{Moving some old shit from Y! over to here for fun xD; This was a prompt for Opportunistic!Zombie which was fun to write, but holy god I'm sure it sucks xD; I'm positive I like...change tense from past to present during the sex which is just...WTF? I don't know, I'm sorry xD; I usually don't like writing MagicBoner!Zombie, but it was needed for this fic xD I hope you enjoy, despite how horribly written it is =w= Me and the person who prompted me came up with a list of drink names for Hanna to call Zombie and I'm proud that I managed to fit them all into the story UwU My favourite is "Fuzzy Navel" xDDD ALSO: Lira wrote the summary for me~If it's not already painfully obvious that it's not the completely random crap I usually use for summaries xD

Characters aren't mine, they belong to the wonderful Tessa Stone~}

Hanna's dining room couldn't really be called a dining room. It wasn't even a room; it was a small corner of the living room that happened to be beside the kitchen. In fact, besides the mismatched set of chairs and the wobbly black fold-up table, there wasn't much to indicate it was even for dining. But, this is where Hanna insisted they "have a drink or two together". Zombie pulled the whiskey out of the bag and twisted the cap open, hearing the seal click and break. Hanna produced two shot glasses and the two got started.

Not ten minutes later, Hanna was already smashed from only two drinks.

"I still don't think this is a good idea..." Zombie muttered, watching as Hanna knocked back yet another shot. Hanna slammed the glass back down onto the table with a huge grin and a slightly flushed face.

"Wha! No, c'mon Jack, you bought the stuff!" Hanna said, smiling and sliding a shot glass in "Jack"'s direction. He leaned forward and filled it up the the brim, sloshing the amber liquid out the side of the glass slightly.

"I thought it might make questioning the clerk a little easier. Jack? Are we back on classic fairy-tale names again" Zombie replied, picking the glass up and staring uninterestedly at the contents. Hanna laughed, refilling his own glass.

"N-Nah, that ended with Rumplestiltskin and no one being able to guess your name. Man, I thought for sure someone would catch on to that one...No, Jack like, what's-it-called...Jack Daniels!" Hanna said, laughing at his own joke. "Jack" merely nodded, showing Hanna that he got it. He held the glass up to his lips and tipped the contents into his mouth and down his throat. He could never tell Hanna no about anything, why start now?

"Tha's tha spirit!" Hanna called out, holding his glass out in a toast before dumping it back into his mouth.

Other then a slight warm sensation settling inside him, Zombie felt nothing from the alcohol. He assumed that once your brain became slightly more...dead, it became a little harder to inebriate it. The warmth faded and he was exactly the same as before he took the drink, no harm done. He vaguely wished he could say the same for Hanna.

Hanna was giggling to himself, his face flushed and his eyes half-lidded and lazy. He shot Zombie another glance, and fell into more laughter. Not being around people for almost a decade can sometimes make you forget social cues, and it took Zombie a moment to realize that Hanna was laughing at [i]him[/i].

"What?" Zombie asked. Hanna just giggled more, leaning forward onto the table and turning his neck, laying his head atop his arm.

"You just have...like...really nice lips." Hanna whispered, giggling a little more. His eyes zeroed in on Zombie's mouth and he just smiled wide. Zombie felt a tugging at the back of his mind and he felt like he should probably feel more awkward then he actually did.

"I'll bet, when you were alive, you had to beat women off with a stick, huh Jim?"

Jim Beam. The name flashed across Zombie's mind before he could stop it and he smiled, in spite of himself. He leaned forward and tugged the bottle from Hanna's hands. He refiled Hanna's glass, thinking a little on his question. Hanna's face lit up and he thanked him before tipping the contents down his throat.

"I don't really remember. What about you?" It only seemed naturally to ask Hanna the same question. Hanna seemed to think so to, since he didn't hesitate with his loud groan.

"Maaaan. I dunno. I'm like, a chick-repellent or something. Worth says it's because I'm creepy. Am I creepy, Hurricane?" Hanna gazed up at Zombie, his blue eyes going watery and a small pout settling over his features. Zombie's small smile widened and he shook his head.

