"Isn't it a lovely thought?"

"Wouldn't you love to see more?"

I opened my eyes as I barely heard the whimper of a calm voice speaking out to me. All I could see in front of me was a figure of a girl. Her back was facing me and her light brown hair was shimmering in the wind. She wore a light baby green dress that had fallen to her lower thigh, and had her shimmering long hair was tide loosely by a light green bow into a ponytail. She had white flats on and light porcelain skin. She was standing in a field filled with grass and odd flowers. The wind was light and mild and I felt it pound softly on my face, ruffling my hair. I looked around me noticing I was on a field. I tried to look beyond the field, but that was all there was, just more of the field. The sky was light blue, and there were twinkling yellow lights only around us. The whole scenery, including the lights, was far too bright for me to handle. I noticed my green ushanka was gone and I was wearing a buttoned up T-shirt in the same color as the girl's dress. My pants were pure white and I only had baby light green socks on. I was lying on the field, dismayed. Where was I? One minute I was under a cold wave of waters drowning my senses, the next I was here.

"You're probably wondering what you're doing in this field." The girl said calmly, not turning back, with a soft milky voice. That voice was somehow calming my worries and filled me with nostalgia. "This is another world unlike your own." She continued.

"What?" I just asked, still dismayed.

"This is another dimension separated from the one you've come to know."

I stood up, confused, yet intrigued at what she had to say.

"In this world there is no sorrow, there is neither night nor evening. It is filled with light, wonders, and choice. Your destiny is engraved in this field."

I just looked at her like she belonged in a mental institution. "Are you mentally stable?" I asked bluntly.

She just giggled lightly and said, "If you wish to leave, there is always that choice. Choices are lingering in this world, YOUR world."

"I'm sorry lady, but you're starting to freak me out a bit."

She turns to me with a light, calm face; she has a warm smile spread on her lips. "Reach your hands up and gently capture one of the lights."

I reluctantly obeyed her and caught one of the orb lights that trailed around us. I closed it in my hands and felt the warmth embrace my palms. I just gasped lightly as I felt this curious, calming feeling in my hands.

"It seems as though you have picked your closest friend."

I stare at her curiously? "Stan?"

"He is your future in that orb."

"Who are you? And why did you mention something about a lovely thought or if I'd like to see more of it, when I woke up? And what does this have to do with me or Stan Marsh?"

"I am the Angel of Destiny, here to show you the futures that await you within each ray of light. You, Kyle Broflofski, son of Sheila and Gerald Broflofski, untied blood brother of Ike Broflofski. Residence in South Park, Colorado. Red and curly hair, bright green eyes, light skin, background religion Jewish, sex is male, sex preference is homosexual, birthday May 26, age 17, occupation is a junior in high school. Am I not mistaken that you are this person?"

I stood there frozen and amazed. How did this person, claiming to be the Angel of Destiny, know all this about me? My family, my name, age, grade, and even my sexual preference! I had never told anyone that I was gay (besides my parents, who were too embarrassed to tell anything to anyone)!

"If you are wondering how I know all that about you, then the answer is simply in my name, Angel of Destiny. I am here to help you make the right choice within your future, predestined by you." She closed her eyes and smiled lightly, "Isn't it a lovely thought to have to live each choice you are given before finally choosing. To experience each way as anew and clean slate. It is like rebirth, but in this occasion you remain the same person with past experiences but hold different futures." She then looks to the orb of light I have cradled in my hands. "That ray of light you are holding is one of the many predestined futures that you may choose from. This future in particular leads you to grow and envelop your relationship with your closest friend into a lover."

"Oh, you mean like a role-play game where you have different outcomes…. AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN STAN IS MY LOVER!"

"Precisely, and he is only your lover in THIS specific future. That is a choice that envelops your future in destiny."

"What is the choice that affects my outcome?" I ask interested.

"The choice of your true love. You have many options that lay within South Park, Colorado that affects each ending of your future."

"So Stan is just one of those options, and there are many others that I could end up with that will greatly affect my overall future."

"Correct. Some paths are delightful, others are grim. Only you can choose."
"So what happens when I choose?"

