So here's the deal - as soon as I finish with my current story 'Apologies' I will be moving on to a new project. One of the reasons I've been updating so slowly is because I've been working on a bunch of other stories at the same time. Each is just the start of what could be a larger work. I've allowed myself to write around 5k words for each. I'll be releasing them over the course of few weeks as soon as my other story is complete. (I decided to release one early ;))

Once the beginnings to all the stories are posted I will call for a vote and the winning story will be become my new writing project.

All story previews will be rated Teen. Once an AU has been chosen I will re-post and upgrade it to the intended rating.

INDEX

She Haunts Me

In the present, Judy Wilde is dead and Nick is intent on ending his own life.

Twenty years later Nick Wilde, much beloved member of the Hopps household, is in a position to take the reins from the soon to retire Stu Hopps. Many see this as the right choice while other are strongly opposed.

This story is told in two time periods as Nick attempts to find the will to live, and as his older self seeks to protect his family from threats internal and external.

Also, everything might have gone smoothly if Nick wasn't allowing himself to be haunted by his dead wife; a condition that could be cured if he wasn't secretly off his meds.

Rating: Teen

Genre: Drama/ Tragedy/ Modern Western?

This story might contain:

Crushing sadness - Multiple attempts at suicide - More females in love with Nick then a bad harem anime - Nick being a cowboy and taking care of business - Arson! - Gaius Baltar style multitasking - Eternal punching bag Nicholas Wilde.

The Lion Throne

Wildeholme, the great fortress and ancestral home of house Wilde has fallen and the rebel leader Robin Wilde is soon to be executed.

His teenaged son Nicholas has been sent to live with House Hopps. As a hostage/ ward, Nick is treated with contempt by all except a few members of the household. As the time passes Nick is forced to ask himself if he is still a Wilde or has he been won over by the gentle life of rabbits. With the known world falling into ever greater turmoil, where will Nicholas stand, what will his destiny be?

Rating: Mature

Genre: Grim Medieval Fantasy (Zootopia meets Game of Thrones)

This story might contain:

Massive game of thrones rip off - Nick is kind of (sort of) Theon - All the OC's - Major character deaths! - Disney's 'red wedding' - Lords and ladies - minor Lion King references - World's greatest swordsman Nicholas Wilde - The Rabbit Knight

Looking Glass

Judy has been having terrible dreams. Somehow the horrors she sees at night are finding their way into the real world. Power is awakening within her as ancient evil hunts from just beyond the vale of reality. Desperate for any means of escape Judy must fight for her life and her sanity. Along the way she may find herself becoming something she never imagined.

Genre: Horror (Zootopia in the 'Dark Tower' universe)

Rating: Mature

This story may contain:

The actual Dark Tower - Walter O' Dimm, Viscera, gore, and other gross stuff including bugs and claustrophobia - Judy trying not to lose her marbles - Rapey moments - Weirdness! - Gunslinger Judy Hopps - Ka, do ya kennit?

Savage Wilde Hopps

After a drunken tryst with Nicholas Wilde, Judy Hopps reacts badly, breaking the poor foxes heart. Some time later Nick meets Jack Savage and is confronted by an attraction he didn't expect.

As Nick finds himself in the beginnings of a relationship with Jack, Judy gets jealous and finally realizes she is an idiot (and also the worst).

Now she must try and win Nick back..

The time has come for two badass bunnies to go to war!

Genre: Comedy/ Romance/ Smut

Rating: Explicit

This story may contain:

Judy and Jack teaming up to save the mammal they love - Bunny cat-fight - Hardcore Porn! - Butt stuff - Fox Burger... as in, two hot buns sandwiching a thick piece of fox meat… that is to say, a threesome - pining and fluff - Jack or Judy? Who will win!?

The Wild Children

While traveling to Bunnyburrows Nick Wilde and Judy Hopps are attacked and injected with nighthowler serum. The two race into the woods as mindless savages and are lost to the civilized world for over a year.

Decades later the Wildes are the most controversial, enigmatic and unprecedentedly wealthy mammals in all Animalia. They are the mother and father of a new race of animals. Forty-three children all of whom are the scientifically impossible hybrids of a rabbit and a fox. These children are a new kind of brilliant. They are impossibly fast and strong but also strange, and to some, deeply frightening.

The wildes have a secret that they are going to unveil to the world. One that will define the future and reveal the catalyst for the evolution of all modern mammals.

