Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy XIII or any of the characters, places or events depicted therein, all credit goes towards Square Enix and their affiliates.
Summary: AU. Post-FFXIII; non FFXIII-2 compliant. Lightning loved her, unbearably and completely, and she always would. But she just couldn't do it anymore.
Author's Note: I took a few liberties, changed the story a little. No much, though. The reason it's listed as an AU is to comply with the fact that FFXIII-2 will eventually be out, and people will probably complain. Meh. Anyway, figured I owed you guys something. It came out much shorter than I intended, but I do love the start of it very much. As with all stories, it's still special to me. Also, as a side note, is it just me, or do I love one word titles?
Situation
Slim fingers touched to the crystal cheek, eyes gently caressing the features she had come to memorize a thousand times over. In one hand Lightning Farron carried a single rose, in the other, her heart. Blue eyes she thought could cry no more tears continued to traitorously leak, like a loose faucet in need of repair.
Letting her hand fall away, Lightning locked a one-sided gaze with eyes that had always been full of passion and excitement, of lust for life, now as blank as stone. It hurt to look, to come bear her heart to a statue, knowing that the woman encased inside had chosen another over her. The day they, Fang and Vanille—not her, never her—called upon Ragnarok, the day they completed their Focus…it had been the best and worst day of her life, all rolled into one.
Her eyes drifted, moved, and felt something strike a chord in her heart. Looking at the tiny figure braced next to Fang, next to the woman she loved, Lightning felt a pit of jealousy so deep it startled her well up inside. What would her life had been like if Fang had chosen her instead of Vanille? Would she still be with her now, alive and well within the restraints of crystal statis.
Shaking her head to dispel any thoughts, and the tears streaking lightly down her cheeks, Lightning returned her eyes to Fang's cold ones.
"I'm not doing this anymore."
There was no response, only whispering silence, the whistle of the wind as it passed by the cradle that played home to the two crystalline women.
"I can't do this anymore."
There was a certain tone to Lightning voice, a melancholy that would have seemed so out of place were there anyone around to witness it. But she was alone, with only her thoughts and the solemn crystals to hear her out. It was sad, heartbreaking in fact, but this was something Lightning had to do alone. She had refused even Serah's company on her trip.
Her fist curled tight around the roses stem, the thorns curving from the fresh-cut stem digging deep into her skin, drawing blood that leisurely dripped to the crystal floor. Lightning paid it no mind, steeling herself mentally.
"I'm sorry, Fang…" Lightning had never been able to face her feelings when it truly mattered, and it seemed this was no different. She fought for words. "I…I can't wait forever. It's already been three years, and I can't keep pining for someone if I know they might never come back."
And it was true. Lightning had wasted the last three years in her eyes. Some might argue that she had done fantastically, helping the new military get on track and teaching people how to live and get by on Pulse, Gran Pulse, she corrected herself mentally. Then again, Lightning wasn't most, and neither were her friends. From Hope to Sazh to Serah, heck, even Snow could see that there was something wrong with her.
Lightning tried to continue, but her throat closed up for a moment, choking her under the weight of her own emotions. Sorrowfully, she shifted her eyes away from Fang, moving them again to Vanille's still figure.
"It's time to move on, Fang." Lightning spoke carefully, even knowing Fang couldn't hear her. "I hope you understand. I love you, Fang, more than anything, more than I ever thought possible. You opened my eyes to so many things, to myself. And that's why I have to stop this—it's gone too far already. I can't wait any longer."
Lightning turned her head away for a moment, eyes locking on her booted feet. Her head swam with thoughts and emotions deeper than the deepest ocean. It tore her apart inside, but it was something that needed to be addressed. She couldn't waste her life, her youth, pining for someone she wasn't sure would ever come back. The last time Fang and Vanille had gone to sleep, it had been five hundred years before they were released again.
Nothing she told was a lie; she did love Fang, and the Pulsian had opened her eyes to so much of the hidden beauty in the world, to her own beauty, both inside and out. In turn, she had educated Fang of the world through her eyes, the eyes of someone raised away from it all, in a world where social concerns meant everything. They had so much to share in those weeks, to explore and be explored.
"Maybe one day you'll come back," Lightning voice was braver than she felt, strong and clear. She'd always been good at speeches. "One day. But until that day, Fang, I'm going to keep moving forward. If we're really meant to be together, then it will happen eventually. Until then," she whispered, chancing a glance at the smaller body. "This is where we say goodbye."
And just like that, Lightning could not take it anymore. She could not stand to be there. As salt made liquid trickled down her cheeks, Lightning wanted nothing more than to be away from there. The crystal pillar that held up Cocoon had always held meaning to her, some good, some bad, but she could no longer stand to look at it.
Biting her lip, Lightning placed the bloodied rose at Fang's feet, her smile bittersweet—she could barely see through the tears blurring her eyes. Slowly, Lightning straightened, laid one last kiss on Fang's frozen lips, and turned her back on the crystal prison. It was, in so many ways, like a funeral.
Lightning closed her eyes.
"Sweet dreams, Fang."
And she left, the only traces of her presence there the bloodied roses.
She left, taking no note of the crystal shining and resonating behind her, beginning to glow and pulse, a wave flowing through it, through the entirety of the pillar. Even in her dreams, fighting a Behemoth on the Steppe, Fang paused, her heart swelling with sorrow. Lightning. Everything was gone in an instant, replaced with images of the strawberry woman, whose attitude was sometimes like ice.
She wasn't strong enough to wake up, not yet, she knew this. But she would be. Eventually.
One day, she would wake up. Wake up and sweep Lightning off her feet.
Until then…
"I love you, Light," Fang whispered, without really knowing why. "I always will, don't forget that."
