so lightly she wasn't sure it happened, kiss it. He then raised his gaze to meet hers, smirking. "And now?" he asked in a low, quiet voice.
Elena gulped down air like a drowning person. "That you are a terrifying, badass vampire."
He grinned. "That's what I thought."
And suddenly, they were in the "tension" position again. Only this time, they were both slightly drunk, and now she knew, based on the way his eyes widened and darkened and his nostrils flared that he could smell her arousal. His hands loosened their grip on her wrists, which dropped to her side. She could tell she had about ten seconds, possibly less, before he made a joke and pulled away. Only this time, she was very, very sure she didn't want him to pull away. As she felt his body shift to move, she put her hands on his chest, taking hold of his shirt, and whispered, "Damon…"
He froze. Elena looked up at him. His body was shifted slightly away, but his gaze was burning into her. She opened her mouth to speak, but found she couldn't think of what to say. So she did the only thing that came to mind.
She kissed him.
At first, it was much like when she had kissed him when he was dying. Soft, hesitant, and unreciprocated. Only this time he wasn't dying, so he could reciprocate, and the fact that he wasn't made Elena very self conscious. When she started to pull away, however, his lips followed hers. They moved with each other in a very gentle, slow rhythm. That pace quickened, however, when Elena's hands traveled up Damon's chest and tangled themselves in his hair. He groaned deep in the back of his throat and put one arm around her waist, pulling her to him, and cupped the other hand behind her neck, tilting her head so he could get a better angle. His tongue swiped across her lower lip, and she opened her mouth to him with a slight gasp. He growled slightly as their tongues briefly fought for dominance, but Damon was always one to be in control.
Elena quickly lost herself in the kiss, and all she knew was Damon's scent, the feel of his body, and the fact that she wanted more. As her hands slid up under his shirt, however, he jerked back suddenly. She felt rejection wash over her like cold water, and she crossed her arms over her stomach. "I'm sorry," she stuttered, looking down, and tried to move around him. "I don't know what that… I shouldn't have… I should go."
She got about halfway across the room when he stopped her. He put his hands on her shoulders, and she could feel that he was shaking. "Elena, wait."
She shifted under his hands. "I get it, Damon. You didn't want to wait as I searched for your brother. You've moved on. That's fine, I'm happy for you. But I should go…"
"Elena. Shut up." Damon's tone seemed vaguely amused, but also slightly annoyed. She looked up at him, startled. "I'm a vampire. We don't 'move on' like humans can do. When we fall in love, we're sort of stuck. And I do love you, Elena."
She tilted her head, confused. "Damon, I don't understand…"
He smiled slightly and cupped her face. "Then listen. I love you, Elena. I have since I thought I kissed you and it was Katherine, and I realized that the only person, even with her back, that I wanted to kiss was you." Damon paused, taking a deep breath. "But you are, or were, in love with my brother. And if I am going to have you, I can't be the one you settle for when you're alone, then go running back to Stefan. It is entirely possible that I will lose my damn mind."
He let go of her, and stepped back. Elena could see the pain in his eyes as he moved away to his dresser to pour another glass of bourbon. He looked back at her once it was poured and leaned against the dresser. He nodded his head to the door. "You can leave if you want. No hard feelings."
Elena looked at him for a long moment, and then slowly walked towards him. He straightened slightly, but still held his glass, almost as a barrier. She stopped right in front of him, and took the glass from his hand. "I don't love Stefan, anymore. I told you this. He hasn't been there for me these past months. He hasn't been the one to save me, and to make me feel safe. You have. So I'm not 'settling' for you. I want you, Damon. Only you."
She could see his fear as Damon's sterling eyes searched her own, looking for any sign of hesitation. And then suddenly, his lips came crashing down on hers.
Elena gasped, and reached up, fisting her hands into his hair. He gripped her waist tightly and turned, lifting her smoothly onto his dresser. She wrapped her legs tightly around his waist, and his hands traveled up her sides, across her back, and then back down her side, feeling every curve of her body. One hand gripped her hips tightly, and the other brushed lightly across her breast, asking for permission. In response, Elena moaned slightly and tilted her head back. Not missing a beat, Damon trailed his lips down her neck, finding the spot he had bitten earlier, and latching onto it, alternating between biting and sucking. He slipped his hand up her shirt and found her breast. Reaching around, he unhooked her bra, and then he went back and cupped her breast, smiling against her neck as he heard her his. And when he pinched her nipple and she arched her back suddenly with a small whimper, he leaned back, smirking at her.
She growled in a low voice, "Shut up and just take it off me."
Damon seemed slightly surprised, but she could tell by the way his eyes turned from silver to storm grey that he was not turned off. She lifted her arms and he pulled her shirt over her head. As he threw it to the ground, he looked back at her and inhaled sharply. "Mother of God, Elena… You're beautiful."
She blushed slightly but only tugged at his shirt in response. As he pulled it over his head and she got a look at his body, she smirked. "So are you."
He waggled his eyebrows at her, and then suddenly she was lying on her back on his bed, Damon ranging over her, the predatory look back in his eyes, and suddenly she couldn't breathe again. She raised her head slightly to kiss him, but he just went straight to her neck. She sighed, running one hand down his back, another through his hair. As he began to kiss lower, however, the sighs turned into soft gasps, gasps that he seemed to take great pleasure in eliciting from her. When his mouth locked around one of her nipples, she arched her back and emitted a low moan, one Damon was quite intent on hearing again. One hand massaging the breast his mouth was not on, he shifted his body slightly to allow his other hand between them, and pressed his fingers against her core over top of her jeans.