Genre: Sci-Fi

Rating: Teen

This story may contain:

The Kwisatz Haderach - A dash of 'Ender's Game' mixed with a pinch of 'Dune', sprinkled by a violent sneeze of 'Stranger In a Strange Land' - Actual science (well, not really) - Told mainly from the perspective of Bogo and Bonnie (cool right!?) - Nick and Judy's creepy unnatural super-spawn.

SHE HAUNTS ME

The seemingly endless torrent of grief that had filled every corner of Nick Wilde's being for the last hour was finally beginning to wane. In its stead was left a void; numbness. He was drained beyond all measure, his emotions had been burned out leaving only cold certainty.

They had covered her body with a tarp some minutes ago.

The night was warm and filled with the sounds of crickets and buzzing insects as well as short bursts of radio chatter coming from the many handhelds resting on the hips of over a dozen officers and first responders.

Before the tarp, Judy had lain lifeless on the ground, her eyes had been closed at some point. Her mouth hung open slightly. Already flies were gathering around the pool of blood that had at first collected around her body before inching across the pavement in a thick stream, to be eventually pulled by gravity down a nearby storm drain.

Before the other officers had arrived Nick had held her in his arms, with no way to staunch the blood rushing from multiple gunshot wounds. She had whispered his name and then fallen still; his wife, his Judy. Her heart had slowed and become so quiet that it stopped without his notice; like the dying notes of a symphony.

Before he held her and wept, or perhaps he had screamed (before that) he had ended the firefight by killing three mammals.

He went against his training and aimed for the head each time, and each time he had been rewarded with vengeance. Although, in the end, his revenge counted for less than nothing. She was dead, and if his plan was successful, he would be too, and before the night was out.

Bogo was an issue.

He had been watching him like a hawk since he arrived personally on the scene.

Nick was wrapped in a gray blanket. He had wedged himself against the red-brick side of a building across from his dead wife.

People who he may or may not have known had tried several times to coax him away into a squad car but Nick had refused. They had at times stopped and spoken quiet condolences to him, none of which he could even recall. He was currently playing at being catatonic although in truth he was waiting for his moment.

Again Bogo was the problem. He had seen the look in Nick's eyes. For a second when he'd still been holding Judy in his arms their gazes had met, and in that brief time, they both knew. Nick was going to try and end his life. Bogo had seen it on the faces of his officers before. Nick knew that Bogo knew, and Bogo knew Nick knew that he knew. It had been a complicated exchange but nonetheless, unmistakable.

Minutes later it was time for Judy's body to be taken to the morgue at Zootopia Memorial. The chief had quietly arranged for the view to be blocked from both a growing crowd of onlookers as well as Nick himself.

The cape buffalo for the first time that night approached him and knelt down so they were face to face. Nick could see a great mask of sadness and tension etched across his features. The chief would remain stoic while on duty, as he had for every officer he had ever lost.

"It's time for us to leave. You're coming with me to the station and we are going to go over everything."

Nick spoke for the first time that night, his voice was so raw it was barely comprehensible, "I would rather not."

"Nick," Bogo used his name for the first time in memory; his voice gentle but unrelenting, "let's be honest. These next few days are going to be a living hell. You will have to answer endless questions and make hundreds of decisions that you shouldn't have to make. You are going to have to defend her actions and yours as well. After all that is finished, you can fall apart. But until then, we have a duty - to her, and the people who loved her. We have to do right by them."

Nick listened without even the slightest reaction. The words didn't make him feel anything, probably because he couldn't seem to 'feel' at all; but they did ring true.

Still, he felt he had to try and escape this (fate literally worse to him than his own death), "I'll come with you. I just need a few minutes to be alone."

"No." was all Bogo said at first, "Of the many choices you soon have to make, this isn't one of them. You are coming with me now and at no point am I leaving you alone. Not until I am satisfied that you are getting adequate support. So do as I say, it's time to get up. Come with me to the cruiser."

Nick was screwed.

There was no getting away from this. Not without some kind of distraction or act of God.

It was a good thing then that for Nicholas Wilde, luck seemed to come in peaks and pitfalls.

One of the officers who was working on the opposite side of the street had been canvassing the crime scene, and on a whim, had opened a wide plastic bin. These were generally used as storage for sand that workers would shovel out to protect sidewalks from getting too slick from the ever-falling rain provided by the districts sprinklers.