"You will be able to live out that future without memory of this or any of the other paths."
I stood silent for a long time before finally speaking. "How does this whole process go?"
"Once you decide to see one path, you shall awaken in your bed, unable to recall this and refer it only as a vague dream. Once you are done experiencing a path, you will return here with full knowledge once again."

"What if I want to try another path, do I forget everything again."

"Correct."

"Why are you doing this?" I asked, having this question lingering in my mind for quiet a while.

"Only for the reason that you have lost hope."

I flinch at the word hope. It must be true that she's an angel. How else did she know I have given up? I never told anyone that I attempted to commit suicide.

"You tried to disappear from this world by running away to San Francisco, only to jump of the Golden Bridge. You died, and came here. I am here, sent by God, to give you a second chance." She turned to me with a concerned and disappointed look on her face. "Or you could choose to stay here and continue your afterlife in this field, until you are transferred into heaven."

"B-but I committed suicide, don't I end up in Hell like everyone says?"

"What happens is not what everyone says. You will come to find many religions, including your own, have been right yet wrong in certain beliefs."

"I see."

"So what is your choice, will you venture this journey that has been given to you as a second chance, or will you remain here?"

"Do you do this to everyone that committed suicide?"

"No, only to those who have died, in any way, before their time has come."

I stood and thought a while. If I stay, I am guaranteed in heaven. I died on purpose, not caring where I ended up. So heaven shouldn't affect my decision much. Should I go back and try this little path choosing game? Why should I go back? I was just a burden to everyone anyways. How in the world, could I end up with anyone? I'm surprised I have the possibility to end up with Stan, and possibly more people. Could this mean that I have a chance at happiness? Could this mean that there are people that are willing to love me? My friends, they never seem to care for me lately. My parents, they have told me on numerous occasions that I am nothing to them, ever since I told them I was gay. I am a burden to my best friend Stan, who had a big fight with me and had told me that he never wanted to see my face again. I am a burden to my parents for being this way. I am a burden to all my other friends, who only see me as a weak Jewish nerd, and casted me aside. I'm pathetic. What right do I have to a second chance?

I felt tears well up, blurring my vision, streaming down my cheeks. I choked back some sobs and struggled to speak. "I-I thought you said t-that there were no *sniff* sorrows in t-this place." She simply stared at me in a compassionate and a pity filled expression, "As long as you choose to stay here, there will not be any. Though in this form, you experience the same emotions as always."
"S-so if I stay here, I will never feel sorrow and this agonizing pain ever again! But if I choose to continue this little game, t-then I'll keep crying?"

"Correct, but sometimes sorrow is worth the happiness you receive out of free will and a long life of no regrets. You have no idea what you are turning down if you choose to stay here. What you have been given the second chance to live, your free will, is what all the angels in heaven envy."

"Who will love me? My parents are ashamed, my friends hate me. Jesus Christ, even my little brother looks down upon me!" I continued to cry in a pathetic way.

"All these woes that you have mistaken for a reason to end your life, is not the way it will stay for long." She opened her arms to embrace me, while I still cradled the orb of light. "You are worthy of light, my child. This soul of yours is not ready to depart from these memories. Your friends, and your family, they only are in distraught. You will see, later on, that you are not alone."

I cried on her shoulder for a few minutes, till I finally nodded my head. "O-ok. I-I'll give living another try." I joked with a weak smile, tears still streaming down my cheeks.

She held my face in her warm, calm hands very gently. Is this how an angel was? Warm and calm, and comforting? "You are to be forgiven, child." She wiped my tears away with her thumbs and then gently took my hands, which still cradled the orb, and cupped hers around mine. "Will this be your first path to view?" she calmly asked. I simply nodded and she slowly and gently opened my hands. "Close your eyes and gently cradle the light close to your heart." She commanded softly.

I did as I was told and I felt complete warmth and love in my heart. Then I woke up.

I stared at the ceiling, realizing I was in my bed and it was a school day, because the alarm rang off. I sat on my bed and rubbed my eyes. That was the strangest dream ever. Then again, I couldn't remember the dream itself, only that it was strange and oddly calming. I smacked the OFF button on my alarm clock and stepped out of bed. For some reason, I felt light-hearted and excited, like something good was going to happen. Despite all the angst and depression I was carrying for the last month, I felt like a new person this morning.

Still… I can't help but want to remember what that dream was.