Chapter 11 – What's Going on Here?

Kyle and Tweek turned around and gaped at me. "It's your birthday?" They both seemed totally gobstopped.

"Er, uh, no. It's a week from today, but yeah, it's coming up."

"Oh." Craig looked indifferent about his little mistake. "Well, if that's the case, let's go Tweek." Craig turned around and started to walk away.

"Ah! C-Craig, you asshole, wait up!" Tweek gripped onto the railing for dear life as he walked uneasily down icy stairs. Kyle and I watched as he trotted awkwardly after Craig, who'd decided to wait at the end of my sidewalk.

"Idiot, like I'd actually leave you behind."

"Nngh..." Tweek frowned at Craig ever so slightly. I heard him mutter 'jerk' before turning around to wave goodbye to us. I couldn't help but chuckle when Craig flipped me off from behind Tweek's back before bopping him on the head, clearly not appreciating being called an asshole and a jerk. Though Tweek had every right in my opinion.

Kyle's eyes turned to me but his head remained facing forward. "So...it's your birthday...next week."

"Yeah, I guess so."

We stood awkwardly in the doorway. I was fidgeting about and looking for something to say as my heart palpitated in my chest.

"Wanna follow them?" Kyle turned his head, finally, and looked up at me with a mischievous smirk.

That sounded like an incredible amount of fun, and I couldn't help but grin like a crazy idiot. "Hell yeah."

o()o()o

"Although," Kyle whispered, "this is technically stalking, isn't it?"

"It's not stalking as long as they don't know we're here."

"No, I really don't think that's how it works. Dude, we're watching them from inside of a bush." We had chosen a patch of those pine-needle bush things, or whatever they're called, to hide in as we watched them sit on the swing set at the park.

"It was your idea."

"...Shut up. Irrelevant details. Besides, you went along with it." Kyle pulled a face that clearly said 'give up, I win'. So all I could really do was give a resigned sigh and go back to watching Craig and Tweek. There was no arguing with this kid. I was watching the two very closely, but they still had yet to do anything interesting. It looked like they were just talking, but I couldn't hear what they were saying from here. I would have wanted to get closer, but there was no place to hide. Plus we'd be spotted if we tried to switch our hiding places now.

"This is really boring." I muttered.

"Yeah, it kinda is. But we can't go anywhere. Not until they turn away at least." Suddenly Tweek let out a loud, seemingly panicked cry. He jumped out of the swing and onto his boots with their thin, wobbly heels. He tipped instantly, and was on his ass in seconds. I almost got up from my hiding spot to go help him, but managed to keep my prince-in-shining-armor persona under control. I wasn't about to turn us in just cause Tweek took a tumble. Besides, the instant Tweek had started to teeter, Craig was up on his feet. He'd clearly meant to keep Tweek from falling, but hadn't gotten there in time. He did, however help Tweek up off the snowy ground. He had his hands on Tweek's upper arms, looking him over. I assumed he was asking him whether or not he was ok. I guess I was right because shortly after Tweek nodded a couple times.

Kyle tapped my shoulder, "What do you think of that?" He asked.

"I dunno..." I answered honestly, "Something good I hope."

Craig had apparently decided he'd had enough of the cold and turned to leave, though keeping his eyes trained on Tweek. Tweek smiled, seeming to quite like the idea, and the two of them turned away from us and headed out towards Craig's.

We waited a minute or so after they'd disappeared before we stood up from out hiding spots. I could feel my knees pop as I stood, and my muscles were all nicely cramped up. My left leg had fallen asleep and the pins and needles I was feeling made me hobble for a bit till it wore off. We walked in silence for a long time. We both silently agreed that we didn't want to stalk them anymore, especially after being stuck in snow-covered bushes for...it had to have been at least half an hour, though I wasn't entirely sure.

However, now that we were evaluating the scene in front of us like a couple of crime investigators, we had kinda run out of things to say. Well, I had plenty of things that I could say, but it would only lead to an awkward half-conversation followed by an even more awkward silence. So, I decided to keep my mouth shut and just stare straight ahead. Suddenly, the smell of something delicious wafted past my nose. I stopped and sniffed, but it was gone almost instantly. However, during that brief—oh god there it is again.

Kyle left out a gentle moan, "Mmm, that smells so good." He had his eyes shut and a goofy, crooked smile was beginning to spread across his face. "Where's that coming from?"

"Oh, it's this place called "Coffee Haus" spelled H-A-U-S. It's about a block back that way." I pointed behind me. "Wanna go? I think we owe it to ourselves after crouching in the snow for forever."

He opened his eyes and looked at me, the dark green pools smiling at me. "Hell yeah I wanna go. That sounds friggen amazing."

We about-faced and headed back toward Coffee Haus, excited to warm our bodies in the heated building, and to warm our insides with something delicious.

o()o()o

I sat down, not feeling satisfied I had finally gotten my drink, but embarrassed because Kyle had had to pay. I looked like some cheap-ass guy who had "accidentally" left their wallet behind just so I could avoid paying for the lovely "lady" I was accompanying. The barista had given me a disapproving look, while Kyle had actually looked happy to pay. Perhaps he was just happy to finally be able to be a man, in the sense that he was paying for me instead of vice versa.

We got comfy at our table and had taken the lids off of our drinks, watching as the steam rise as we blew on the surface. "So," I began awkwardly, "what kind of stuff do you guys do in Chicago?"