When he opened this one however, he found a teenaged deer huddled inside, "Get back!" The thin mammal yelled as soon as his hiding place was revealed. He stood in a panic brandishing a small knife. His eyes going round as he saw the horde of police officers standing only feet away.

This deer was the fourth and final member of the thieves him and Judy had encountered while on patrol.

The street became pandemonium in an instant. Multiple officers unholstered their weapons.

Bogo was charging towards the conflict and yelling in a booming voice for everyone to hold their fire.

The youth dropped the knife he was holding and almost instantly was hauled from the box and planted face down on the ground.

It was less than thirty seconds between the moment that Bogo left Nick alone by the cruiser and when he had the presence of mind to look back. In that time Nick had slipped away. The instant he was out of view found him sprinting down several dark alleys. He knew Zootopia and how to get lost in it. Only minutes later he was already long gone.

Nick had always been a planner. It's what made him a good hustler and a good cop. He never went into a situation half-cocked.

Almost nine months before her death, there had been another incident where Judy's life was nearly ended. This was not long before her and Nick were to be married; only a few months into their engagement.

It had been in one of Zootopia's many public parks. A mentally disturbed rhinoceros had grabbed Judy around the waist as she tried to calm him. The huge mammal had proceeded to throw her with all his might like a football. She had sailed high and far over the open grass; tumbling through the air.

When she struck the ground Nick had felt for an instant like he was going insane.

She hit the earth, and rolled, finally coming to rest in a crumpled heap.

It was then that Nick realized, not in a theoretical or abstract way, but as an utter gut certainty, that he could not – would not - go on living without Judy Hopps.

Judy, being some kind of super rabbit, was miraculously unharmed and returned to work two days later.

By that time though, the full force of his epiphany had sunk in. For the most part, Nick had refused to think about the possibility of Judy dying. It was far too painful to consider, even in theory. But he now knew that should she die he would truly have lost the will to live. She really had hustled him.

This was a serious glaring weakness that he could never escape.

Her dream was to be a cop. He could never, and would never, ask her to give up her dream. But the more he thought about it, the more certain he became that eventually, (regardless of how hard he tried to protect her) Judy's luck might one day run out. When it did, he decided, he would need a plan. Because he was not going to suffer the fallout of her loss; not for one second longer than he absolutely had to.

Nick Wilde awoke in total darkness, twenty meters below the earth in a small room which contained nothing but a bed, a dresser, a small desk and a single framed picture.

He showered quickly, dressing in a brown collared shirt and a black pair of well-worn jeans.

It was around three in the morning and as had been the case for nearly twenty years, Nick was the first person awake within the Hopps burrow.

At almost fifty-five years of age, Nicholas was in excellent shape. His knees and back had remained strong regardless of the constant and unending strain he put on them.

He was thin and wiry, yet in no way did he appear weak. Every ounce of him that was not lean muscle was wiry sinew.

His hands had become strong and sure. Endless hours in the sun had bleached the fur on his neck and arms until they were almost strawberry blond. His expression was mild; he almost never smiled but neither did he frown. When he spoke it was measured and directly to the point. On the rarest of occasions, if he chose to make a speech or tell a tale, you listened.

Finally, his eyes were as green as they had ever been. But now they had seemed to have withdrawn further into his skull, making them intense to look on. They glittered brightly in any light, almost luminous; and they could pin you to the wall if directed in anger.

He was handsome; more so even than he had been in his youth. His good looks though were tempered by an aura of menace which, unless you were among his family and friends, told you immediately that this mammal was not to be taken lightly.

Walking through the well-furnished tunnels Nick guided himself by memory. Eventually, he came into a semi-lit room which led him to the large space that was the main cafeteria.

His claws clicked and echoed over the vinyl flooring as he made his way to the empty stainless steel counters of the industrial kitchen.

A digital clock mounted on the wall blinked 3:10 in large glowing red numbers.

Nick began his daily task of setting out brown bags and filling them with lunches. There would be one hundred and thirty-six bags when he was done.

Twenty-three of these had special dietary requirements while countless others had less pressing preferences attached to their future owner's needs.

He scribbled a name on each bag and organized them by grade and bus as he arranged them over the countertop.

The Hopps household had the most rabbits from a single burrow within the public school system. This was not just within the Tri-Burrows but as far as he knew, anywhere in Animalia.

Back when Judy was young it had only been her, alongside three of her siblings attending high school. Today there were over sixty Hopps high schoolers enrolled at West Burrows High.