"I don't find you creepy, Hanna." He replied. This seemed to satisfy Hanna enough to make the pout disappear, and his face settled back into it's usual wide-grin.

"Alright, awesome. I don't thin-find you creepy either, Screwdriver." Hanna muttered back, holding his glass back out. Zombie took the hint, and poured more of the drink into it, which Hanna quickly downed.

"Man, we could have chicks if we wanted. You could still get girls Martini, even now!" Hanna yelled, sweeping a hand out in Zombie's direction. Zombie just shrugged. Hanna's eyes squinted.

"Unless...you don't like girls? Were you gay?" Hanna asked, his face becoming a little more flushed. Zombie's eyes met his and again, Zombie shrugged.

"What's the difference?" He asked. Hanna's eyes widened and he was on his feet in a second, leaning over Zombie.

"What's tha-are you for real! There's like, a HUGE difference!" Hanna's voice boomed and he turned, throwing his hands up in the air. "You've got like, hard, angled dudes, or sweet, soft, round girls!" Hanna's hands made a cupping motion over his chest that Zombie chose to ignore. Hanna turned and pulled his chair closer to Zombie, plopping back down and holding his glass out again. Zombie automatically tipped the glass bottle over and refilled it. Hanna sucked the liquid down and held the glass out again. Zombie's eyes lowered to the glass and back up to Hanna's face.

"Another. C'mon, Fuzzy Navel!" Hanna barked, wiggling the glass a little. Zombie gave a disgruntled sigh and refilled it. Hanna downed the contents and his lips came forward, crashing into Zombie's in one fluid motion. Hanna's mouth pressed back hard against his and it took Zombie a moment to register Hanna's tongue poking gently at his lips. He opened his mouth, pulling it inside and rubbing over it with his own. He heard Hanna release a small sigh and felt hands come up to tangle into his hair. A little more tongue, another faint moan, and Hanna's lips disappeared. Hanna sat back, his face flushed and his lips slightly swollen.

"Th-There...See the difference? You kissed a boy." Hanna reminded him, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. Zombie's face was still frozen, his eyes wide and his mouth still slightly open. Whether it was shock or the fact that he had been dead for a decade, it took Zombie a moment to realize what had just happened. Hanna held his glass up again, and not-knowing-what-else-to-do, Zombie refilled it.

Hanna took the shot, slamming the empty glass back onto the table.

"Did you notice the difference?" Hanna asked again. Zombie's eyes rose to meet Hanna's baby-blues and he shook his head.

"I don't think I-" He started, only to be cut off by Hanna.

"Seriously! You can't tell the difference between that kiss and the kiss with a pretty girl!" Hanna yelled.

Zombie's mind flashed back to Hanna's lips twisted into his and their tongue's working. He felt a tugging in his stomach and an idea worked it's way into his brain. He quickly pushed the idea back out, there was no way he could do that to Hanna. Another wave rushed over Zombie, his mind going back to how warm and welcoming Hanna's lips felt. Of course he'd come to feel something for the bouncy redhead. It was only natural with the way Hanna treated him; so much like someone that was still very much alive. He already had an unusually overprotective hold on the boy, so it was expected when it blossomed into something a little bit [i]more[/i]. Still, taking advantage of Hanna, the way he was now, was something else entirely. And yet...

Zombie rose to meet Hanna's eyes and he felt another nagging at the back of his mind. Hanna just continued to give Zombie a lazy glare; his face still slightly pink. He held his glass out, making a fake coughing noise to bring Zombie back to this reality.

"C'mon, Pina Colada." Hanna shook his glass again. Zombie poured more of the drink into it, watching Hanna sip the contents down in one go.

Feeling another strong tug, Zombie finally opened his mouth.

"I don't think...we kissed long enough for me to tell the difference." He replied, his voice still cool and calm. He felt a pang of guilt, but it was too late to turn back now. He watched Hanna carefully, trying to judge his reaction. Hanna stared over at him, as if to ponder his statement. The two locked eyes again and Hanna's face flushed a little more. Zombie felt his nerves tense up. He half thought about retracting his last statement, or telling Hanna it was some kind of joke. Instead, his eyes widened as he watched Hanna lean slowly over.

