He enters the room and is surprised not to see Gibbs sitting next to the bed holding vigil like he has been for the last couple of hours.
He stares at the man occupying the bed, the man whose file that is actually more like a book that he is currently holding. He sinks into the chair sighing as he notes the many tubes and monitors currently attached to his agent. He can barely comprehend the events of the long day that is now almost over.
Yesterday he hated this man.
He hated that he was ever hired by NCIS.
He hated that he never had any grounds to fire him.
He hated his attitude, his approach to doing his job.
The approach he considered to be useless to the kind of agency that he wanted to run.
Now he is being forced to re evaluate every notion he has had on Tony DiNozzo.
He's going to start with the file Gibbs keeps telling him to read.
There are glowing commendations from every police department he has worked in, piled on top of that are commendations for bravery and notes regarding times he went above and beyond to get a desired result. It is also littered with formal reprimands for insubordination, disregarding orders and reckless actions. The amount of reports on injuries received in the line of duty would take him all night to count up. He just had to add another one.
He gets to the agents childhood and feels the first pangs of sympathy when he sees his mother died when he was only 8, the pang intensifies when he reads the word suicide, and the fact that he was sent to boarding school less than a month later, following a 2 week hospital stay from falling down the stairs. He looks at the other reports ranging from the age of 8 to the time he was 12 and wonders why nobody ever wondered why the little boy only ever walked into doors when he was staying with his father. The man doesn't deserve the title.
God he hates this.
He doesn't want to feel sorry for DiNozzo. He doesn't want to care that his father was obviously a bastard. He wants to still believe the things he did yesterday.
That DiNozzo was an arrogant slacker.
That he was a selfish playboy that only cared for himself.
That he wasn't a good agent, or a good man.
He can't believe those things anymore, because he is lying in a hospital bed, unable to breathe for himself as a result of his heroic rescue of his family, and of him.
He thoughtlessly sacrificed himself for someone that shows him disdain on a regular basis.
He doesn't know what to do with that.
"Finally read that file Leon"
Gibbs voice manages to startle out him of his thoughts, he is glad for the distraction.
"He's not the overgrown frat boy I thought he was is he?"
"Nope"
"Then why the act?"
"Dammed if I know"
He moves towards the bed on stares at Tony's still form for a long moment.
"Kids got a lot of scars Leon, he likes to keep them covered"
He never thought of it that way, but his childhood was obviously damaging, he had to find his own unique way of dealing with that.
"His father..."
"Is lucky that we've never met"
He sees the anger burning in his eyes and is suddenly grateful DiNozzo senior is absent from Tony's life, otherwise he'd be putting his best agent in jail for murder.
"He gonna make it?"
"He'll make it, he doesn't have my permission not too"
He hopes that's true, he hopes he doesn't have to stand at DiNozzo's funeral, racked with guilt over the way he's treated him for the last several years.
All this time he has been blinded by a carefully constructed mask.
"I was wrong about him" so very wrong and there's no point in denying that now.
"Most people are"
He wonders why that doesn't matter to Tony, why does he allow people to believe he is nothing more than a shallow, materialistic idiot.
"What he did... well it was an eye opener to say the least"
"Shame it took something this extreme for you to get a clue"
"I should apologise when he wakes up"
He owes more than just an apology though, he's the reason he still has both his children. He will never be able to repay him, but he can try.
"I should go, call me if his condition changes"
"Night Leon"
He watches from the doorway as Gibbs settles himself into the chair he just vacated, he gently takes his hand and gives it as squeeze and begins to murmur softly to his friend.
Not his agent, not his colleague, his friend.
The relationship they have is deeper than just being co-workers and he is glad Tony has someone that cares for him now.
He turns away and heads for home. Home to his family. The family he wouldn't have if it wasn't for someone he hated yesterday.
...
It's a week before Tony is coherent enough to hold a conversation, short ones at that.
He pauses by the door and watches him lying there, pain etched into his features. He tries to ignore the harsh breathing as he walks towards the bed.
"Nice to see you with us Agent DiNozzo"
"Hey director, to what do I owe this ple..."
His words break off as he begins to cough harshly, he moves quickly and grabs the oxygen mask lying on the bed, placing it over the struggling agent's mouth.
It's several minutes before he manages to control his breathing and he wishes he could take away the suffering he sees in his eyes.
"Why'd you do it DiNozzo"
"Do what" His voice is painful to listen to.
"Don't play dumb DiNozzo, you know what"
"Just did my job"
"You did more than that. You didn't have to come back for me"
"I know"
"So why did you"
"If I'd left you there than two children would be growing up without a father, and I wasn't about to let that happen, not when I could do something about it. You might be an ass to me, but you're a good dad, I didn't want those kids to lose that."
He goes into another coughing fit, and he can only helplessly watch his agony.
He finally stops and closes his eyes in exhaustion. Time to say what really matters now.
"Thank you"
He smiles at him weakly, obviously too tired to talk and risk another coughing spell.
"And I'm sorry"
"Sorry for what?" He forces the words out in a raspy whisper, struggling to keep himself awake.
"I misjudged you"
With that he leaves and lets him get the rest he needs.
Things aren't magically fixed, he is no idiot, and he knows there will be times in the future where he'll be incredibly infuriated by the man. Just because he's acknowledged he was wrong won't make them friends. And DiNozzo will continue to pretend to be less than he is.
That doesn't matter, because now he knows.
He knows he's a good agent and an even better man.
He knows he's courageous and smart.
He knows how loyal he is, how he'll do anything he can to protect people. Even it means he'll end up gasping for air in a hospital bed.
Tony will carry on playing the fool and that's okay. But he won't be fooling him again.
His eyes are open now and they'll be staying that way