That meant his family made up over seventy percent of the rabbit population within the school (a fact that Nick had to admit gave him a great deal of smug satisfaction).

He considered it his life's work. Showing his nieces and nephews that they could be anything. Helping them with homework, encouraging their intelligence, forcing them to attend school by any means necessary including bribes, threats, gifts, guilt trips and occasional blackmail.

For years he had struggled in his quest with little or no help from the adult rabbits who he shared a home with. In fact, he was often met with outright hostility. It hadn't been until the last decade or so that things had been shifting in his favor.

It was almost at the point now where he could get a few hours sleep at night. For years he practically lived at the school.

He spent so much time with the teaching staff he had attended half a dozen weddings. He was easily the most despised member of the PTA which was in Nick's mind the greatest single achievement of his life.

This was mainly due to the past fifteen years of his constant unending push towards sex education. He had eventually taken over the role himself of sex-ed teacher and had been doing it now for years.

He literally kept condoms on his person at all times and handed them out freely to any who asked. Yet another thing that made him unpopular with certain members of his family and neighbors.

By the time Nick was finished with the lunches it was nearly 5:30, almost time to make his first rounds and collect members of bus one. He had just enough time for a coffee.

A few minutes later a small chime started to sound from his watch as he took his first dose of precious caffeine.

He needed to take his pills.

Nick dug them out from his back pocket. Two reds, a blue, an orange, and finally the big white one. Antidepressants and antipsychotics as well as a little of this and that to keep everything stable.

Nick took everything but the antipsychotic which he held in his fingers and slowly tapped against the metal countertop as he thought.

It had only been a few months since Bonnie had finally given him a bit of leash by allowing him to take his own medication without her direct supervision. The old bunny was hard to fool and Nick had spent almost two years now without skipping any of his pills.

It had been nearly a month since he had been granted the freedom to self medicate; long enough in his mind that he could safely start cheating again.

Lately, he had felt a desperate need to see her. The feeling was becoming a bit of an obsession. He just needed her, if only for a day or two. Real or not it didn't matter. He just had to see her face and this time he wasn't going to slip up. He wouldn't go as far as before.

Bonnie had a team of her little spies who reported about the perceived state of his mental health.

The last time they caught him he had simply gone too long without all his meds. If he had just exercised a little more self control he would never have been caught. Opposed to what most in the burrow believed, Nick had actually spent most of the last two decades unmedicated. He was an expert at hiding his condition.

So, carefully and quietly Nick took the pill in his fingers and used a metal drain stopper to crush it into powder at the bottom of the sink. A few seconds of running water later and it was gone.

Nick returned to his coffee which he drank in a few large gulps before pouring himself a second cup. He was going to need to be on the ball if he intended to make it through the day.

When it comes to suicide a mammal has a whole world of options. Unfortunately for Nick, there were both a number of ways that he didn't want to die and one major requirement that needed to be met: no one could ever find his body.

Now, there are many ways for mammals to disappear forever - making it happen with next to no resources, with little or no notice, and without help; that was difficult. Not to mention many of the options were horrifying to say the least. For instance: jump into a heat vent on the Sahara Square divide. Nearly impossible to get there, and even if you could, the system would shut down before you would be totally incinerated. Ok, how about throw oneself into one of the big vats at a bug farm. First off, it would be tough to get in undiscovered. Second, even if you were dead before you hit the bugs the idea of being devoured by a swarm of tiny maggots... not nice. And don't even think about the possibility that whatever means you used to off yourself fails. In the bug scenario there exists a tiny but still present possibility that one could find themselves, still conscious, submerged in a sea of biting insects. For Nick this immediately put the idea into the 'Nope' category.

So in the end what had Nick planned for his quick trip into the unknown? Well, he took a cue from the most effective mammal disappearer in Zootopia; Mr. Big.

Nick had six drop points around the city. Conveniently Judy had been killed only two miles away from the nearest one. "What luck!" Nick thought to himself bitterly.

He arrived at heritage park a little over ten minutes after he had started sprinting. It was easily the fastest he had ever run; a personal best.

The day is simply filling up with silver linings.

The first thing Nick did upon arrival was to retch his guts out onto the dew covered grass.

After that little bit of business was complete he stumbled, gasping, over to a group of hedges at a far corner of the field.

Digging around with his claws it took him less than a minute to find the cinder block he had buried in the soft earth. It took five minutes more to dig it out enough to haul the whole thing onto the grass.