Zombie knew that somewhere, in the back of his mind, he should've felt more guilty when Hanna tilted his head slightly to the side so Zombie could capture his lips easier. In all honesty though, he couldn't think of anything he wanted more then Hanna pulling on his tongue with said lips. Besides, what's the point of having the ultimate "straight face" if you never use it?

Hanna sighed breaths into Zombie's mouth when their lips broke apart. Zombie brought his hands up, cupping Hanna's face and pulling him closer, deepening their kiss. He felt two hands come up and grip his shirt, Hanna's legs coming together between his. His hands left Hanna's face and traveled down, feeling the thin frame under them shiver. Hanna's mouth opened wider as he pulled Zombie more into him, his breath catching and speeding up.

Zombie's hands finally lowered to Hanna's lap, and he felt Hanna tense. The redhead released another moan followed by their lips reconnecting and a deep breath exhaled out his nose; Zombie took that as a go-ahead. His hands dove at the zipper, pulling it down and letting himself inside Hanna's boxers.

Hanna moaned as Zombie's cool skin came in contact with his erection. Zombie's fingers rubbed hard at the base of Hanna's cock while his palm gently pushed up, adding sweet pressure just under the head. Hanna's hips arched, trying to push back. Zombie reached out with his other hand, pushing Hanna back down into the chair. He continued to tease, alternating between quick pulls and slow caresses; his hand gripping the head of Hanna's cock and rubbing his palm over it in small circles.

Hanna let out a small whine, and Zombie couldn't stop himself from chuckling. He leaned forward, licking up Hanna's neck slowly, coaxing more pitiful noises from the boy.

"C-Can you...tell the-a-aahh...d-difference...now, Sex-On-The-Beach?" Hanna whispered as Zombie's other hand came up to tease his nipples under his t-shirt.

"I think I prefer you to boys or girls." Zombie answered, ignoring the ridiculous name and grinding Hanna's nipple hard between his thumb and finger; excitement settling in his stomach as he felt the sensitive nub stiffen between his digits. Hanna moaned, his hands tightening onto the sides of the chair he was sitting in as he tried to push his chest out for more.

Hanna opened his mouth to argue that he was a boy, but was cut off by Zombie releasing his cock and trying to gently coax him up out of the chair. Hanna complied, standing up kind of wobbly; the alcohol still going to work in his system. Zombie's hands worked quick, tugging Hanna's pants the rest of the way down and pulling his oversized shirt up and over his head. Hanna's hands flew over his chest out of habit, trying to cover the large zig-zagged scar that covered his thin torso. Zombie reached out, taking Hanna's hands in each of his and holding them back. He leaned in, his tongue running slowly up the scar. He could feel Hanna shaking, his wrists struggling against Zombie's strong hands.

"D-Don-Nnnuh..." Hanna cooed, throwing his head back as Zombie continued to lick around the sensitive flesh. His tongue ran through the deep cut, tracing it. Hanna made a cross between a groan and a squeal and Zombie released his hands. Immediately, they came up to rest in Zombie's hair, Hanna tugging gently at the white tufts on the side. Hanna whined, pushing his hips out and doing his best to make Zombie realize his erection was still present; bobbing and dripping. Zombie heard more whines above him as he licked lower, biting into the soft flesh that is Hanna's hip.

"Puh-Please...M-My-" Hanna's face flushed and he's unable finish his sentence, settling instead, for pushing his erection closer to Zombie's body. He feels a laughing breath cover the spot Zombie was just biting into and Hanna fidgets.

"St-Stop laughing!" Hanna whined, tugging Zombie's hair a little harder and feeling his face fall into his signature pout. Zombie does his best to bite back a smile as he nods.

"Sorry." He replies, his hand wrapping back around Hanna's cock. Hanna's hips twitch forward and a hiss of relief escapes through his teeth. Zombie tugs harder this time, feeling his own erection straining painfully into his pants.

Hanna comes quickly, falling over Zombie's frame and twitching as he releases onto Zombie's hand, every nerve in his body spasming.

