Alas, I am not dead!

I've just been very busy lately, especially with work. I've been working 60 hour weeks, so it's been kinda hard to get anything else done. But I had some time today, so I decided to get caught up a little.

This little fic is based off what happened to me a few weeks ago. I thought it would make a funny story, so here it is :) Enjoy!

Disclaimer: The right's didn't come with my DVD... so I guess that means I still don't own "Hetalia"...

Ludwig had had a long day; nothing had gone right at the office, his car had gotten stuck in the mud on the way out of the parking lot, causing him to get out and having to push it down the street until it gained traction, messing up his very expensive suit. The paperwork he had gotten hammered with was sitting on his desk in a messy pile after someone had brought in a fan (the air conditioning had been broken at the office, did he mention that?) to cool him down and it had blown all his forms all over the place. He had spent the remainder of the day trying to sort everything back out, but it was in vain. At five, his boss had come in and told him to go home, that he could finish up tomorrow.

So the last thing the blonde German had wanted when he came home was too see his elder brother, clad in American football shoulder pads and shin guards, a hockey mask covering his face and a roll of newspaper clutched to his chest, sitting on the floor to the entrance of the living room in the hall.

Ludwig blinked when he nearly walked over Gilbert, who gazed up at him with his red eyes, fringes of his silver hair visible underneath the helmet.

The two stared at each other for a moment in silence before Gilbert said something.

"There's a bee in the house," he stated, matter-of-factly, as if that explained everything.

The tall blonde blinked. "Uh… okay…"

Gilbert watched him for a moment before his head snapped back to the living room. He cocked his head to the side, listening intently, before turning his attention back to his brother.

"He's in the living room," he elaborated.

Ludwig ran an eye over his brother for a third time. "Bruder, why are you dressed like that?"

"Did you not hear me, West?" Gilbert asked, a scowl on his face. "There's a bee in the living room. No way am I going to sit here unprotected from him!"

The younger of the two continued to stare, his exhausted brain trying to catch up with the events going on.

"Bruder, it's a bee," he said, loosening his tie around his neck. "Give it a day, and it'll be dead, anyways."

Gilbert shook his head (where had he gotten that get-up anyways?) and frowned. "No, West! That little sneak invaded our house! HE WILL PERISH!"

Deciding to let his brother alone – he seemed content enough and he wasn't being annoying – Ludwig sighed. "I'm just gonna-"

"SHHH!" his brother insisted, waving a hand up and down to emphasize his point as he gave the living room his full intention. From inside, Ludwig could hear a faint buzzing sound before it stopped completely.

"He's on the move," Gilbert told him, and stood up, crouched down. He snapped the visor of the hockey mask down in place. "Get to a safe place, kleine bruder," he said. He narrowed his eyes. "I'm goin' in."

Ludwig watched, slightly amused, as Gilbert rolled on the ground in a somersault and came up on his feet in the center of the living room, newspaper roll held tightly in his fist, arm outstretched. He turned in a slow circle around the room, eyes trying to figure out where the buzzing was coming from, having started up again.

As his brother "bee hunted" downstairs, Ludwig had become aware of an uncomfortable feeling in his lower regions and hurried to the bathroom. After doing his business and washing his hands, he quickly changed into his pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, hearing Gilbert yell battle cries from the downstairs. When he returned to ground level, he peeked his head around the corner to check on the damage his brother was inflicting.

It looked as though Gilbert was actually being careful and trying not to hit anything besides the small insect. He watched as Gilbert slowly approached the window, before jumping back with a yelp as a small buzzing was heard and the bee took off to another part of the room, the albino dancing out of its way as it flew near him.

Ludwig shook his head and made his way to the kitchen to grab some dinner. His brother's yelps and cries continued for the remainder of the better part of an hour as Ludwig read the paper while he ate. When the noise had quieted down for quite some time, Ludwig got up and rinsed his plate off, heading to the living room to see what the situation was.

Gilbert was kneeling on the floor, helmet visor up, newspaper lying beside him. He had his bent forward and his eyes were closed.

"Bruder?" he asked, worry taking hold.

"Shh!" the Prussian said loudly. He opened an eye and glared at the blonde through his silver bangs. "We must give a moment of silence for Walter."

Ludwig's brow furrowed. "Uh… what? Who's Walter?"

"The enemy!" Gilbert glared. The his face turned solemn again as he looked back down to the floor. "Walter. You were a good soldier and you fought valiantly, you sneaky bastard. However, you stood no chance against the awesomeness of Gilbert Beilschmidt!"

Realizing that "Walter" was the name Gilbert had given the bee had, it appeared, killed at last, Ludwig shook his head. One of the dogs brushed past him and trotted to Gilbert's side, where it sniffed at the newspaper and then the dead bee before licking up the immobile insect and swallowing it whole.

Gilbert cried out in protest as the dog wagged its tail happily, the albino lecturing it on how that was not the proper burial for a warrior, no matter if it was an enemy or not.

Ludwig decided, as he turned around to make his way back to the kitchen to pick up his book, that his brother was crazy.

Though, perhaps it was some of his own fault.

Sometimes, it was simply better not to ask, at least where Gilbert was concerned.

Yes. I spent an hour and a half tracking a bee that had somehow gotten in around my house. I wasn't as decked out as Gilbo was, but I was armed with a notepad and a newspaper. The stupid bee had me running all over the house, and I basically did what our lovable Prussian did. My dad was a little concerned for my mental health.

Unfortunately, Walter, (yes, I even named him Walter) was able to escape my house. He flew onto the screen in our back door and when I trapped him, he flew out the tiny crack in the back and made it out alive. Rest assured, he will not be so lucky next time. I just thought that having the dog eat the bee after Gil was trying to give him a soldier's goodbye would bee (haha. See what I did there?) funnier.

Okay, I've officially been at work way too long... I'm going to bed, now.

If you review, Gil will come to your house to hunt your bees too. Flames will result in the BTT hiding an entire bee hive in your living room.