Inside one of the square hollows within the concrete block was a small box that had been triple bagged and circled with a redundant amount of duct tape.

Once nick had ripped this open he found what he wanted. A thin wire with loops on the ends. A set of tranquilizer darts. A small dollar store combo lock and a super-light camping bag. In addition to these items were other things he might have needed in other scenarios: a wad of cash, fur dye, a fake passport, to name a few.

In the second square hole of the cinder block was another bag. Inside this Nick found a pair of gym shorts and a cold, earth moistened t-shirt. He quickly pulled off his uniform and donned both items of clothing.

Next, he loaded the small stuff into his pockets and struggled with the cinder block which he managed to load into the camping bag.

When Nick had picked which parks to bury his insurance policies he had looked for ones that were right next to mass transit; preferably trains.

Literally across the road from Heritage Park was a station, the train would be arriving in minutes. So Nick humped the huge brick across the road and up the steps to the deserted platform.

For some mammals, a cinder block wouldn't be considered all that heavy. For a fox, it was like lifting a goddamn washing machine.

Nick got two minutes to calm his heaving breaths before the train pulled in. He dragged the bag aboard and positioned it in the seat closest to the doors.

Only a few tired mammals were traveling at this late hour and none seemed interested in Nick or what he was doing.

Two stops later Nick got off the Zootopia loop at Glacier Falls and transferred to the Tundratown loop.

Once he was situated again he watched the animated map located above the door. Seven stops until he had to get off. Thirty-five minutes to Floe Lane and maybe thirty minutes more before Nick would meet his end.

It was two stops later that a middle-aged pair, a Koala, and a Beaver stepped onto the train and sat across from Nick

Up until this point Nick had been occupying his mind with as much irrelevant information as he could manage. How many seats were in each car. What were the names for each of the station stops.

He had been memorizing them desperately before being interrupted. Now he found himself analyzing these new arrivals as he would a couple of marks.

They sat next to one another, matching scarves. Both were tired; barely aware. The female koala leaned against the beaver for a moment. They were together, both had rings, married. They had-

Suddenly Nick was hit by a wave of grief. He didn't know where it came from but he was powerless to stop it. Pain and memory washed over him. All he could manage to do was stand and face the door as if looking out into the night. Tears ran in streams down his cheeks as he grit his teeth in an attempt to silence his hitching sobs. His whole body shook.

He wanted nothing so much as to simply lay on the ground, curl into himself and pull his fur out in chunks.

But he was close. It would be over soon. He could fight the pain for one more hour, even though at that moment an hour felt like an eternity.

Nick jumped as he felt a hand on his arm. He turned slowly trying to clear the wetness from his muzzle, but it was a losing battle.

"Sir, are you alright. Can I call someone for you?"

Nick just shook his head. Looking down at his hands which he noticed for the first time that night. Apart from the mud on his fingers, all up his arms he was utterly covered in his wife's blood. His neck was a matted horror, it was everywhere.

Idiot! The most important hustle of your life and you're screwing it up.

"N- no. Hah, it-it's fine s-sorry to worry you. Just g-got back from a pretty ugly scene. A little stressed. I'll be o-ok in a second."

What did I just say?

The beaver had left his seat as well and he was watching Nick intently. "I've seen you before on T.V." The beaver pointed at Nick, "Wilde" right? You married that partner of yours. The bunny who caught Bellweather. What's her name again?"

Saying it was like pulling a fish hook out of his throat, "Judy"

"That's right, Judy Hopps, or I guess it's Wilde now huh."

Nick couldn't bring himself to respond. He tried but felt that if he opened his mouth he would start to scream and wouldn't be able to stop.

Before either of the mammals could say anything more the screens located above the doors all over the train turned bright yellow and the coach was filled with a few short tones. Moments later scrolling text began to float upwards accompanied by a robotic voice.

CITIZENS ALERT

EVENT: CITIZEN IN DISTRESS

ISSUED BY ZOOTOPIA POLICE DEPARTMENT PRECINCT 1

RED FOX: NICHOLAS P. WILDE, MALE, AGE 30-40, THIN BUILD, LAST SEEN NEAR CLOUD ALLEY AT 0130 AM WEARING A POLICE UNIFORM, MATTED FUR.

DUE TO THE TRAGIC LOSS OF A FAMILY MEMBER NICHOLAS IS CURRENTLY IN A STATE OF EXTREME DURESS. THE ZPD IS SEARCHING FOR HIM AND IS ASKING THAT IF SPOTTED, TO IMMEDIATELY CALL 911.