"Ah, aha, ahh..aaahh..." Hanna sighs out, his body convulsing as his hands pull at Zombies scalp harder. Zombie pulls his hand back, strings of come stretching from Hanna's cock to the spaces between Zombie's fingers.

Zombie stands up, his height easily exceeding Hanna's by a foot or two. Hanna falls into his chest, the mix of alcohol and ejaculation making him light-headed.

"Should we continue? Or would you like to lay down?" Zombie's voice is still even and Hanna feels his stomach surge at the thought of "continuing".

Hanna's breathing evens out and he pulls back, turning and laying the top of his body over the chair he was sitting in. Zombie's groin tugs almost painfully and he watches as Hanna looks over his shoulder at him, they're eyes catching each other. Hanna gives him a small smile, his teeth digging into his bottom lip as his hands grip the side of chair. Zombie releases an unnecessary breath and leans over, practically falling on top of the smaller body. He lowers his hand, still covered in Hanna's come, and sweeps a finger over Hanna's entrance. He feels the body under him tighten, and waits patiently for Hanna to relax. A moment later, the finger pushes it's way into Hanna, the tip wriggling it's way deeper inside.

"O-Ohhh God..." Hanna breathes out, his grip on the chair going white-knuckle tight. Zombie pushes the finger in deeper, his other hand resting on Hanna's hips and feeling his reactions. Zombie hitches his finger up, rubbing it slowly against the top, smiling when Hanna moans.

"Yesyesyes, th-there!" Hanna gasps, leaning down lower and trying to push back against Zombie's finger. Zombie's hand tightens on Hanna's hip and he pulls his finger out, pushing it back in a little harder. After a few moments, another finger is added and Hanna is rolled over onto his back. Zombie reaches out, pulling Hanna's glasses off and tossing them onto the fold-up table. For a brief moment, he considers putting Hanna on the table too, but decides it's probably too unsteady. Zombie pulls his fingers out, hearing Hanna groan.

Zombie undoes his pants, pulling his cock out and rubbing his hand over it, coating himself the best he can with his own pre. He pumps himself a few times, before positioning himself.

He doesn't say anything as he pushes into Hanna, the sweet friction rubbing over him. He leans his head back and closes his eyes, feeling the warmth wrap around him and urge him in deeper. He complies, jutting his hips out and hearing the redhead under him practically scream out.

"J-JAMESON!" Hanna cries, his hands coming up to circle around Zombie's neck as he pulls him in closer. Zombie reaches out, pulling Hanna's legs around him and pulls out, slamming back into the writhing body underneath him. He leans over further, pushing Hanna's legs up into the air as he pounds into the spot that causes Hanna to scream his "name" over and over.

"Jay-Oh fucking G-God..Ja-Jameson, y-yes! Fuck yes! There, right-Oh God, so fucking good and-A-Ah ahhh!" Hanna's cries dissolve into moans and words that Zombie is too far gone to make out. He pushes into Hanna more, feeling his pants slip past his hips and fall to the floor. He moves his legs further apart, bending and trying desperately to push himself more into Hanna's warmth. Hanna's hands come up to tangle into the sleeves of the familiar orange shirt as he clings, trying not to slip off the chair as Zombie rocks harder into him.

A few more desperate thrusts and Hanna is gone again, the little bit of come still left inside him shooting out and onto his stomach. Zombie groans, feeling Hanna tighten around him and he pulls out slowly, loving the way Hanna's walls rub every part of him. He cups his hand under himself as he comes, hot spurts making him sigh, his glowing eyes twisting shut. He catches most of it, but a few stray shots manage to land on Hanna's thighs.

Hanna (shakily)sits up, wrapping his arms around Zombie's waist and pulling him closer, nuzzling into his stomach and sighing.

"Jameson isn't an alcoholic drink, is it?" Zombie asks, his "clean" hand working it's way through Hanna's hair.

"It's an Irish Whiskey. You can make a pretty badass drink if you mix it with Mountain Dew: Code Red." Hanna mumbled, smiling. "It's called an Irish Redhead."

Zombie returned the smile, stooping to plant a sweet kiss on the top of Hanna's head.

"We'll have to try one of those next time." Zombie whispered, hearing Hanna laugh.