Bold – Flashback

"Italics"- Thoughts

Disclaimer- I own nothing besides the plot.

The brown haired man sat in the corner of the unlit room, his frail shoulders shaking, tears streaming down his tan cheeks. Was it regret that he felt? Iruka shook his head, no, he was not wrong. It was right to push him away. What would people say if they knew that the famous copy-nin had a man, Iruka, as a lover?

"I cannot go back to him. I will tarnish his reputation, his status in Konoha." Iruka whispered, trying to reassure himself that his actions were right.

Iruka closed his eyes. Fragments from their fight months earlier flew into his mind. The look on Kakashi's eyes, his words, all was etched deeply inside Iruka's heart.

"You hate being around me that much huh? Maybe I should just disappear from your life." The words had pierced through Iruka's heart. How could Iruka tell Kakashi that he was embarrassed, not for himself, but for the older man. A gay ninja would cause so much controversy and Kakashi was not just any ninja, he was a powerful and well known elite shinobi of Konoha.

The silence from Iruka hurt Kakashi more than any physical pain he had ever endured. "From today on, I will be out of your life. No one in Konoha will ever know of our relationship." Kakashi said, angry tears threatening to fall. He turned around and was gone in seconds.

Iruka had fallen to the floor, sobbing his heart out. Although in pain, he felt relief rush over him. Kakashi was now safe from society's criticism and he would find a beautiful wife and have wonderful children. Kakashi would live the life Iruka could never give him.

The next day Kakashi had taken an S-rank mission and was out of Konoha. Iruka was glad to not have to face the silver haired man. He wanted time to keep his love for Kakashi locked up and put away. 'When you love someone, you should want the best for them right? I can never give him the perfect life.' Iruka reminded himself.

But soon enough, Iruka began to worry. "What is taking Kakashi so long?""Is he safe?""Is he injured?Hurt?""Oh god, please don't let him be captured by the enemy." These thoughts had ran through Iruka's mind. Days turned to weeks and weeks turned into months and Iruka's worries increased.

He began to eat less and less and staying in more and more, locking himself inside the confines of his house. His once healthy build was gone, replaced with an alarming thin and frail body. The lack of sunshine he received turned Iruka's trademark tan skin into an unrecognizable pale complexion.

Friends began to worry but Iruka brushed them off. Many times did Naruto come bursting through Iruka's doors demanding that the academy teacher come out to enjoy the sunshine, only to have Iruka reject softly.

Iruka snapped his head up. His instincts told him he was not alone in his house. Iruka quickly wiped away his tears and stood up. Quietly and swiftly, Iruka moved towards the presence. Iruka frowned. The intruder's chakra felt so familiar, so intimate. Then it struck Iruka and he raced down the hallway, not caring that he knocked over a coffee table or breaking a vase along the way.

Iruka froze upon reaching his living room. 'It's him. It's really him'.

Kakashi stood in the middle of Iruka's living room, haboring an odd posture. "…Ruka." The copy-nin whispered before staggering forward.

Iruka snapped out of his trance and raced forward to catch the falling man, struggling. The months of not eating really took a toll on his strength. 'He's hurt. He's hurt. He's hurt.' Iruka repeated frantically in his mind. 'Blood. Blood. Blood. Kakashi's blood.' Iruka examined Kakashi, trying to find the source of all the blood. His hand rested upon Kakashi's head and felt the unnaturally soft spot, Kakashi's wince confirmed it.

"Kakashi, you baka. Why didn't you head straight to the hospital or Tsunade?" Iruka said trying to maneuver the larger man so that he could transport them into the hospital.

"Iruka….I-I can't…..I c-can't do i-it…I can't l-leave you-" Kakashi muttered in Iruka's ear.

Iruka bit his lip, his heart aching.

The door opened and Iruka jumped up from his seat, latching onto Tsunade's arm, "Is he alright? Nothing's seriously injured right? Right?" Iruka desperately asked.

"Kakashi's alright bu-" That was all Tsunade managed to say before Iruka rushed passed the Hokage into the room, forgetting all manners he usually showed before Tsunade.

Kakashi sat on the bed in the all white room, excluding the bandages wrapped around his head, he looked fine and relief washed over Iruka. He slowly approached Kakashi, his hand reaching out to touch the tightly wrapped bandages.

"Iru-" Before Kakashi could say anything, Iruka pulled the injured man into a tight embrace, tears streaming down his cheeks. "I'm so glad you're ok."

Moments passed before anyone spoke up. "Iruka sensei, not that I'm complaining, but what triggerred this lovely adoration you have towards me?" Kakashi asks with a hint of amusement and tease in his voice before placing an arm around the chuunin.

Iruka sensei? Sensei? Kakashi stopped with the formalities a week after they started dating. Iruka released Kakashi and looked into the other man's eyes. These weren't the eyes Kakashi used to look at Iruka with. The intimacy and love in them were gone. "Kakashi…?" Iruka breathed, utterly confused.

Tsunade took that moment to enter the room, irritation apparent in her forever young face. "Iruka sensei, you didn't let me finish talking." She said before ushering Iruka out the door and closing it.

"Hokage sama, Kakashi doesn-" Iruka began but Tsunade stopped him. "I know."

"What's wrong with him?"

"He was hit beheind the head, fracturing his skull and injuring the part of his cerebrum that controlled his memory. In short, Kakashi is suffering from memory loss. He believes we are livng in 2010 right now. He has no memory of the past year."

Iruka inhaled sharply. Memory loss? "Will he be able to regain his memory?" Iruka managed to ask.

"With the damage I can see, I doubt Kakashi is able to. He's very lucky to only have memory loss, a little more to the right and he would be paralyzed."

"I still need to read over his mission report. Don't stay too long. Kakashi needs a lot of rest." Tsunade said before heading towards the exit.

Iruka could only nod, speechless.

'Kakashi has no memory of our time doesn't remember me. He doesn't remember us.' Iruka laughed bitterly. 'This is what I wanted, wasn't it? Without remembering anything, Kakashi would be able to continue his life the way it should happen.'

First time writing, please don't be too harsh. ^^