Preface

Ennis Del Mar rolled over; he was still half asleep and stared confusedly at the warm shirt-clad back he now had his face up against. He opened his eyes slightly more and grunted: Oh he remembered who this was now.

The warm shirted body shifted a little before rolling all the way around to come nose-to-nose with Ennis.

"Good morning, cowboy," Jack Twist said quietly in his hoarse morning voice, before smiling amusedly at the frowning, half sleeping, curly haired man.

Ennis took one look at this cheerful man and rolled back over to where he was before. This was still a mighty confusing situation to get himself into and not something to be dealt with so early in the morning. He wondered if maybe Jack would let him sleep if he stayed still enough.

Jack's face fell and he rolled his eyes: Ennis made no sense to him. So quiet, so puzzled, always brooding; he wasn't entirely sure where all this was going and if he meant anything to Ennis at all. It certainly hadn't seemed like that last night. Jack smiled. But he's been thinkin' again, Jack thought to himself glumly. Always can tell when he's thinking 'cus he concentrate so hard; can see him ticking. He smiled slightly, but he's thinkin' again. Saw it as he woke-up. Ticking, always ticking...

Ennis relaxed somewhat; Jack seemed to have given up. This, this... hmm? What was this? Hm. This strange stuff could wait until later; but so could the sheep. He needed just a little more sleep. All this strange stuff's takin' up to much sleep time.

But as much as he tried to deny it, he knew he had enjoyed everything so far – more than he felt he should. It baffled him. He hadn't felt this wholly content for a long, long time. But he wasn't going to let Jack find that out; not yet anyway.

Jack Twist decided it was high time Ennis showed him a little bit of affection other than late at night. Although he don't seem the emotional type, Jack thought grudgingly, it just rips out of him, like fire. He don't understand when it does. Same when he talks. He's edgy, like a scared little animal; mighty surprised when either comes out of him.

He scooted closer to Ennis and wrapped one arm lightly round his waist. Ennis was not entirely sure of what to make of it. Slightly unnerved, he let it be, deciding it best not to do anything at all.

Jack took this as a good sign, hugging tighter and lower down on Ennis's waist, snuggling close to his tense shoulders.

Like the frightened little animal Jack thought he was, Ennis bolted, jumping around to face that stupid Twist to give him a piece of his own mind and to tell him to let him sleep–

But as soon as met those huge startled blue like the sky or something eyes, unusually worried and unsmiling face, his anger melted away and he sighed closing his own hazel pair, feeling a drop of guilt trickle into the pit of his stomach, shivering softly as their noses brushed.

Jack smiled broadly and sighed; relieved that Ennis hadn't lashed out like it seemed he wanted to. Cautious to keep him this way, Jack stayed very still and didn't try anything on him; instead he closed his eyes and appreciated what had just happened.

Ennis opened his eyes slowly and felt the bead of guilt grow into a little pool. He saw Jack lying so unnaturally still and calm but with his special thankful smile Ennis often saw him wearing late at night, after some of their... strange stuff. Ennis sighed to himself and the pool enlarged. It weren't that strange he did enjoy it after all. It's just wrong. Not strange – wrong.

Ennis looked up and longed to see Jacks sky blue eyes again. No, he thought, not sky, not water, not ice, not denim – they're some special blue... he paused. Jack blue. No other colour like it... Jack blue eyes. He tried to picture them in his head but couldn't get it right; he had to see them again. Ennis wasn't exactly sure how to get Jack's attention; he defiantly didn't want to speak, he hadn't the faintest idea what to say.

Suddenly coming on all bashful, Ennis reached one trembling hand – if only slightly – towards Jack's hard jaw line, cupping his face for a second before pulling away.

Jack's eyes were wide with shock and happiness and both men smiled, Ennis no longer shy. He was far too busy looking at Jack's Jack blue eyes and the happy little crinkles on the outside of each eye. Now they're something.

"Ennis, I..." but Jack was lost for words. Instead he opened and closed his mouth making small noises. What do I wanna say? He asked himself. I love you? No, Ennis wouldn't take that well...

That don't happen much, Ennis thought, smiling broadly. "Your mamma ever tell you, you look like a goldfish when you do that?" He said, laughing a little, his deep voice rough from lack of use.

Jack stopped gulping and laughed too, their noses touching once more. They stopped and both looked straight into each other's eyes. Reaching over to Ennis, Jack laced their fingers together. For once Ennis didn't seem to mind one bit. Their eyes closed in contentment.

It was still very early and neither man was in any mind to move.

"Sheep can wait." Ennis mumbled.

"mmhm..." Jack replied, almost asleep.

Outside the night deepened as it does before daybreak. Dark before dawn. A tiny slither of the great scarlet sun peered over the top of an ashen blue peak, spilling its ruby light down the mountain like blood.

Brokeback watched in silence.

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R x