NICHOLAS IS NOT A DANGER TO OTHERS BUT IS IN NEED OF IMMEDIATE HELP.

Nick turned back towards the glass train doors and attempted to compose himself. He was going to have to make a break for it. That meant abandoning the cinder block which was going to screw things up a bit. Although lugging the thing around had likely been a mistake from the start. He simply wasn't thinking clearly enough. He would have to make due. Although if he was going to have to run for the docks in a t-shirt and shorts through Tundratown he might very well freeze to death on the way.

The koala broke his revery in a kind voice, "Nicholas why don't… why don't you sit down with me and if there is anything you want to talk about. Anything at all, I'd be more than willing to just listen. You can't go outside in what you're wearing so let's just ride the train. Me and Bert haven't got anywhere to be."

Bert the beaver? What cruel, cruel parents.

Nick wished that he could tell Judy, she would have been amused. He could hear the tintinnabulation of her laughter echo through his mind. So inscribed upon his soul the sound, that the auditory hallucination caused him to startle and turn towards the couple.

Nick then noticed that Bert had wandered a short ways down the coach and was making a very conspicuous, 'incognito' phone call.

"Now arriving at Frosty Station" an automated voice announced over the sound system. The train was slowing down and the doors would be opening in less than a minute.

Nick had regained the feeling of numbness he was submerged in previous to his breakdown. He decided it was safe to try and distract the koala until he could make a break for it.

"She's dead, my wife Judy. She was shot. There was nothing anyone could do."

Silence.

Eventually, the koala responded with a quiet, "Oh." And then, "Your wife… she was a hero to a lot of people… this whole city is going t-to mourn her loss. You… I can't imagine how you must feel… you might not see it now but there are mammals everywhere that are going to be there for you; who care about you. You aren't alone."

"I know," Nick even managed a small smile. "It was Judy who finally convinced me... to let people in... to love this city. I have friends and family, hell I even have admirers. I know that they will be there for me. Unfortunately, it's not enough. It never will be, because deep down I'm selfish. I've spent my whole life avoiding pain and I'm not about to change now."

The doors at Nick's back slid open as the train came to a stop. Without hesitation he bolted backward onto the platform and dashed down the cold, salt strewn steps that led to street level. Behind him, he could hear his name being called but he tuned it out.

Right now he had to focus. It was several miles to the waterfront and he was going to have to really move it if he planned to get there without being caught or succumbing to exposure.

Nick swept from room to room gathering the fourteen kits that he needed to drop off at school early for a variety of activities. Six needed to get to band, four for pyramid practice, one for early detention and one for a student council meeting.

Half of the kids he went looking for were already getting dressed or had since made their way to the front door.

The habitually late Orin Wilde was already back to sleep, fully clothed and wearing his backpack when Nick got to him.

As was the case most mornings Nick lowered his face down to Orins ear, "Up, up." and as was also the case Orin reached around his father's neck and let himself be lifted off the bed; Nick holding him against his chest.

"You are getting way too old for this you know that right?"

"Nmmm…"

At the door Nick counted off the kits as they walked out and boarded the small bus. "Noah, Wyle, Ella, Dory, Mike, Gan, Morty, Leahn, Deirdre, Methuselah, Tina, Alex, Bruce and," Nick extracted Orin from around his neck, "Orin. Good luck at practice today Flips. Remember, get your knee up when you slide."

The other kits had already boarded the bus. From the driver's seat, Abby Hopps waved enthusiastically in their direction.

Orin turned back after taking a step out the door, "Dad can I stay home with you. Those guys are going to bully me again. You don't understand-"

"Orin I do understand. Remember what we talked about. You try and deal, and if that doesn't work get help from a teacher. Everyone knows exactly what is happening and if those kids try and pull anything, they are in for some serious trouble; Aw mean it. Now, do yah trust me?"

"Yeah."

Nick grabbed his son's long ears and lifted them up from where they had been drooping over his back.

"Do yah love me?

Orin giggled, "Yeah."

"Well, I love you too." Nick kissed his head. "Have a good day. Try not to bite anyone."

Orin grin widened as he snapped his harmless buck teeth together, "How can I resist, my dad is a fox after all. Rawr! Chomp chomp! Bite bite bite!" Orin playfully mimicked the actions to go with his gnashing as he jogged towards the bus.

