Not that long ago, Sonia thought she was getting somewhere with her twins. She had been close to them with they were young, but hormones and puberty had interfered when the girls turned into teenagers. They had developed hobbies, joined social circles, and cared more about discovering themselves than spending time with their mother. They three had drifted apart, and Sonia had let it happen, busy with work and her own personal adult matters. The teenage situations her daughters were experiencing didn't seem as relevant or important to her as Tegan and Sara's initial raising, upbringing, and survival.

When Tegan first moved out of Sonia's house and into Stephen's apartment, Sonia began realizing the errors of her ways. When Sara moved out as well, Sonia realized just how neglectful she'd truly been to her daughters over the last couple of years. From then on, she was bent on righting her wrongs, and she was sure she had been making progress towards understanding and reconnecting with her girls again. She was supporting their musical ambitions, driving them to gigs and refraining from telling them to paly quieter when they practiced in their rooms, she'd significantly lightened up on the girls' chores and responsibilities around the house now that they didn't spend most of their time there, and she'd even allowed them the liberty to live where they wanted, even if that place was their father's. She thought her twins were beginning to adjust to their new lives, and she thought her own place in the girls' worlds had been reestablished. Yet here was Tegan in her living room with another suitcase preparing to move all priorities in their lives again.

"Tegan, what's in the suitcase?"

A vein in Tegan's forearm bulged as she hoisted her suitcase further up her side into her armpit. She was gripping the handle with a firmness that told Sonia whatever decision she'd made this time was final. "I'm moving back home, Mom. I want to live with you again."

Joy surged in Sonia's chest, but it was a selfish pleasure, and she quickly surprised it. On the surface, the statement was a good one. Sonia liked having her girls at home, and she felt she could watch over them better than her contractor ex-husband could, but underneath the happiness she felt, the therapist in her knew Tegan didn't want to move back home because she missed rules or chores of the love of her mommy. Tegan's desire to move back home was no doubt more complicated than that, and some type of inner confusion was the reason for it all. Her oldest daughter was struggling to know exactly what it was she wanted from life, and Sonia couldn't be truly happy knowing her child obviously wasn't. So she approached Tegan with open apprehension instead of open arms.

"That's great, sweetie, but why does it look more like you're going to your father's?" If Tegan was moving back home, she needed only to stay here, Sonia thought. She was already in the house. She was already moved into her rom for the weekend. Why the suitcase?

"It's Sunday, Mom. If I'm going to live here during the weeks, it means I should be at Dad's on the weekends. Today's part of the weekend. I need the suitcase to pack up some stuff from Dad's so I can bring it back here tomorrow."

It was an explanation that made Sonia relax her shoulders and understand the meaning behind the leather case in Tegan's grip. But now that she knew Tegan was going to be home (and she wasn't going to contest Tegan's decision to move home), her maternal instinct wanted to hog her daughter and keep her away from her father. At least for the day. What was the point in Tegan going to Stephen's for just one night? "We can get your stuff tomorrow, sweetie," she compromised. "Why don't you just stay here tonight since you're already here?"

"No," Tegan said quickly. Sonia's daughter tightened her fist around the suitcase's handle even further, turning her knuckles a disturbing shade of snow white and reminding Sonia how adamant Tegan was in her assertion. The elder twin knew what she wanted, and no one was going to throw a wrench in her stubborn plans. "I have to go to Dad's today so I can tell him I'm moving back in with you. And if I stay here tonight I'll be here a whole week. I don't want to have to wait that long to see Dad again."

Of course Tegan's real reason for wanting to spend the night at her father's apartment was that she couldn't bear to spend another night here where Sara would be all day. While they had separate rooms, they were bound to run into each other at some point, and it would just be too awkward. They had already said goodbye. They'd made love for the last time, and Tegan was ready to force herself to move on. She couldn't do that if Sara was always so close to her, only a room away in the same house.

Sonia, of course, did not pick up on this fact, and her obliviousness allowed her to think Tegan simply didn't want to cut the close bond she'd formed with her father recently so soon. She could accept that fact, and she knew it would do no good to argue with Tegan. Tegan was going to her father's today, and that was as set in stone as Excalibur. "Okay, honey," Sonia agreed. "Do you need me to drive you there?"

Tegan nodded, and Sonia turned to grab her keys. She collected the wad of jingling metal quickly, knowing if they didn't set out soon a voice was going to start whispering in her ear that she should stall to keep her daughter in her company as long as she possibly could. At that point, it would be much harder to let Tegan go at all. It was better to get the trip over with, rip it off her schedule quickly like a band aid so that she couldn't avoid doing it.

If Sonia hadn't needed to grab her coat from the closet, she never would have seen her youngest daughter eavesdropping on their conversation from the mouth of the hallway. Seeing Sara there startled Sonia in a way that she didn't expect. The first time Tegan had suggested changing their permanent living arrangement, Sonia had been very aware of how Tegan's moving would affect Sara. How the sisters were supposed to operate without one another had been one of the first questions she'd asked, and this time she had asked no questions. She'd practically forgotten she had a second daughter. She was so concerned about Tegan's individual needs, that she'd forgotten Tegan wasn't quite an individual.

"Sara," Sonia called softly with a smile on her face, just to further remind herself that she had another daughter she loved and cared for just as much as her first. "Are you going to live with me too, dear?" The very first move had separated the twins for the first time in their lives, but the distance hadn't lasted long, and the two quickly returned to each other like the ends of a rubber band after being stretched thin. Now that the twins knew they didn't want to live apart, Sonia assumed they were travelling together and that a spot in the backseat of her car would be filled in a few minutes along with the passenger seat. But she was wrong.