Kyle looked up at me and furrowed his brow. "Hm," he thought for a moment, "I dunno, just whatever we feel like. Go out to eat, hang out at the beach despite the fact that it's kinda dirty and the water doesn't get warm till, like, late July. You know, almost every week during the summer there is some obscure or semi-famous artist that'll perform at Millennium Park. It's pretty cool. Well, that's for days we actually wanna go out and do shit." He took a sip of his pumpkin spice latte thing. Apparently it was still too hot, as he pulled a face and flicked his tongue in and out of his mouth. A weird habit we have when we've scalded our tongues; or maybe that's just us. Who knows? "Usually we'll just go over to each others' houses and hang out. I actually, technically, live in one of the suburbs that's like right up against the Chicago border, but I just say Chicago cause people know about it. I mean, who's heard of "Oak Park" anyhow? Anyways, I just hop on the train and I'm in the center of Chicago in like 20 minutes."

I nodded and offered a weak 'uh-huh.' I was just going to let him ramble, cause I didn't really have anything to say. My mind was drawing a blank.

"But uh...yeah..." He sniffled his nose. Rubbing it with the back of his hand a moment before sniffing again. "Gross, I think I'm coming down with another cold..."

"It was probably from being out in the cold for so long."

"Yeah, probably. In Chicago, we're lucky if we get snow in December. I can't remember ever having it in October."

"Wow...I can't imagine not having snow around for more than the 3 months of summer we get."

"Haha, our climate is so weird. It gets cold late, and then winter ends late, and we've got, like, next to no spring. Kind of a shame, though with my allergies, I really don't mind."

"Ahh that sucks. I have asthma, and I tend to have more trouble with it during the fall." I took a sip of my hot chocolate. I could feel the heat through the plastic lid of my cup before it reached my tongue and I quickly put it back down before it could burn my tongue. I'd let it sit a little while longer. I stared at my cup a moment before chuckling. "We're like a couple of old men."

"Oh? How so?" He braved another sip of his drink. Still too hot, apparently.

"Well, we're sitting here, drinking...actually, it'd be more appropriate if it were coffee, but we're sitting at one of those two person tables, talking about the weather and our health." I chuckled a bit, "maybe we should brought our chess board."

Kyle stared at me for a moment, as if he was waiting for his mind to register what I said. Then he started laughing, almost spilling his drink onto those pale hands of his. "Oh god," he said through his chuckles, "the mental picture, hahaha, that's hilarious!" My laughter soon escalated to match his. I didn't care that we were drawing attention, or that people were staring at the girl with the deeper, manlier laugh than had been expected out of her.

Kyle was the first one to stop laughing. "Come on," he said, standing up, "let's head back to your place." He outstretched his hand and smiled down at me: the perfect gentleman in women's clothing.

I couldn't help the blush on my cheeks as I reached for his hand. "Kay..." We picked up our still very hot drinks and headed out, walking hand in hand.

o()o()o

We had finished our drinks on the walk home. Unfortunately, they had gone cold by the time we were only about half done, so it kinda defeated the point of getting the hot drinks if they were just gonna get cold. Regardless, we made it home in one piece. Mom was watching TV on the couch next to Dad, who was complaining about having to watch the girly show that mom liked.

"Hey, Mom! We're home! Be up in my room. Call us when dinner's ready. Thanks!" We were already up the stairs by the time I finished greeting my mom in the quickest and most brusque way possible. That way, it didn't invite unwanted questioning. I made my way around the spare beds that had been placed for my esteemed guests before flopping down on my own and throwing my arm across my eyes. I didn't know what had taken it out of me, but for some reason I was suddenly dead tired. Thinking back, I realized that I hadn't eaten, and then I'd carried Tweek home, and then I'd gone out on that super sleuth mission. It was already well into the afternoon. Guess I did know what took it out of me...

I felt Kyle sit down next to me. "You alright dude?"

"Yeah, I'm just really tired." I didn't want to mention how hungry I was at the moment. I figured I'd get lectured if I told him I hadn't eaten that day. I could feel Kyle shifting. Something brushed against my sides. I slowly removed my arm from my eyes. Kyle had a hand placed on either side of my waist, leaning over me, looking me straight in the eye. His curls hung down towards my face, and his eyes were filled with a weird mix of concern, confusion, and annoyance. "W-What?"

He leaned in even closer, till we weren't more than a couple inches away from each other. I could feel my heart begin to pound in my chest so hard I was afraid I was having a heart attack. Breathing became so difficult I had to stop doing it for a moment. Heat shot up to my face and I could feel the slightest tingle of excitement in my groin. Curse these goddamn hormones. He leaned closer still till our foreheads were touching. His lips parted a moment and his eyes closed, as if concentrating heavily on something. I was wondering if I should take the plunge and lean in to kiss him. Was he inviting me to kiss him? Should I take the initiative? But before I could decide, he pulled away. He turned away from me and brought a hand up to his face. I wondered what kind of expression he was making. I kind of wished I could see his face at that moment, to know what he was thinking, what he was feeling. Or to at least see his ears so I could register a blush. I just wanted to see something.

"Well," he began shakily. I waited with baited breath. "It looks like you don't have a fever." He turned to look at me, apparently he had had enough time to compose himself while I was still a flustered mess. "That's a relief."

Numbness began to coat the disappointment that sat on my chest like a 20-pound weight. I had no idea what had just happened or how I should react, so all I could do was stare and mutter weakly. "Yeah...what a relief..."

Author's Note

GRAGH! WHY am I on a south park writers' block ; ^ ;

But somehow I was able to break it for my friend's birthday, which is today :D

Please don't assume by reading this chapter that I'm from Chicago. It's pretty easy to do research, you know :)

-PD