Nick had to suppress a grin of his own as the bus pulled out of the burrow parking lot and meandered down the road leaving a dusty cloud in its wake. "Hah, savage bunny."

"You turned out to be a pretty good Dad you know; did the right thing when you adopted him."

And just like that she was back.

Standing just a few feet away, and looking no older than the day he met her, was Judy Hopps.

Nick swallowed convulsively and used every ounce of his will power not to stare at her, scream her name or burst into tears. Instead he looked around casually making sure that no one was watching or listening, before walking slowly out into the parking lot with his arms crossed.

"I've missed you so much." Nick whispered it, trying not to move his mouth in case someone caught a glimpse of him talking to himself. That was part of what had got him the last time.

Judy had circled around in front of him and placed her hands on his crossed arms bringing him to a stop.

He could feel her. He could smell her.

"God her eyes... she is so beautiful." Just looking into them was like a balm to his very soul.

Unfortunately, Judy didn't look terribly happy, "You are off your meds again. Damn it Nick! I want you to go inside, get the pill that you were supposed to take and swallow it. What happened last time can't happen again. I am not really here. I am dead. Stop doing this to yourself and let me go for Christ sa-"

Nick threw caution to the wind and reached down taking her face in his hands. He leaned in and kissed her in a way he had envisioned every hour of every day for the last two years.

When he finally pulled back she was looking at him with softer eyes, "Dumb fox."

"I'm your dumb fox. I'll always be your fox."

"I'm gone Nick. Please, I want so… so much more for you then this."

"You are not gone. You are right here, and you are real, you've always been real. I'm not going to let the same things happen as last time. Believe me, I've got this Carrots."

Judy's face had become deeply sad, and cold, "I'm not going to let you hurt yourself again. You may not see it but this family, hell, this whole town relies on you. It's not going to be like it was. I... Nick, I'm going to do what I have to do to make sure you mess this up; that you get caught. I'm going to do it because I love you."

"Judy, all I need is one touch, one taste of your scent, one look into your eyes. Just once a day and I can manage. I know what I did wrong last time, and like I said, it won't happen again… Judy?

She was gone.

Nick took a moment to still his heart beat and calm his mind. He let out a long sigh.

The sun was getting ready to appear over the hills far afield from where he stood. Taking a deep breath of the cool morning air, Nick turned and let himself back into the burrow.

Within minutes of leaving the train platform the cold air was already cutting right through Nick's fur. He guessed it was at least twenty below if not colder. It would only get worse, the wind would be blowing steadily off the water by the time he got to the docks.

What began then, was a battle of will.

Pain filled his lungs as cold air was billowed through them. Nick was forced to place his shirt over his mouth and started breathing through it as he ran just to cut some of the freezing air.

His feet had already lost all feeling.

Crystals of frozen perspiration began collecting at the corners of his eyes and mouth.

Nick traversed past empty intersections and through frozen deserted streets always looking for the easiest course as he avoided deep snow or patches of ice.

Everything began to feel numb; his hands, his lips, his ears, his nose.

His gate was becoming sloppy as he continued to push forward, heading ever downward towards the water.

He felt light headed; needing a break, to rest and catch his breath. But he didn't dare. To stop now was to fail. He would never get started again if he let himself cool.

Finally he arrived.

Before him was a wide concrete dock, as wide as a street and nearly a half mile long. It branched far out into the water. When cruise ships followed the canal and entered the Zootopia basin they would use this dock as a stopping point. This was a place where the water was deep enough that even the most massive of ships could pull right up and dock. Travelers could walk right off the boat and head into Low Town, a land of expensive cafes, and upscale shopping.

He had arrived, and as frozen as he was, he still had his facilities intact for the most part.

Gasping for breath Nick searched for an object to replace his cinderblock.

He realized now that he would never have been able to get the thing down here regardless, but hindsight being twenty-twenty, he would have to improvise.

After less than a minute of hunting around in a trash-filled alley off the main road, Nick discovered what he was looking for. An old, blackened log-rack that had at one point adorned the inside of a fireplace.

Nick found it too unwieldy to carry, but with some effort, he managed to drag it across the pavement.

Too bad it made such an ungodly loud scraping, bouncing, banging racket.

Gotta be quick Nick, before we wake the entire neighborhood.

He was halfway down the dock when he spotted a tall bulky figure jogging towards him from back near the road.

