Norrington's Wig

Disclaimer: I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl or anything related to it.

Captain Jack Sparrow of the ship, The Black Pearl, was quietly walking the streets of Port Royal. He was in town for Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann's wedding. They didn't know that he was in town because he wanted to surprise them. So he was wandering around town, killing time until the wedding. It was actually safe for him to walk around town for once because he was not a wanted man—at least for the day.

Jack walked along, humming his favorite song, when he stopped suddenly. He blinked several times and rubbed his eyes, to make sure that what he was seeing was real. He still wasn't sure so he smacked himself hard across the face.

"Not sure I deserved that," he said out of habit.

His face still stinging, Jack looked back in the window and he was creeped out by what he saw.

It was the blasted Commodore Norrington and he was talking to a—WIG! His white wig was sitting on a fake head that Norrington had drawn a face on and he was facing the wig and having an actual conversation with it!

"So how are you today?" he asked the wig.

"Just fine!" muttered the 'wig'. It was actually Norrington using a strange, almost girly voice.

"Are you exciting about the wedding?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because you should be marrying Elizabeth, not the blacksmith."

"But I do not love Elizabeth, as much as I hate to admit it. I never really cared for her. The pirates could have killed her and I would not have really cared."

"Why is that?"

"Because," said Norrington with a sigh. "I love you!"

"Aww! That's so sweet!"

Norrington kissed his wig and Jack turned away from the window and barfed. That was disgusting! Norrington loved his wig! Yuck!

Jack peeked back in the window and noticed that Norrington had left the room—and his wig. Now was Jack's chance. With an evil grin, Jack slipped a spray can out from under his amazing hat and snuck into Norrington's house. He went straight to the offensive wig and turned the spray can on it. Within a few seconds, the once white wig was completely pink.

Jack slipped out of the house and tossed the incriminating spray can into a nearby gutter. Norrington was in for a big surprise when he went to get his wig. Jack began humming again and started to walk away.

"SPARROW!" he heard someone scream from behind him.

He stopped and spun around. "That's Captain Jack Sparrow."

"I know you did this!" yelled Norrington, holding up his wig.

"Why would I do something like that?"

"Because it is entirely the type of stunt I would expect from you. You're dead meat!"

Norrington started to chase Jack who took off through the streets of Port Royal. Norrington was completely crazy and Jack could hear his maniacal laughter from several yards behind him.

Jack raced towards Will and Elizabeth's wedding, which he knew had already started. Just as Norrington was about to catch him, he found a rope and swung right into the middle of the wedding. He hopped off right between Will and Elizabeth as the priest said, "You may now kiss the bride."

Will and Elizabeth's eyes were both closed and they leaned in and they both kissed Jack. When their eyes opened, they screamed and yelled, "Jack!"

"What did I do?" he asked. "I promised I'd come to the wedding! 'Cause I really love weddings! Drinks all around!"

Will looked disgusted because he'd kissed Jack and Elizabeth was annoyed at Jack for crashing her wedding. And Norrington was closing in, still laughing and screaming at Jack for coloring his wig.

"Jack, why's Norrington yelling at you?" Will asked the pirate.

"Um, well, that's a long story."

"He's saying something about a wig…"

"Got to go!" cried Jack and he raced away through the crowd, and headed towards his ship.

"Anamaria! Help!" he cried as he neared The Black Pearl.

Anamaria prepared the ship to leave and as soon as Jack was on board, she removed the gangplank and the ship set sail a few minutes later, leaving Will, Elizabeth, and Norrington behind in Port Royal.

"What'd you do this time?" Anamaria asked, her hands on her hips.

"It's a long story."

Anamaria sighed. Knowing Jack, he had managed to get into some major trouble. And it was going to take him forever to tell the story.

Author's Notes:

This is my first attempt at a PotC ff and this is for my best friend Kate Hook who loved the idea of Jack spray painting Norrington's Wig and crashing Will and Elizabeth's wedding. Enjoy: )