Rose's scream echoed through my head, as the vampire's fangs ripped through my neck. It played over and over again, as she disappeared from my sight, when the strigoi forced my blood down my throat. It kept replaying, like a song on repeat.
She had come to me, loved me. She was precious, like a flower. A perfect prayer, in a desperate hour. She was everything beautiful, and different.
I held her to me, not letting her go. I crushed her; us. I was stupid to keep her; she should have been able to leave. She loved me, and I stole every dream she had. When I ran out, I should have been able to stop the strigoi from getting me, but I couldn't. I flinched when I saw Alan get his neck snapped. And that killed me.
I knew she would come after me, come to save me from what I am. She shouldn't, but we both knew that it was her right, and only hers.
I took her life from her, not fighting the blond strigoi. She didn't realize that she could have had anyone else she wanted, Adrian had wanted her; he loved her with a passion that could rival mine, but she chose to stay with someone that was a target in the vampire world. Sure, all moroi are targets, but they knew who I was; knew I had killed a number of strigoi, and at such a young age in the dhampir race.
I should have told her no; I shouldn't have held my heart out to hers, so that they could entangle themselves like our bodies were that night in the cabin.
I knew, seeing me falter like that, would hurt her more than anything. I hated being right, when I saw that in her eyes. I ruined her, all but killed her.
The strigoi that changed me, was dead. I killed him, after he tore me away from my life, a life me and Rose had already planed out. I despised the race I was now part of. I prayed for her, hoping that if she didn't come back to kill me, that she would be healing, that they would help her.
My eyes held no tears, being unable to cry. But my throat burnt from pain, hurt from being separated. I pushed her on to me, even though she believed I was pushing her away. I pushed her around, and it had nothing to do with being her mentor. And I broke her down into pieces, that might never be put back together. But if she came for me, once that stake pierced my heart, someone would be able to stand her back up, and help her one step at a time. I just hoped she knew how much I loved her, how much I cared. I didn't save her, I knew she would never forgive me. But maybe she would, and she would feel sorrow for the heart that broke her into pieces. All I knew was that I was sorry.
Now all I had to do was wait for her to come to me, and save me from this unwanted life.
A/N: yes, it's very short, but sad. It was inspired by the song Stupid Boy, by Keith Urban. But people who listen to country probably already guessed that. Just my thought on what Dimitri felt when he heard her scream.