Suddenly seeing his plan in danger he redoubled his efforts and pulled the metal grate with one hand as he all but sprinted towards the end of the dock.

The noise he made on his way there was deafening and could probably be heard halfway across the lake.

The figure was getting close by the time Nick arrived at the end of the pier.

Out here, he could see the city rising up before him; spiral buildings and a million tiny lights. The dock was illuminated by dim, intermittent, lamp-posts. Below him freezing water slapped endlessly against the concrete supports.

Nick scurried around as he positioned the metal rack onto its side. His plan was to wear it like a backpack.

Shaking, he sat and wrapped the wire around his torso as well as the cold metal, securing it to himself. Next, he locked the whole thing together tightly with the combo lock. Finally, he began sliding his way, butt-first and back-facing towards the edge.

"Hey Nick right?" A fairly small and trim example of a polar bear was standing about ten feet away.

"S-sorry lady, wr-wr-wrong fox. S-so if you'll e-excuse me I have some p-pressing business to att-t-tend to-"

"I'm curious; why here? I saw on the news that your wife was shot over in the rainforest district."

Nick had nothing to say so instead prepared to heave himself off the last foot of the dock. With a push he came within a few inches of tipping over.

"Because I'm thinking that you probably could have found an easier way to off yourself. So why come all the way here to do it. Names Beatrix by the way. Nice to meet you."

Nick sighed or more accurately he shivered convulsively, "W-w-well Beatrix how about I tell you i-if you promise to t-turn around and pretend you n-never saw me."

"Hmm, alright. I admit I don't really care if you drown yourself or whatever but like I said, I'm curious."

"Crabs."

"What?"

"C-crabs, that's w-why I'm here." Nick made an attempt to momentarily still his shaking, "Freshwater crabs i-infest these waters and because Low Town is a tourist location no one i-is allowed to fish. A-also this the deepest harbour in Zootopia. I'll pass out b-before I reach the bottom. The crabs will eat me up and leave nothing behind."

The polar bear shifted her hips and laughed. In a strange way it kind of reminded him of judy, "So you don't want there to be anything left of you, is that it? Why bother?"

"Just d-don't want my mom and my friends having to identify me on s-some table or have to stand around me in a stuffy room while I l-lie in an ugly wooden casket."

"I still don't get it. Why worry when you're not going to be alive anyway?"

"G-guess I'm just weird that way. Anyway, seeing as we had a deal it's time f-for both of us to go now. I would appreciate it if you could keep q-quiet about finding me."

The polar bear took a step forward, "Well, about that. I actually have an aunt who trains rookies at the Zootopia police academy so I actually know all about you."

"Don't come closer!" The polar bear stopped in her tracks, "You're rr-related to Ursula huh? Tell her she's a giant bitch for me." Nick let out a short laugh, "Also that she was r-right about me ending up dead."

Nick began to push himself over the edge and found it was only the clenching of his abdominals that kept him from falling. He drew the two tranquilizer darts out of his pockets and prepared to jab himself with them.

"HEY! So I lied. Aunty Ursula called my family an hour ago and told us what happened. She was sobbing herself silly, which is really something if you know my aunt at all. She asked if we would all go out and look for you. So here I am."

"V-very touching. Good story but you should work on your delivery for n-next time. Sorry kid."

"Wait! If- if you do this I'm going to tell them exactly what happened. They are going to fish your half eaten, crab covered corpse out of the drink. I bet your old mum is going to be thrilled when they bring her in to identify you." She took a step forward.

"It's t-too late to turn back now. I tried my best but really, I've b-been a screw up my entire life. No reason to think that this time would turn out any d-differently."

"Just stop ok. Please. Listen I also lied about not caring. In fact, the moment you jump in there I plan to dive right in after you." She took another step forward.

"The w-water is almost sixty feet deep. Good luck."

At that moment, from just around the bend that led down into Low Town, Nick spotted a myriad of flashing blue and red lights careening over and down the steep hill towards them.

"You called the police huh?"

Beatrix shrugged and gave him a little smile as if to say 'what did you expect'.

Before she could make another move or attempt to distract him further, Nick jammed the two tranquilizers into his arm and kicked himself off the edge of the dock.

He spun backwards through the air for a split second before crashing into the water.

Cold.
Pain.
Sinking.
Blackness.

Things were fading. The dark was giving way to a bright white expanse. Nick felt that the bottom of the lake was shining. That he was no longer sinking but rising up.

Then there was nothing.