"No, Mom, Sara's living with Dad and staying with you this weekend," Tegan answered for her sister, and this was Sonia's second surprise within the minute. Her younger daughter was almost always capable of answering for herself, and Tegan only stepped in her twin's shoes to play big sister or conspiracy instigator. Sonia had a bad feeling she knew which role she was playing this time. After all, Tegan's first decision to move out had been when she wasn't getting along with Sara.

"Is that true, Sara?" Sonia asked, just to confirm what Tegan had already stated for her.

Sara nodded meekly, eyes on the carpet for the entire duration of the short, small motion, and it spawned concern in Sonia's gut.

"Is something wrong?" she asked to no one in particular. "Are you two fighting again? Is that why you want to move? If so, we can find alternatives to help, and –"

"That's not why I'm moving, Mom," Tegan spoke up. "We're not fighting. We're fine. We just can't be around each other all the time anymore. In a couple years we'll be done with school and have to live separate lives, and we have to learn how to not be attached at the hip anymore. Right, Sare?"

Sara's answer was the same as before, and Sonia was tired of seeing the origin of Sara's hair at the top of her scalp as she bent her head downward to nod once more at the carpet. But Sonia didn't say anything, didn't force Sara to respond with words. She was sure Sara was simply hurting from their imminent separation as all twins do when the time comes, and only time would ease Sara through the transition. But Sonia had to say that she was proud of both her daughters for realizing their futures' needs for their independence. She was proud of Sara for accepting it, despite not wanting it, and allowing the distance to happen regardless, and she was especially proud of Tegan for speaking up about it so boldly. The eldest daughter's maturity was rearing its head, and Sonia was not disappointed. She was impressed. If this kept up and music didn't work out for the two, Tegan might follow Sonia's path to becoming a therapist with excellent success.

Sonia now had double the amount of reasons to hurry with Tegan's request to go to her father's. Not only was it not fun for Sonia to lose Tegan, it was traumatic to Sara as well. If she couldn't find it in herself to drop Tegan off with her ex-husband for the day because of her own selfish needs, she could no doubt force herself to do it for her youngest daughter who Sonia didn't want to be sad or tortured by the constant presence of her sister when her twin's decision to leave had already been made.

"I'll be back in a bit, Sara," Sonia assured before donning the coat she'd retrieved and snapping its buttons soundly across her chest.

"Alright, Mom." Sonia was relieved to hear her daughter's voice for the first time that morning, but she was even more joyed by the lifting of Sara's head. Her eyes were no longer on the ground but instead fixated on her sister's, and the two shared a poignant look as Sonia traversed across the room to the front door and her shoes. It was a final, wordless goodbye for them, but it wasn't enough for Sara.

Nothing was going to be enough for Sara unless the two of them were under the same roof in the same bed in a relationship with each other. And she'd already had that. They'd been happy together just days ago, and the fact that Sara had already experienced the perfect life made it that much harder to give up on that dream. She just couldn't. She couldn't give up as easily as Tegan had. She would find some way to fight for them and their relationship and she would get her girlfriend back if it was the last thing she did.

But right now Sara didn't have it in her to fight. Fighting would have been defenestrating Tegan's suitcase, telling their mom that they were fighting and that she didn't want Tegan to leave, and stopping Tegan at the front door before she got in the car. But Sara didn't do any of that. She stood in the hallway until the front door closed behind her mother and her sister and then she sulked upstairs, utterly heartbroken.

Flashbacks of the first time Tegan left her, before they were a couple or had even talked about what happened to them that first night they'd had sex, hit Sara as she bypassed her own room to enter her sister's. When Tegan had moved to their father's the first time, Sara had stayed at her mother's and moved from her own room into Tegan's. Every night she slept on Tegan's sheets, missing the smell and feel of her sister all around her, and Sara knew instantly that the same thing was going to happen this time. Every weekend that Sara was at her mother's, she would never step foot in her own room. She'd sleep on Tegan's bed, write her songs on Tegan's bean bag chair, and put on Tegan's clothes to pretend they were her own. It was all Sara was going to get of her sister from now on, and Sara wasn't going to let that opportunity slip away from her too.

She loved Tegan's room, no matter how dark and different it was from her own. It was so very Tegan with her posters on the walls and piles of dirty clothes on the floor. It was like being in a world that revolved solely around her sister. When Sara was here, only Tegan existed. Even Sara herself was just a backdrop.

When Sara climbed atop the bed, it didn't smell as much like her sister as it used to. The twins had only slept in this house one night this week, and Tegan had spent a majority of the weekend in Sara's room, fucking her and discussing their future. Sara's bed probably smelled more like Tegan's than Tegan's own bed, but still Sara stayed in her sister's room, and she buried her face against Tegan's pillow. She thought about how prominent Tegan's scent would be against the sheet and the pillow case a week from now when Sara was visiting her mom for the weekend again and Tegan had been sleeping there for five days straight.

But just the thought of Tegan's fragrance and the light hint of it still on the mattress gave Sara hope. She knew she was going to fight, even if she hadn't today. All the inspiration she needed to make Tegan hers again was right on this bed where both of them had slept and both of them would continue sleeping, no matter how separated they were. She would fight for them. She just needed a little rest first.