Elena moaned again, and gasped out, "Damon!"
He looked up from his mouths current occupation, a small smile on his face. "Yes, Elena?" As he spoke, his fingers curled against her, causing her to whimper again.
She looked down at him. "Please…" she whimpered, and then groaned as his smile only grew more devilish.
He curled his hand against her again, earning a slight buck of her hips. "Please what, Elena?"
Elena tried to catch her breath to speak, and he was making it very difficult with his ministrations. "Please, Damon… Touch me."
Elena could never figure out how he did it, but somehow, her jeans were unbuttoned and off of her in a blink of an eye, and she didn't hear a single tear, and she had barely felt a thing. Damon raised himself back up to Elena's mouth, and his fingers lightly stroked against the outside of her underwear. She whimpered again, and then moved one hand down to attempt to unbutton his jeans. "Ah ah, no," he murmured, taking both of her wrists and pinning them above her head. "This is my time to love you."
Elena shivered slightly as he moved away from her slightly, sliding her panties down her legs until she could kick him off. Trailing his fingers up the inside of her thigh, he moved over top of her again, and kissed along her jaw line as he lightly ran a finger up her wet slit. She moaned even louder, pushing her hips against his hand. He smiled, and as he pushed a finger into her core, he covered her mouth with his, swallowing her small cry. He began to lightly stroke and pump her, and as he kissed and nipped his way down her neck, he whispered in a hoarse voice, "Jesus Christ, Elena…"
She would have responded in some witty way, except he had just inserted another finger, knocking the breath out of her, and causing her to arch her hips against his hand. Her breathing became increasingly more ragged as Damon continued to pump in and out of her at an increased pace. She felt the wave building inside of her, and moaned loudly, wrenching one hand out of Damon's grasp (he was slightly distracted) and used it to pull him down to her. Tangling her hands in his hair, she kissed up and down his shoulder, sucked the skin below his neck, but what really caught his attention was when she grazed her teeth against the same area he'd bitten her earlier, and then sunk her teeth in.
Elena was rewarded with the first Damon moan of the night.
His fingers suddenly picked up pace inside of her, and she bit harder into him to prevent herself from actually screaming. She felt herself on the edge, and was about to lose it if she didn't get some relief. And then his thumb found her clit, and teased it, and she lost it. Throwing her head back against the pillow, she moaned in a low, guttural tone that caused Damon to shudder against her neck.
As Elena caught her breath, Damon pulled his hand away and wiped it on the sheets, and then pulled her tightly into his arms and kissed her. This kiss was soft and slow and so sweet it almost broke her heart. Elena had always imagined kissing Damon as rough, wild, animalistic. Now she knew that while it certainly could be, that wasn't the only side to him.
Smiling, Elena pushed at Damon's chest. He rolled over, and she moved to lay on top of him. He swallowed heavily as her dark eyes twinkled up at him, but he didn't get her intentions until she moved her kisses from just his shoulder and chest to down his body. "Elena…"
"Hmn?" she hummed, looking up at him while her mouth still moved farther down his body.
She could see him fighting to keep his voice steady. "What are you doing?"
She grinned. "What does it look like I'm doing?" she asked as her nimble fingers began working on his belt buckle.
And then she was on her back, Damon once again on top of her and pinning her hands. She frowned. "What?"
"Not tonight," he murmured, kissing along her jaw line and up to her ear.
"Why not?" she pouted.
He raised his head and smiled slightly at her, but his expression became serious. "You don't love me." It wasn't a question.
Elena shuddered and looked down. "No… I don't, Damon."
She expected him to pull away, but he didn't. Instead, he raised her chin to make him look at her. "Do you think you will?"
She looked at him for a long moment. "Yes. I'm not in love with Stefan anymore. And you are here for me and are a friend and someone who loves me and protects me. If you give me time, I know I will love you."
Damon smiled. "Good. That's all I needed to her." He resumed kissing along her neck.
Elena frowned. "Then why won't you have sex with me?"
"Because I don't want to have sex with you."
Elena jerked away from him, stung. She tried to get him off her, but he raised his face and saw her expression. "Elena Gilbert, you are too damn sensitive," he said, amused. Suddenly his eyes went smoky, and she felt him press his own hard member to her core. She could feel it through her jeans and she groaned as it caused a new throbbing to rise in her. "Of course I want you. But I don't want our first time to be sex." His eyes went softer than she had ever seen them. "I want to make love with you, Elena. I want to give you all of me, and I want to take all of you. And until I can get that, I will wait for you."
Elena felt tears spring in her eyes and she reached up touched his face lightly. She kissed him very lightly, and then whispered, "I don't know how long that will be. Are you okay with that?"
Damon laughed. "Elena, I have waited for you for almost a year when I wasn't even supposed to be. Now that I have an excuse, I will wait as long as I have to for you."
Another Author's Note: That was the first remotely smutty scene I have ever written. If you don't like smut, I don't care. If you do like smut, you should send me a review and tell me how I did and offer suggestions. Also, if you think I should change the rating to M, let me know. Kthanks. :)
